Married Man

[sally06]

Yeah, but if you love your wife that much! why risk everything ???

[MorningCoffee]

Yeah, but if you love your wife that much! why risk everything ???

 

I think it was Robin Williams who joked that a man's circulatory system can only supply blood to one or the other of his "heads" at a time, so when the lower one is engaged, the one on his shoulders is out of commission. Or something like that.

[sally06]

I like that.

[pureinheart]

Sally-

 

You're in trouble.

 

You have completely different expectations than he does of this relationship between you.

 

He told you that when he said that this would last until he got scared.

 

He's telling you that this will last until he's afraid that this relationship costs him something from the rest of his life. The loss of his wife, family, monetary loss due to divorce, whatever.

 

He's telling you that he's only going to invest in a relationship until that happens...and that means that he does NOT want to fall in love with you. He has no intention of expanding this 'relationship' with you.

 

All he wants is what he's getting from you now...as long as it doesn't cost him anything.

 

The good news is that he probably didn't care about the dog hair on the bed...because the only thing he cares about what was he got from you there.

 

He doesn't care about the state of your house because he doesn't care about anything other than what YOU DO FOR HIM.

 

Given that you're already hoping that this is or will become a "love affair"...showing your expectations are completely opposite of his...you're headed for heck in a handbasket.

 

Thanks I did guess. Hey guys thanks for your help! I guess it was never to be X Sally , trying 2 get a grip .

 

Hi Sally ((((((((((hugs))))))))))

 

Please my dear, listen to CarHill and Owl...they are speaking volumns here and know men well as they are men...real ones that care what happens to others. I see all of the questions about why do MM have A etc. many have many different reasons for A's...in your case, it could be a midlife crisis.

 

Based on what you said, you are selling yourself short ....DO NOT, AND I REPEAT DO NOT SELL YOURSELF SHORT...you are a viable HUMAN BEING, not some individuals ego booster. You are worth more than this, you are worth everything.

 

There is a wonderful man out there for you, and I bet you have wonderful men trying to get your attention....give them your attention, take your pick that suits you best and letr them wine and dine you, build a R, then a life...I see a beautiful life in your fututr if you let it happen:).

 

Owl and CH are very good at judging character (as others are on LS). I have been reading their replys for several years now and they are always on the money, caring with a lot of hard knocks wisdom that they give us for free from their past pain....(((((((((hugs again Sally)))))))

[sally06]

I hear what you are saying but ! I am crazy about him, and I now know he is me! It is just he is scared of losing his lifestyle and job ? How sad is that ?

[lizzibeth]

I hear what you are saying but ! I am crazy about him, and I now know he is me! It is just he is scared of losing his lifestyle and job ? How sad is that ?

You are admittedly crazy about him.

Don't you think if he was as crazy about you as you are him that he wouldn't care about anything else but being with you?

I won't try and see into anyone's mind here but he's kind of done you a favor here by giving you the "i'll do this til I'm scared" routine. At least in that respect, he was saying "I'll continue to bang you until it's no longer convenient for me".

[Owl]

I hear what you are saying but ! I am crazy about him, and I now know he is me! It is just he is scared of losing his lifestyle and job ? How sad is that ?

 

This tells me volumes.

 

You're not ready for advice yet.

 

You're still in the throes of it all...and you're not yet ready/willing to truly listen to and act on advice that would cause you to reconsider what you're doing at the moment.

 

You're going to stay where you're at until the situation changes, and you get hurt.

 

This affair is going to continue until he DOES "get scared'...and throws you under the bus to rush away and try to save his marriage once he's been caught.

 

Realize that this is really what you're signing up for.

 

When the situation changes...remember we're here for you.