Mixed Signals

[just Me]

I want to get back with my old beau, but the problem is he has a girlfriend. (The one who he dumped me for.) I think he still has feelings for me because he goes out of his way to find out things about me from other people. He also talks to me and sends me totally messed up signals. For example, he will tell me how he understands me on a level that he doesn't understand his new girlfriend, but then will turn around and tell me that he plans on being with her a long time. He will always bring up things that we did when we were together. He has also asked if I ever wondered what it would be like if he had never broken-up with me. He will go over to my best friends house and talk about me. She will ask him why he isn't visiting his girlfriend and he will just avoid the question. He was hanging out with my friend and I yesterday and asked me if I still had the things he gave me. I know he still has things of mine from notes I wrote to my goodluck charm necklace I gave him. I am so confused. Does he want me back? Should I try to get him back? Suggestions? Comments? Please help me answer these questions.

[Tony T]

No, he doesn't want you back...right now. But he does want you to keep thinking about him and hoping just in case his current deal, which he says will last a long time, doesn't work out.

 

There are some super scumbag human beings that will mislead very sweet people like yourself for their own very selfish reasons. He can have his cake and eat it too if he does what he needs to in order to keep you on a string while he pursues other love interests.

 

This guy is the perfect jerk. You want to stay as far from him as you can...and get messages back to him that you would go out with O.J before you would consider seeing him again.

 

The guy is USER. One day you will see that. Meantime, don't listen to all the garbage that comes your way. I am so sorry you are buying into his crap because you don't deserve it. The proof is in the reality that he is with someone else, not with you.

 

You would be his fool if you waited around for him because you would still be waiting for him in retirement...and he would be just as happy as he could be.

 

He just plain STINKS!!!

[jen]

i totally agree with tony...LOSE HIM! WHAT A JERK HE IS!

No, he doesn't want you back...right now. But he does want you to keep thinking about him and hoping just in case his current deal, which he says will last a long time, doesn't work out.

 

There are some super scumbag human beings that will mislead very sweet people like yourself for their own very selfish reasons. He can have his cake and eat it too if he does what he needs to in order to keep you on a string while he pursues other love interests. This guy is the perfect jerk. You want to stay as far from him as you can...and get messages back to him that you would go out with O.J before you would consider seeing him again. The guy is USER. One day you will see that. Meantime, don't listen to all the garbage that comes your way. I am so sorry you are buying into his crap because you don't deserve it. The proof is in the reality that he is with someone else, not with you. You would be his fool if you waited around for him because you would still be waiting for him in retirement...and he would be just as happy as he could be. He just plain STINKS!!!

[Rogue]

The guy is just a self absorbed man who doesn't take the time to realize how this sort of emotional string pulling can hurt. The funny thing is that I always thought this was a primarily female tactic.It's a twist on the old :" Let's break up but still be friends. That way I won't feel as guilty and I can use you as an emotional dumping ground whenever I want.I'll just keep stringing you along so I can get all attention I need then move on when I'm better."