Dating Hot girls is easier then Ugly girls

[Pink Cupcakes]

The whole post doesn't make any sense because no one is going to pursue someone they aren't attracted to for a romantic relationship anyway. And your post is someone condescending and offensive when you are stating things like "ugly" women and "smelly" middle-aged women...why do you think women of a certain age "smell"...does your Mom smell bad? Also, everyone is beautiful in their own way. Recently, a woman in a city next to me had some random crazy woman on the street spill acid in her face and now she is having to go through skin graphs. This woman had an attractive face before. When she was interviewed by the press for this heinous crime, she said "Looks don't matter, and I will someday forgive my attacker." This woman is beautiful, and though she very well is looking at facial scarring the rest of her life, she is still positive. I think she is beautiful, although when you see her, you would think "she's ugly". A man will meet her and look past her scars and not see her as ugly, but the strong beautiful woman she is, and he will be a lucky man.

I think to say "ugly women" is reflective of your own insecurities as a man and you have things within yourself to work on, Green.

Edited September 6, 2010 by Pink Cupcakes

[Green]

The whole post doesn't make any sense because no one is going to pursue someone they aren't attracted to for a romantic relationship anyway.

 

Guys actualy do it all the time. Somedude81 was talking about how he'd be fine dating his idea of a 6. Thats no my idea of a 6... he want to date his own idea of a 6. He also admitted he would do this because he thinks he has a better chance dating a girl who is not really that attractive. He sees attractive girl but he talks himself out of EVER trying.

 

And I'm sorry to use him as an example but he did post in this thread about it and LOTS of guys are like this. In fact for a short short time I believed in Settling but then I realized how pointless it is.

 

Yes this thread is common sense so in that way giving it as advice "date some one you are attracted to" sounds obviouse. But many guys don't believe in dating their idea of "hot" and think it is easier to date uglier girls when in fact those relationships are more likely to end quicker and be less satisfying.

[Green]

And your post is someone condescending and offensive when you are stating things like "ugly" women and "smelly" middle-aged women...why do you think women of a certain age "smell"...does your Mom smell bad? Also, everyone is beautiful in their own way. Recently, a woman in a city next to me had some random crazy woman on the street spill acid in her face and now she is having to go through skin graphs. This woman had an attractive face before. When she was interviewed by the press for this heinous crime, she said "Looks don't matter, and I will someday forgive my attacker." This woman is beautiful, and though she very well is looking at facial scarring the rest of her life, she is still positive. I think she is beautiful, although when you see her, you would think "she's ugly". A man will meet her and look past her scars and not see her as ugly, but the strong beautiful woman she is, and he will be a lucky man.

I think to say "ugly women" is reflective of your own insecurities as a man and you have things within yourself to work on, Green.

 

I don't think women of a certain age smelled I was using it as an example of some one who wasn't attractive yet some guy out there is dating cause he thinks of her as gettable. Some people truely do have lowered expectaitions and they are genuinly attracted to what I would consider unnatractive to them great... but this is for the guys who actively seek out less attractive women because they are to scared to take a chance on women they really like. Stop getting offended because you completly mis understand this thread on every level.

[Gallaxia]

 

 

 

You are thread jacking but ......

 

Look arguing about PUA's is pointless. ....

 

I agree that it was a bit of a thread jack and I'm sorry for that.But it does play into your original post and I had to bring light to one aspect of it. (Because) who do PUAs gravitate towards?

[Pink Cupcakes]

Calling women "ugly" shows you are very emotionally immature and do have inner insecurities, however.

 

 

I don't think women of a certain age smelled I was using it as an example of some one who wasn't attractive yet some guy out there is dating cause he thinks of her as gettable. Some people truely do have lowered expectaitions and they are genuinly attracted to what I would consider unnatractive to them great... but this is for the guys who actively seek out less attractive women because they are to scared to take a chance on women they really like. Stop getting offended because you completly mis understand this thread on every level.

[dispatch3d]

Why would you take offense to it?

 

Just as you're a man and on one side of the argument, as women, we're on the other side.

 

I'm speaking for myself here but, I've come to that conclusion, having lived it, I've also read The Game, I've studied human behavior...

 

To say what women assume of PUAs is wrong, based on observation & experience, is completely disregarding women entirely from the equation. Which can't be done as women are the other half of the experience/equation. Otherwise you'd be seeking something else-pets, plants etc. Think about it... But I think I'm starting to digress from the OPs question....

 

Your opinion is misinformed and incorrect. You are supposing views of pua's which are not true. Furthermore, they are very very negative. It would be like me saying all women are just out to use and abuse women. It's offensive.

[Green]

Calling women "ugly" shows you are very emotionally immature and do have inner insecurities, however.

 

I'm just trying to communicate. I apologize for using the word ugly. I should have named the thread "Dating girls you are attracted to is easier then settling" I really used the word "hot" and "ugly" as tools to get my point across but I see how its offensive.

[dispatch3d]

and green, I warned you, women will not like the subject matter of this thread . Some stuff kinda has to be talked about candidly without women around.

[Green]

and green, I warned you, women will not like the subject matter of this thread . Some stuff kinda has to be talked about candidly without women around.

 

I agree but this thread isn't really meant for womens benefit as I'm trying to help out guys who have the crazy notion that settling works. although its entertaining to hear what women have to say on the subjet when they arn't trying to shame me ect.

[Gallaxia]

Your opinion is misinformed and incorrect. You are supposing views of pua's which are not true. Furthermore, they are very very negative. It would be like me saying all women are just out to use and abuse women. It's offensive.

 

 

Don't get me wrong, I respect your opinion. But find it interesting that despite Green (also) agreeing with a portion of my sentiment, you chose to single out me as being insensitive. Isn't Green a male?

 

And avoiding a subject matter for fear of what others might have to weigh in, is a bit ridiculous and immature. Adults talk things through to resolution, not settle on surface thoughts and ideas.

Edited September 6, 2010 by Gallaxia

[dispatch3d]

Don't get me wrong, I respect your opinion. But find it interesting that despite Green (also) agreeing with a portion of my sentiment, you chose to single out me as being insensitive. Isn't Green a male?

 

And avoiding a subject matter for fear of what others might have to weigh in, is a bit ridiculous and immature. Adults talk things through to resolution, not settle on surface thoughts and ideas.

 

Green didn't say anything offensive about PUA culture or people. He didn't imply they are out to do anything devious or evil. He didn't offer his opinion on whether it works or not. He hasn't used it, how would he know? Probably my biggest gripe is women on the whole just ASSUME they know what is in those books and ASSUME it's all evil and bad and yadayada.

 

He stated what he thought most pua people are like. I actually concur with a lot of his sentiments. Even the ones saying they add a lot of fluff to their books (they do!).

 

However he isn't offensive in anyway. He's not suggesting I or others are just out to be bastards to women. We aren't. The fact women automatically assume these things is why I never tell anyone that I read anything.

[Gallaxia]

 

You are thread jacking but your point is true the real victims are the guys... but most of the guys who follow PUA stuff like its a religion are people who have done very bad with women and are social outcasts. I figured out pretty much everything in PUA books on my own with out the silly code words and philosiphy that can easily hurt a person mind.

 

 

Top of the page.

 

Look, please don't insinuate that I'm very negative. I'm not a male basher. I just also like to look at the "why's" and "what ifs". As soon as you took offense to what I posted, you started attacking me as a person. I have yet to do that to you and I disagree with what you're saying. I didn't say anything offensive or suggest anything. I said what I said. You're putting words in my mouth.

 

That's why I initially asked you before this spun out of control, why are you specifically taking offense?

 

Dude, quite frankly, you're looking for things that aren't there! But it's good to discuss.

[motive2002]

Women and men find attractiveness on different levels. I believe a woman, who wants a long term relationship is very much more concerned about who she's dating, rather than what they look like.

Unless you're a "hot guy" most women will see right through your thin veil of sexual desire, no matter how subtle you try to be about it and be possibly put off by it. Otherwise you may just be a target for some short term fun.

 

I once was told that women date the "bad boy" alpha male types because they themselves have a fear of commitment. They can sleep with the bad boys and once the fun ends they don't have to take any responsibility for their actions because "he was a big jerk anyway".

 

Going back to character, for those of you chasing the "hot girl", have you ever thought about what it is she does that sets her apart from other women? She may have a cute face and a slammin body, but does she possess any other qualities? These are some of the things that women look for in men they want to be seriously involved with.

Maybe you aren't at the top of a Fortune 500 company and loaded with cash.. perhaps to some that matters, but are you passionate about anything other than how leet your level 80 paladin is? Do you have any real goals? Are you really talented at something? Are you creative? Do you have some kind of external drive other than "I wanna get laid by some hot chick"?

 

A simple equasion would look like this:

 

Get involved with something larger than yourself. Strive to be really good at something.

Once you've taken an active role in something you're interested in, and put real effort into it you become better and better.

As a result of pursuing something you feel better about yourself and like yourself more.

Then in turn, as you become a more interesting person and like yourself more, so it goes without saying you'll be likable and more interesting to the opposite sex.

 

I've seen hot-ass women with really average looking dudes, but what they bring to the table goes beyond just physical appearance. If that's all women cared about, nobody but Adonis would be getting any.

 

The PuA stuff is bull****. It may work if you just want to get laid, but in the end I think we all want something more than just that.

 

 

 

One other point I want to touch on is patience. Most of the men posting I see around here are acting like if they don't land the "hot girl" right now, that their life is going to end or something. Like anything else, good things come to those who wait. Your desperation will be picked up from women like a bloodhound picks up on a scent. It will be more obvious than you think.

Relax. You've got plenty of time. Self control is power, and power is an attractive trait.

 

Oh and if all you want to do is get down a hot woman's pants, be up front about it. Chances are you'll get rejected, but at least you haven't made an ass of yourself trying to use "game" on her.

[brainygirl]

I read three pages and lost interest . . . but still felt the need to comment. Chalk it up to ADD.

 

I think that green on the one hand has a point, why would anyone date someone they aren't interested in? Its silly and something most people get over while they are still young.

 

On the other hand, green's entire criteria seems to be based on appearances of the girl in question. This is where I have a problem. And not because I'll never be a "ten", but because there is so much more to a relationship than how the other person looks.

 

I'm not a ten in appearance, but I do know that I have a great personality, I have my **** together, I have a good job and I'm fun to be around. So, being not a ten, why should that make me less of a mate than a girl who is a ten but who may have other flaws.

 

I'm not saying all tens are flakes, nor am I saying that all fives are stable brainiacs, but I do wonder why the criteria is so narrow?

 

Or maybe I just don't get it.

[Shakz]

I'm not a ten in appearance, but I do know that I have a great personality, I have my **** together, I have a good job and I'm fun to be around. So, being not a ten, why should that make me less of a mate than a girl who is a ten but who may have other flaws.

 

I'm not saying all tens are flakes, nor am I saying that all fives are stable brainiacs, but I do wonder why the criteria is so narrow?

 

Or maybe I just don't get it.

 

You get it and you sound like a ten in my book. This is, by far, the silliest thread ever created. It ain't easy to date any girl, wether she be gorgeous or ghastly.

[brainygirl]

You get it and you sound like a ten in my book. This is, by far, the silliest thread ever created. It ain't easy to date any girl, wether she be gorgeous or ghastly.

 

I have my own issues and have come to term with the fact that I am not everyone's ten, and I have my own criteria for who I want as a long term mate (not being shallow and hung up on appearances being near the top of my list), but I don't think that makes me mean or some sort of prima donna.

 

Dating isn't supposed to be easy, its the way we choose our mates.

 

I have a lot of good things in my life, hence a lot to loose, so why would I let just anyone have the access and opportunity to mess things up?

[Shakz]

I have my own issues and have come to term with the fact that I am not everyone's ten, and I have my own criteria for who I want as a long term mate (not being shallow and hung up on appearances being near the top of my list), but I don't think that makes me mean or some sort of prima donna.

 

Dating isn't supposed to be easy, its the way we choose our mates.

 

I have a lot of good things in my life, hence a lot to loose, so why would I let just anyone have the access and opportunity to mess things up?

 

You have the right attitude. Knowing who you are and what you want makes you an eleven.

[Stockalone]

But even farther from the pua community I do find that my friends, and guys on this website have this mistaken belief that by SETTLING for less then they want that they get a woman easier...

 

It depends on what you mean. If getting a woman means getting a date and having the option of getting into a relationship with her, then IME, settling is easier.

 

At least for me, it was a lot easier to get dates with women I wasn't instantly attracted to. Those were women that were attractive, but I didn't feel an instant thrill/desire.

 

It was much more difficult (it only worked once) to get women I felt that thrill/desire for, to go out with me.

 

 

My last friend who settled got dumped by his fiancee and she basicly secretly moved out. Thats where settling got him... so really settling is not a full proof way to live hapily ever after... In fact if you BE YOURSELF and go for a girl you are 100% honestly attracted to you will have greater sucess.

 

That could have happened just as well with a woman he hadn't settled for. Either way, we all have our experiences and what works for some will not work for others.

[gypsy_nicky]

Guys actualy do it all the time. Somedude81 was talking about how he'd be fine dating his idea of a 6. Thats no my idea of a 6... he want to date his own idea of a 6. He also admitted he would do this because he thinks he has a better chance dating a girl who is not really that attractive. He sees attractive girl but he talks himself out of EVER trying.

 

And I'm sorry to use him as an example but he did post in this thread about it and LOTS of guys are like this. In fact for a short short time I believed in Settling but then I realized how pointless it is.

 

Yes this thread is common sense so in that way giving it as advice "date some one you are attracted to" sounds obviouse. But many guys don't believe in dating their idea of "hot" and think it is easier to date uglier girls when in fact those relationships are more likely to end quicker and be less satisfying.

 

 

actually settling is very subjective and is used in a bad light. Just as an example:

 

Are you really settling when clearly your a 6 in the looks department and you end up dating a 6 who is attractive/hot enough for you? But before, you may have had a very high opinion of yourself and thought of yourself as an 8 and were rejected by 8's consistently (even the 7's rejected you).

 

There's also another point that wherever you fall in the looks dept. (be it a 6 or a 10) you can be sure that you will be attracted also to someone equal in your looks.

 

Last, everyone is attracted to the 9's and 10's. It's called universal beauty. NOt everyone can date one though.

[Mad Max]

Last, everyone is attracted to the 9's and 10's. It's called universal beauty. NOt everyone can date one though.

 

 

Not true. Even the 9s and 10s are subjective. Some people think Megan fox is god's gift to men. Others don't think she's attractive and think Adrianna Lima is the hottest.

[brainygirl]

I guess I need someone to define "settling".

 

Is settling a: going after someone who you know isn't a good match for your values and personality or who has personal traits and habits that drive you nuts (this is how I define settling- traits being way unattractive, poor hygene, weird politics, noisy eating ect)

 

or is settling B: Dating a person who isn't the prettiest, hottest, person in the area.

 

Because one is reasonably and the other is rediculous.

[dispatch3d]

Top of the page.

 

Look, please don't insinuate that I'm very negative. I'm not a male basher. I just also like to look at the "why's" and "what ifs". As soon as you took offense to what I posted, you started attacking me as a person. I have yet to do that to you and I disagree with what you're saying. I didn't say anything offensive or suggest anything. I said what I said. You're putting words in my mouth.

 

That's why I initially asked you before this spun out of control, why are you specifically taking offense?

 

Dude, quite frankly, you're looking for things that aren't there! But it's good to discuss.

 

the sentence you highlighted isn't bashing anything as far as I'm concerned. I agree with 97% of that paragraph. "The real victims ar ethe guys" would be his opinion. Doesn't bother me. Only thing in the whole paragraph I don't agree with (and it's not offensive at all).

 

Yours is definitely offensive. Not attacking you as a person . Just saying...

[dispatch3d]

I read three pages and lost interest . . . but still felt the need to comment. Chalk it up to ADD.

 

I think that green on the one hand has a point, why would anyone date someone they aren't interested in? Its silly and something most people get over while they are still young.

 

On the other hand, green's entire criteria seems to be based on appearances of the girl in question. This is where I have a problem. And not because I'll never be a "ten", but because there is so much more to a relationship than how the other person looks.

 

I'm not a ten in appearance, but I do know that I have a great personality, I have my **** together, I have a good job and I'm fun to be around. So, being not a ten, why should that make me less of a mate than a girl who is a ten but who may have other flaws.

 

I'm not saying all tens are flakes, nor am I saying that all fives are stable brainiacs, but I do wonder why the criteria is so narrow?

 

Or maybe I just don't get it.

 

lots of guys wouldn't hit on the ten because she's a ten. You're likely better off not being one fwiw.

[Green]

Its all subjective. Basicly this advice is for guys who think something in their minds along the lines of "I'll go for that girl not because I am very attracted but because she isn't that great so that makes her gettable"

[brainygirl]

Its all subjective. Basicly this advice is for guys who think something in their minds along the lines of "I'll go for that girl not because I am very attracted but because she isn't that great so that makes her gettable"

 

That's awful, I'd rather not be hit on than be hit on by someone who thinks I'm not do great and gettable.

 

Those men are silly. Go for who you are interested in, have a little class, and realize that even if she says no or turns out to be a complete mess, its not big deal.

 

Geesh.