Going on a "so-called" date with a guy who is NOT my boyfriend? Opinions?

[dreamyluv7]

Hi- I am not sure what to think about dances in general.

 

See, I view going to a dance as equal to an actual date.

 

I have a dance coming up and my boyfriend said go if you want, I will be happy if you are happy. He has prior obligations, so he can't make it.

 

One of my good guy friend's asked me to go with him and I am not sure about.

 

I mean, I feel that if I went with him I would be unfaithful to my boyfriend who claims he wouldn't mind.

 

I said I wasn't going to go because of the ill feelings I felt inside, he claims that it is a trust issue, but I told him that it seems he is giving me permission to go on a date with another man.

 

Opinions?

[Darkangelism]

He prolly doesnt view a dance as a date, and he knows you won't cheat on him, if you are uncomfortable then don't go, but i think he is secure enough that he trusts you.

[dyermakerr]

Is it a formal?

 

I think that if your boyfriend isn't bothered by it, go ahead. He obviously trusts you enough to set boundaries for yourself and remain both physically and emotionally faithful to him. Do you think his trust is misplaced?

[SoleMate]

It's OK as long as you make it clear that this is a friendship outing. It's similar to the way two girls who are just good friends can go to a dance together. You needn't pair off like Noah's Ark. It's nice your bf wants you to go even though he's not a dancer.

[dreamyluv7]

Yeah, the dance is a formal, almost like a prom type and my date and I would have to split hotel costs and I am sure about that part either.

[dyermakerr]

I would think that spending the prom night with the guy is pushing it.

 

It all boils down to the fact that it bothers you. If it bothers you, don't do it. But don't hold it against your boyfriend that he was trying to be cool about it either.

[Darkangelism]

Spending the night is kinda pushing it, why not just go home after?

[dreamyluv7]

I don't have a car and it's in a town that is an 1 hour from where I live and my date doesn't have a car either.

[dyermakerr]

It sounds like it's making you uncomfortable. Don't do it, if you're not okay with it, but don't hold it against your boyfriend that he trusts you so much.

[Darkangelism]

Parents? im sure they would rather u at home then with a boy, and if u do goto the hotel and share the same bed, be careful, i woud say bring a condom in case smething hapens that isnt planned, better t be safe then pregnent.

[dreamyluv7]

Hmm... I am 21 years old, and my parent's honest I driving backwards by soceity so they are not an issue.

 

And don't plan on having sex with anyone at this moment in time.

 

It's okay that you made that assumption, but I don't find pre-marital sex apprioprate at any rate.

[Darkangelism]

oh, it sounded like you were in HS, and i respect your decision to not have sex.

[dyermakerr]

The thing that led us to believe that you're in High School would be the mention of going to a prom, lol

[SoleMate]

Well, your posts leave me scratching my head, but...do NOT share a hotel room with this fellow. Sheesh.

[UCFKevin]

Well, be warned that this guy friend of yours probably DOES want you. But if your BF doesn't mind, then go for it, just don't be surprised if this dude tries anything.

[morrigan]

As long as you were honest about the dance with your boyfriend and he doesn't mind, go and have a good time.

 

As far as the hotel situation, get separate rooms. Make it clear you are having fun with a friend, but dancing is all you two will be doing.