liar

[allison]

okay, Let me give you a bit of background. My partner and I have been together for almost 4 years. We started dating just after he was discharged from rehab. He eventually went back to using drugs. I also experimented with drugs for a short while. Apparently he did one drug that I hate about a year ago. Recently he asked me if I would like to try Extacy with him. I quickly shot him down, yet was distressed by his question. It being on my mind I started talking to friends about it. Then about a week ago a mutual friend explained that he had already taken Extacy. I was so angry with him for decieving me. When I arrived home, he was still there and had yet to leave for work. I couldn't control myself and acted immature and irrational. I screamed at him and flung his glasses across the room. I ran out of the apartment sobbing and tried to leave in my car, but was too upset to drive. He followed me outside and I asked him if the accusation was true. He replied that it wasn't true and I became very confused. I went back inside and was calmed by a friend (the informant). Eventually he returned and fessed up to his previous actions. His excuse for lying was that I hated the drug so much that he didn't want to tell me. He has apologized and realises that I don't trust him anymore. I don't know what to do. My friends tell me to get out, yet my family says to work it out. Please help

 

allison

[Tony T]

Your family would love to see you happy but probably knows little about the perils of drugs or the dangers you are in being around it. Your friends, closer to your age, know those dangers well.

 

It is not in your best interests to be living with or to eventually marry someone who uses life threatening drugs. It's a good way to a very eratic, crime-filled, poverty stricken life. The odds are in favor of his premature death as a result of using drugs, particularly extacy (read about it on the Internet).

 

Further, if you are in his presence when he is ultimately arrested for possession, use or even distribtuion of illegal substances, you will be carted off to jail with him and it will be your responsibility to convince lawmen you were not involved in his drug activities.

 

If this man truly cares about you, he will enter drug rehabilitation at once. That will be no assurance he will be able to remain off the drugs forever but it shows good faith.

 

If he loves you, he will not want you involved in his illegal activities and will free you to find a caring, loving man who is law abiding and thinks enough of you not to suck you into this sort of activity.

 

I know you love and respect your parents but they come from a different generation and most like don't fathom just how serious this is. I'm with your friends on this one.

 

The trust issue is one more reason you need to absent yourself from his proximity. As a child, he lied to you so you wouldn't get angry. But you obviously will not be able to trust a man who is prone to conceal his use of drugs from you. It also tells you what kind of people surround him that they would think more of you and tell you what's going on rather than protect him and his lies.

 

If you do stay with him now, be sure you save money for his funeral and/or for bond money when you eventually do get picked up with him by police. PLEASE, only bond yourself out. Leave him there to get help!!!

 

If his friends told you about his drug use, they will next inform the law...you have my word on it. Extasy is not pot, it is an extremely dangerous drug.

[allison]

Tony:

 

Thank you for your advice. It is sad to say that my friends are actually the clueless ones. They are the drug users in my life. My family endured 10 years of my aunt's drug abuse. They are well aware of the dangers. My partner uses pot on a regular basis. He is too cheap to actually purchase it, doesn't want to deal it(too much of a risk financially). I am well aware of the facts on extacy. Never used it, but I have collected much knowledge on a vast array of drugs.

 

thank you

 

wanted to clear a few things up