Monetigerlily Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 ...and it's driving me mad" to quote of of my favourite singers. Briefly: I was involved with a co-worker 2 years ago (he was engaged, I was married...I know, I know!) and he broke it off. Now they're married and I'm divorced (but in a relationship with my BF of one year) and still pining for him. Oh yes, did I mention the fact that we're co-workers?! We tried to stay friends after we broke up (meeting for lunch, talking on the phone/texting, etc.) but the pain was too much and so I decided to go NC with him, which I have maintained for 3 months now. It hasn't really helped me move on, I still think about him constantly and rue what might have been. Next month we're working together so NC will end, which I'm half-dreading, half-relishing. It hurts to imagine him happy with his new life while I'm struggling here with mine. Of course, I paint a rosy picture of my life with my new BF for him, but I still feel jealous that he's got this picture perfect life and I don't. Ugh, I just wish I could snap out of it and move on but right now I feel stuck. The NC didn't diminish my feelings for him, I still ache for him everyday. I guess I know now that I can't have him and it's breaking my heart. I never knew getting over someone you loved could be this difficult. Link to post Share on other sites
Ajax Posted September 22, 2010 Share Posted September 22, 2010 Just to put things in perspective... Lets say this guy were to leave his wife and get with you. So now you have him. After a year do you still want him? Maybe what you want is really just a fantasy, and you wouldn't be any happier with him than you are now. Link to post Share on other sites
nobmagnet Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 ahh The Smiths................................my teenage years. to quote my favourate lyric " and if a ten tonn bus kills the both of us.........to die by your side is such a heavenly place to be" god bless em my freind :love: chin up chuck you could be in Morrisseys head!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
nobmagnet Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 just re-read it 3 months? co worker? married?? What are you thinking?? point 1. he is married ( nasty to want a married man) Point 2. errrrrrrrrrrr the same point 3. quit! point 4. change jobs. End of. sorry but being a Morrissey wont change facts. He is off limits. If he shows an interest you still then he is a lowly worm for wanting another woman. (you dont want that do you??) nobby xx Link to post Share on other sites
LoveAintEverything Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 That really is too bad that you have to see him. The thing that worked for me was NC what so ever.... Link to post Share on other sites
mickleb Posted September 23, 2010 Share Posted September 23, 2010 I suggest you try being single and less needy. (Some might suggest desperate and selfish.) Your behaviour sounds commitmentphobic to me. You could be a passive. Read He's Scared, She's Scared for further info. Link to post Share on other sites
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