what do guys expect?

[Katelynn]

I am just starting dating after a long relationship. I have not dated a lot in the past, and have been tied down for 5 years. What do guys expect on the first, second date, etc. I don't want to get labeled as a prude, however, I can't see just screwing around with a guy i barely know...I guess im the kinda person who waits til i know a person to get more intimate and involved. So, from a guys and gals perspective, when is the right time for a first kiss, and what is the general consensus about not kissing a guy for the first date or two. I have a date next week, and this question has been in the back of my mind. Also, can i be sure that he will make the first move?

[Tony T]

Last question first...you can't be sure of anything...though guys do typically make the first move, they don't always depending on the guy.

 

In dating, there are very general rules but every date and every person is unique. The best thing to do is conduct yourself as it comes naturally to you. There may be guys you will never want to kiss as long as you live, much less on any date. There may be a date where a special bond and connectedness forms and you may want to kiss him right off the bat.

 

Other situations call for a hug, or even a handshake and a smile a no dates thereafter.

 

These questions cannot be answered in general, at least not anymore. Play it by ear. If he goes for a kiss on the first date and you simply don't feel the same way about it, convert it to a hug. If you don't want to hug him, just totally back off and grab his hand.

 

Do what your heart tells you to do, not what any rule may be...there aren't any anyway.

 

As for what guys expect on the first date. Some expect a good time and a small kiss, others expect to hit the sack. Exactly what transpires on your first, second, third, etc. dates will depend solely on your choice of dates, the degree of class they poassess, and the chemistry that develops between the two of you.

 

If the guy seems pretty sharp and understanding, let him know he's the first new guy you've dated in a very long time. That way he'll understand your uncertainties. If he doesn't, he's a dud you'll not want to go out with again anyway. If your not sure of where the guy's coming from, don't let him know you've been out of circulation for five years.

 

I sincerely hope you will never again choose a relationship in which you will consider it to have been "tied down" for five years or whatever. I hate to be tied down for even a few minutes. If you are one prone to being "tied down" or doing other things against your will, be very careful in your dating experiences.

 

I would NEVER get over it if a woman told other people she had been tied down with me for even a second.

[billy the kid]

Most guys don't expect much on the first or second date, if they are looking for a serious relationship. A little kiss wouldn't hurt on the second date, but by then you'll know him better and I'm sure you'll know what to do..The key is, is he wanting to get serious, or just playing the field.

I am just starting dating after a long relationship. I have not dated a lot in the past, and have been tied down for 5 years. What do guys expect on the first, second date, etc. I don't want to get labeled as a prude, however, I can't see just screwing around with a guy i barely know...I guess im the kinda person who waits til i know a person to get more intimate and involved. So, from a guys and gals perspective, when is the right time for a first kiss, and what is the general consensus about not kissing a guy for the first date or two. I have a date next week, and this question has been in the back of my mind. Also, can i be sure that he will make the first move?