maldita42 Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 hi! I've decided to break up w/ my MM but how can I totally break off from him if there is a child that ties us? What an idiot I was to agree to have a child w/ him. Pls help I want to break off totally from him what should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
feeling silly Posted February 23, 2004 Share Posted February 23, 2004 Why is it that you want to leave him? How does he feel about a separation? It's a difficult question to answere without knowing more information. Divorces/separations happen all the time, but sometimes it happens without fully understanding the situation or for lack of knowing your options. It is very difficult when children are involved and you should be absolutely positive that this is something you want to do. My suggestion is to add some more info here. Link to post Share on other sites
Author maldita42 Posted February 24, 2004 Author Share Posted February 24, 2004 feeling silly, here's my story: I'm having an affair w/ a MM for almost two years now, we've been together for 4 months when I got pregnant, he then promised that he will take care of me and our child and won't leave us coz he said he loves me. Then he told me that when I graduate from college we'll live together. he's separated from his wife for almost a year now and has been living in his boss's house (which is near my house) now. I started thinking of leaving him coz he doesn't give child support though he always say that he will give support. I know he loves me and our child and I love him so much that I agreed to be his mistress. I know he can't marry me so I decided to just leave him. But that's my problem now, how can I leave him and get him out of my life when there is our child. I love him still and it hurts me to even think of leaving him. He's so good and we went along fine but I don't wAnt to be a mistress forever. He doesn't know that I'm thinking of leaving him, maybe I will maybe I won't. I don't know what to do anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
feeling silly Posted February 24, 2004 Share Posted February 24, 2004 Maldita, My advice to you is to focus on you and your baby. You say you're in school, that's awsome. Keep it up, in time you will be able to provide decently for the two of you. As for child support, I'm not familiar with the laws in Asia. However, as the father, it is his responsibility to help raise the baby financialy and emotionaly. You don't need to sit around waiting for this man just because you have a child together, but you should allow him to have access to the child. Move on (as hard as it may be), there are plenty of men out there (good ones) that will love you and the baby and treat you the way you deserve. For now, I would just focus on being a mother and a student, and don't let him get away without helping you! I believe that if a man is willing to leave his wife for his mistress, there needs to be a certain amount of grieving time for him to make that transition. Without that time, you will never have a proper relationship with him. Maybe later on when the two of you are more stable as individuals, it could work. But I don't think now is the time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author maldita42 Posted February 24, 2004 Author Share Posted February 24, 2004 feeling silly, you're right I should concentrate on my studies and our child. I talked to him last night (via SMS) and he told me to give him time he said he wants us to be a family, though he can't afford financially the annullment of their marriage. And you're right maybe now's not the right time for us. thanks! I really appreciate your advice. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts