mrbluenobody Posted October 31, 2010 Posted October 31, 2010 (edited) D-Lish, I believe the gist of what you said was you didn't feel someone would ever love you for who you are....warts and all. I don't know if you know for sure but your Ex didn't leave you because of your deep dark secrets. Right? It takes great courage and faith to open up to someone and let them into the darkest crevices of our soul. As you've seen, when you do this and the person still loves you it's the greatest feeling in the world. It feels like true love, meant to be, happily ever after........you feel totally accepted/safe w/that person. (Your inner child feels safe...read on) I've been with two ladies in my life that I felt comforatable enough with to share my inner self. The 1st was my 1st love and I screwed that up! We were together for 6 years and I died when she left me for good. I tried to drink myself to death and did every other unhealthy thing I could because I knew I'd never find love like that again (and my soul yearns for it). There were many ladies between my first and my last. And, well, with the last one i finally felt that deep sense of connection again.....I felt I could open up, share my world and be truly accepted...warts and all. Well, my story doesn't have a happy ending. She left me after 5 months together. Not a long time but I felt a deeper connection to her than I have with women I've been with for much longer! So, what's the moral of the story? Don't sit on the sidelines for too long. Even though you may not feel like you will open up again you never know. I never thought I find someone that I'd be that comforatable with again but I did! And, although, it didn't last, It's great to know I still have the capacity to love that deeply and even better to know there's more than one person out there I can allow myself to trust. Ultimately, your qaundry over him having said he "can't picture you growing old together" was a fear you had had, all along, in the back of your mind??? The fear of abandonment?? In order to ever have a healthy relationship you must first learn how to take care of your own emotional needs (take care of your inner child) so no matter what anyone else does she'll know that you'll never abandon her. You'll always be there for her....keep her safe......give her the love/affection she deserves. Coming from this place of safetly will allow you to let someone in again because you know you'll be there, to catch your little girl, if they decide it's time to set you free. I wish you peace, happiness and tons of love, Mr Blue Nobody Edited October 31, 2010 by mrbluenobody
Author D-Lish Posted October 31, 2010 Author Posted October 31, 2010 D-Lish, I believe the gist of what you said was you didn't feel someone would ever love you for who you are....warts and all. I don't know if you know for sure but your Ex didn't leave you because of your deep dark secrets. Right? It takes great courage and faith to open up to someone and let them into the darkest crevices of our soul. As you've seen, when you do this and the person still loves you it's the greatest feeling in the world. It feels like true love, meant to be, happily ever after........you feel totally accepted/safe w/that person. (Your inner child feels safe...read on) I've been with two ladies in my life that I felt comforatable enough with to share my inner self. The 1st was my 1st love and I screwed that up! We were together for 6 years and I died when she left me for good. I tried to drink myself to death and did every other unhealthy thing I could because I knew I'd never find love like that again (and my soul yearns for it). There were many ladies between my first and my last. And, well, with the last one i finally felt that deep sense of connection again.....I felt I could open up, share my world and be truly accepted...warts and all. Well, my story doesn't have a happy ending. She left me after 5 months together. Not a long time but I felt a deeper connection to her than I have with women I've been with for much longer! So, what's the moral of the story? Don't sit on the sidelines for too long. Even though you may not feel like you will open up again you never know. I never thought I find someone that I'd be that comforatable with again but I did! And, although, it didn't last, It's great to know I still have the capacity to love that deeply and even better to know there's more than one person out there I can allow myself to trust. Ultimately, your qaundry over him having said he "can't picture you growing old together" was a fear you had had, all along, in the back of your mind??? The fear of abandonment?? In order to ever have a healthy relationship you must first learn how to take care of your own emotional needs (take care of your inner child) so no matter what anyone else does she'll know that you'll never abandon her. You'll always be there for her....keep her safe......give her the love/affection she deserves. Coming from this place of safetly will allow you to let someone in again because you know you'll be there, to catch your little girl, if they decide it's time to set you free. I wish you peace, happiness and tons of love, Mr Blue Nobody Thank you Blue. I know I have all the tools and oppotunities to move forward- to change my situation...But I often squander those opportunities because I think to myself "why bother?" My gf and her fiance had a halloween party last night- and she's been raving that her fiance has many single available friends. I got all dolled up and ready to go, and just back out at the last moment and stayed in. Why? Because I have just become comfortable and safe not putting myself out there. I want to kick myself because I think I've gotten to the point where I am setting myself up for a life of being alone.
Recommended Posts