Silly Summer Thoughts

[AgeOfUninnocence]

My ex and I broke up during the school year due to the distance between our universities, and so this summer was the first time we'd seen each other since the break up. We've only hung out a handful of times, always (except one time for a few hours) with some mutual friends. It's funny and strange to realize how little we've seen each other this summer, since last summer we were with each other nearly all the time.

 

Now that summer is drawing to a close, I've just had some ridiculous thoughts that I've wondered if anyone else have shared. For instance, my ex is single right now and doesn't have anyone he's pursuing or interested in since he's not at college right now. He also doesn't really have a lot of people to hang out with this summer. And it kinda just makes me feel rejected that he doesn't try to hang out with me more and like take advantage of me, or friend with benefits me or something. Considering he's a guy and guys are always thinking about sex and girls and whatnot all the time. So many guys try to do this to their ex girlfriends, and it just makes me wonder; am I really so horrible and repulsive that my ex doesn't even want to use me to get himself off and make himself feel good?

 

I know the answer is that I should be lucky my ex isn't leading me on and messing with me, even if he was such a terrible douche in the break up. I guess it's just having not been in that situation, I wonder what it would be like and wish it would happen so I could see how I'd feel.

[Feelin Frisky]

Perhaps you should not project such negatives on to yourself as "horrible" or your post "silly". You're lonely and would like something expedient with someone you know. I can empathize with that. But alway be careful what you tell yourself--you might just believe it. If you had a tough break up it could be asking for another one to go backward. I advise squaring yourself with reality and try to get going on your own out-coming. It's the best investment to throw yourself into doing something that might make you someone to be admired and discovered. Your old boy friend seems to have committed to his own independence. It sucks right now, but you'll feel better about yourself if you start filling your life up with steps of progressive advancement. Cheers.