dreamyluv7 Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Hi, I have been dating an awesome guy for almost 3 years now. I really wanted to get engaged to him a year ago and told me that he wasn't ready to get married. He promises that once he moves out his parent's house that he wants to engaged and that I should be patient with him until then. He is going to move out in 6 months. He says until that I should be content with just loving him. We have a long distance relationship of 2 and half hours and I lucky if I see him every other weekend. He also feels that I try to control him because I want to see him every weekend and feel uneasy about him spending more time with other girls during the week then me. I am not sure if I should wait 6 months for this "so called change," to be his first priority. But he never has made a promise that he hasn't kept so, I am having a hard time trusting him to commit to it. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 You should never get engaged to save a relationship. If your relationship has issues, they should be reconciled prior to the proposal, or at least the nuptials. If you have control issues, communicate, but I see one huge issue already, the distance. If you think you're going to be able to function as a couple forever, you need to know what it's like to live with the person, not just see them on weekends at their best. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 long distance is tough... could you possibly wait but also see other guys in the meantime? if he's not up for it in 6 months and you really wanna be in pre-marital condition, then you'll wanna date someone else, right? -yes Link to post Share on other sites
morrigan Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Forcing the marriage issue on anyone is not a good idea. If your boyfriend has said right out he isn't ready to get married now, then he isn't ready. If he moves into his own residence and still is not ready to get married, then you need to ask yourself if you're ok with just dating him. Link to post Share on other sites
The flower girl Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 My bf lives three hours drive away, we see eachother every weekend but if any of us wants a bit of space we just say and have the odd weekend off so we can do our own thing. Why wont he see you every weekend? Have you asked him, does he say its because hes busy or because he likes his space? Link to post Share on other sites
Author dreamyluv7 Posted February 24, 2004 Author Share Posted February 24, 2004 Well, we had the talk already that he wants his space to be able to hang out with his friends on the weekends. When we first started dating we handled the distance quite well and now it seems like the distance prevents us from growing closer. So I am not sure what to think? And on the marriage issue he feels that he is ready now, but wants to wait until he moves out of the house and he basically already has the ring. He just doesn't just want to do it well he still lives at home. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 Originally posted by dreamyluv7 He just doesn't just want to do it well he still lives at home. That makes a lot of sense. Link to post Share on other sites
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