I'll call this my... NC Thread!

[livelife]

Above all, don't overrate him, he was just a guy who was in the right place at the right time...

 

Without being meany but realistic, I used to think my ex was a gift from God, but gradually I realized it was just of the same, nobody to suffer for... nobody to put in a pedestal and pray to them...

 

I just gave some light into her mundane life, it was me who saw her and her life as something special when in reality both were as plain as they can get...

 

I wonder what was I thinking ha ha!

 

You're exactly right!! It's not like they are a celebrity or anyone special, just a normal person like us!! But maybe a little worse than us Thanks, Trovador!

 

Today was better, barely thought about him. I feel weird that I still think about him when we broke up forever ago, but he still kept talking to me, so it kinda prolonged that.

[Trovador]

Hiya, how you doing?

 

I'm handling myself very well, best than expected... it's been another day in NCland... I didn't attend a brief birthday reunion, my ex was there and guess what, she sent me regards through two colleagues of mine... intending to get a rise from me I think... but I'm doing fine... it's not that I have forgotten on her, it's that I don't care about her...

 

You know something? Most of the time after the bu (if not all the time), more than wishing to see her, I wished she could see me... that's something to be careful about...

 

I hope you are getting stronger by the day!

[livelife]

Hiya, how you doing?

 

I'm handling myself very well, best than expected... it's been another day in NCland... I didn't attend a brief birthday reunion, my ex was there and guess what, she sent me regards through two colleagues of mine... intending to get a rise from me I think... but I'm doing fine... it's not that I have forgotten on her, it's that I don't care about her...

 

You know something? Most of the time after the bu (if not all the time), more than wishing to see her, I wished she could see me... that's something to be careful about...

 

I hope you are getting stronger by the day!

 

Hey! I'm doing pretty well!! I started a new job last week and have been busy with that and school. Although, all of my friends have been telling me how their boyfriends and them are getting back together, its putting me down. but oh well. Yesterday my thoughts of him were driving me crazy, I felt like i HAD to break NC and just see how he is doing. Thank god my phone is broken so I currently do not have a phone!! Then I remembered you and how upset you would be with me

 

I'm glad to hear your doing so well! I know what you mean how you say you just want her to see you. To see how good you look and how your taking care of yourself. I want to do the same! I actually have a guy that wants to hang out with me, although he and his gf just went through a breakup. I'm not wanting anything serious unless I start to like this guy, hes just someone cool to hang out with- and to see my ex when im with him would be priceless

[Trovador]

Hey, I wouldn't be upset if you break up with NC, ha ha... If anything, I'd feel sad for you because in NC the punishment is greater than the fault... I mean, you'd feel worse than before, so, if you know nothing good can come from breaking NC, why would you do it?

 

But I've been there so I know what the drift is, but believe me, I am truly repented of breaking NC... I never gained anything out of it and I lost almost everything, my dignity included...

 

Come on, you can do it, you must do it...

[livelife]

Hey, I wouldn't be upset if you break up with NC, ha ha... If anything, I'd feel sad for you because in NC the punishment is greater than the fault... I mean, you'd feel worse than before, so, if you know nothing good can come from breaking NC, why would you do it?

 

But I've been there so I know what the drift is, but believe me, I am truly repented of breaking NC... I never gained anything out of it and I lost almost everything, my dignity included...

 

Come on, you can do it, you must do it...

 

I'm scared im going to!! I havent felt like this in a while- the biggest urge to contact him!

[Trovador]

The only way I am going to talk to her is if she contacts me...

 

That´s what I said when in need... it worked out...

 

Until she contacted me...

 

But I remained strong... anyway, it was for nothing...

 

Hang on, a day at a time... do something... better, do something with someone...

[livelife]

I stuck through it thanks so much, Trovador. Seriously- your a big help and I appreciate it!! Today should be better

[Trovador]

Fine!

 

Another day in NC land. I keep feeling good, despite I dreamt last night about her. No way I am calling texting her or trying to run into her.

 

But yesterday she came in the area where I work. For the second time in a year. First was when we had a big fight. I mean, it's possible she did it because of me. To get a rise of me or she plainly wanted me to see her. It was a small setback, but I won't budge.

 

I've discovered I don't miss her anymore.

 

I hope you are doing well. Keep busy. Soon we are to going to laugh all this drama off!

[Trovador]

Hi, I hope you are doing better...

 

NC is good for many resons, one of them is to avoid listening to your ex, who might be tempting you... if you are in NC is because supposedly you don't want your ex back...

 

My ex caved in and called . Basically, she spilled the beans... in her cryptic language she stated we might start over... that she didn't know how important I was to her, etc...

 

She called me later and I tried her. I asked her directly if she loves me. She balked, and sounded a bit angry... I told you already she said... in her way of course...

 

It's not worth...

 

I think that saying about absence making the heart grow fonder is true...

 

But only when it's real absence...

 

Thanks for listening, this being your thread and all...

 

Keep me updated

[iknow]

ive been going NC for a while, except for and awkward run in...

but i sometimes question if absence does make the heart grow fonder. I feel like if i do not pop up every once and a while and stir things up he will forget about me...

[livelife]

Hi, I hope you are doing better...

 

NC is good for many resons, one of them is to avoid listening to your ex, who might be tempting you... if you are in NC is because supposedly you don't want your ex back...

 

My ex caved in and called . Basically, she spilled the beans... in her cryptic language she stated we might start over... that she didn't know how important I was to her, etc...

 

She called me later and I tried her. I asked her directly if she loves me. She balked, and sounded a bit angry... I told you already she said... in her way of course...

 

It's not worth...

 

I think that saying about absence making the heart grow fonder is true...

 

But only when it's real absence...

 

Thanks for listening, this being your thread and all...

 

Keep me updated

 

I like it when People help me, So i like to help them as well! Im mad at myself. I BROKE NC. It wasnt bad though. All I did was ask how he was doing. Multiple times i tried to end the conversation by saying " sorry to bother you, i just wanted to check up." and " ok well I guess it was nice talking to you...bye!" and all those times I gave him the perfect out to stop talking, he continuted to talk. He was really excited when I texted him... He goes " Heyy!!!!!" and then he goes, " no Im glad you texted me:)"

 

I just kept it casual, just asked how he was doing, he asked how I was, i said I ahve been reallly good and that I have been working. The next day he asked me where I worked, I told him and he goes Ill have to try it sometime. I work at a frozen yogurt place, so I go " if you like frozen yogurt, then yeah." Haha! I didnt realize how mean it sounded. then i realized I was talking to 2 different people, but got them mixed up sometime in the convo, so I told him that. and he goes yeah I was like umm ok. I asked him why he said that and he goes, " because you didnt sound happy that i wanted to stop by" And i didnt really reply to that. He kept the convo going by asking me " whats up" and I replied,asking him what was new with him, then He didnt reply. SO I go, alright it was nice talking to you and he goes " my phone was charging, whats up. I said nevermind and the conversation ended.

 

 

Im fine after talking to him, I have had guys start to give me attention, so its nice. This one guy I liked sophmore year told me last night he liked me too. He has a girlfriend and they have been together for almost a year so I was kinda weirded out that he was telling me this, and telling me " well i call you when Im single." SO im doing alot better, and Im finally ready to move on!

[livelife]

ive been going NC for a while, except for and awkward run in...

but i sometimes question if absence does make the heart grow fonder. I feel like if i do not pop up every once and a while and stir things up he will forget about me...

 

I agree with you- thats why at sometimes I decide I want to break NC. Because if not, if your totally gone, they don't have anything to think about you from!

[Trovador]

Be careful what you wish for, they might come back!

Do you remember the story of the dog chasing the truck and the truck stops? The dog thinks now what do I do?

 

While it is nice to know that my ex still cares about me, I was better before she contacted me. I am not thinking about going back together but what do I do now? I am not cut out to tell her I don't want to talk to her.

 

By the look of things, it seems they think more about you when you are gone. The dynamic behind this is that this time they might think is for real, that they are really losing you. If you keep around them, they don't have a reason to be afraid and worse, they realize you are not totally over them.

 

Truth is what we all seek is to heal and be in peace. There should not be only a path to achieve that. Best regards!

[livelife]

Be careful what you wish for, they might come back!

Do you remember the story of the dog chasing the truck and the truck stops? The dog thinks now what do I do?

 

While it is nice to know that my ex still cares about me, I was better before she contacted me. I am not thinking about going back together but what do I do now? I am not cut out to tell her I don't want to talk to her.

 

By the look of things, it seems they think more about you when you are gone. The dynamic behind this is that this time they might think is for real, that they are really losing you. If you keep around them, they don't have a reason to be afraid and worse, they realize you are not totally over them.

 

Truth is what we all seek is to heal and be in peace. There should not be only a path to achieve that. Best regards!

 

Hm i cant seem to understand the quote about the dog.. can you explain that?

Yeah its always nice to know someone still cares about you! Did you mean you are not going to cut her out? or you are going to cut her out?

 

ANd your reasoning behind not talking is SO true. There are little things I guess you could do to pop back into their thoughts- for instance, if your friends on facebook ( im not) they have your profile to look at, see how much fun your having and such. I was so mad I broke NC, but now I do feel better. I hope it stays like this. From now on, if I want to, I will stay stronger and not break it. Hes not worth my time!

[Trovador]

About the story, you have been wishing for your ex to tell you that he'd like to start over, you have lost sleep, weight etc. over that, but some day you put all that behind you and start to feel good, then your ex appear and say he's willing to give the relationship another chance... what do you do then?

 

That which you desired so much is in front of you, and now you don't want it...

 

My ex has been calling me all day and I feel uncomfortable about that... In other words, I don't like to be chased (I don't like to chase either) and I realize it's only because I decided this story had really ended... Is it only when you go away that they come back?

 

I didn't think at all about this situation, I always thought either she was going to come back or I would move on... I never thought of these scenarios becoming one... I guess my truck stopped... this is no better than pining away for an ex...

 

Sorry for my rant, I guess is time to restart NC...

[livelife]

About the story, you have been wishing for your ex to tell you that he'd like to start over, you have lost sleep, weight etc. over that, but some day you put all that behind you and start to feel good, then your ex appear and say he's willing to give the relationship another chance... what do you do then?

 

That which you desired so much is in front of you, and now you don't want it...

 

My ex has been calling me all day and I feel uncomfortable about that... In other words, I don't like to be chased (I don't like to chase either) and I realize it's only because I decided this story had really ended... Is it only when you go away that they come back?

 

I didn't think at all about this situation, I always thought either she was going to come back or I would move on... I never thought of these scenarios becoming one... I guess my truck stopped... this is no better than pining away for an ex...

 

Sorry for my rant, I guess is time to restart NC...

 

I totally understand what you're saying. But in the case with My ex, I dont ever see him coming back. Im pretty sure i scared him for good! Even if you say you're over them, You really arent until you dont think about them/talk about them anymore. ITs crazy, but your right. They do come back once you dont care for them anymore. I will laugh if that happens with my ex. That kinda happened at the end of this summer, then Idk where I messed up, but oh well. we'll see if he comes back!

 

Im glad though that you're over her. I wish I were in your situation! I will get there one day. Its ok for the rant, Im here to listen! thats what LS is for:)

[Trovador]

Hope you feel good and are taking things easy...

 

I guess you never stop thinking about them... I still think daily of another ex and since she was a hottie sometimes I entertain impure thoughts about her... ja ja! Seriously, I have never forgotten her, despite I don't feel anything for her and actually have turned down a meeting with her...

[Trovador]

You know, I talked about two hours to my ex ex... no, not really... it is odd being in this situation, how I appreciate now the silence, the solitude and indifference of the days before this happened..

 

She didn't want to "rebreak up"... so we arranged something, she will call once in a while if she feels up to, and just for about 10 minutes... I was clear. I told her I will never call her and that I wasn't interested in nothing more than the simplest of acquaintances...

 

You know, there must be a time to let go of NC... I mean it doesn't matter anymore if you talk or not to your ex... but as I still feel adamant at not talking to her, maybe I need it a bit more...

[livelife]

You know, I talked about two hours to my ex ex... no, not really... it is odd being in this situation, how I appreciate now the silence, the solitude and indifference of the days before this happened..

 

She didn't want to "rebreak up"... so we arranged something, she will call once in a while if she feels up to, and just for about 10 minutes... I was clear. I told her I will never call her and that I wasn't interested in nothing more than the simplest of acquaintances...

 

You know, there must be a time to let go of NC... I mean it doesn't matter anymore if you talk or not to your ex... but as I still feel adamant at not talking to her, maybe I need it a bit more...

 

Im doing good! last night I was thinking that I felt bad about some things I had said, but I stopped those thoughts before I let it take control of me! That's funny about your sexy ex hahaha. So tell me, How long did it take you to get into the place your at now? how many times did you break NC, how long did you go Nc for?

[Trovador]

Glad to hear you are in control, remember a day at a time...

 

Well, I never broke up NC per se... being coworkers was pretty hard not to run into each other, and we found ourselves talking again... most times she was the one to break it by calling me or just stopping me and talking to me... this happened during about three months...

 

She was adamant about being friends. So I did it, but I was already getting over her. This was about a month ago. So that's it.

 

This was no a gift from Heaven, though. I really got tired of all the drama and giving excessive importance to a woman. I was fed up with the situation. I forced myself to believe I was better without her. And someday, I realized I didn't care about her anymore. It was a committment with myself and I fulfilled it.

 

It's funny how her words and actions don't hurt me anymore.

[livelife]

Glad to hear you are in control, remember a day at a time...

 

Well, I never broke up NC per se... being coworkers was pretty hard not to run into each other, and we found ourselves talking again... most times she was the one to break it by calling me or just stopping me and talking to me... this happened during about three months...

 

She was adamant about being friends. So I did it, but I was already getting over her. This was about a month ago. So that's it.

 

This was no a gift from Heaven, though. I really got tired of all the drama and giving excessive importance to a woman. I was fed up with the situation. I forced myself to believe I was better without her. And someday, I realized I didn't care about her anymore. It was a committment with myself and I fulfilled it.

 

It's funny how her words and actions don't hurt me anymore.

 

Exactly! Today I feel fine! Last night I missed him. Its just because all my friends ex's are talking to them, and getting back with them, so its making me lonely. I honestly think thats the only reason that triggers these feelings sometimes. How are u?

[Trovador]

I'm doing fine, good you are on track again!

 

Definitely, loneliness play against our wish to move forward in life, that's why you should resort to your friends and family, just avoid talking about him...

 

But in the end is up to you to work for your piece of mind...

 

Something that helped me was to stop expecting something from her... even when she called, I took it as nice thing from her done for her, not for me... somehow I killed my hopes and when you stop desiring you stop suffering...

[livelife]

I'm doing fine, good you are on track again!

 

Definitely, loneliness play against our wish to move forward in life, that's why you should resort to your friends and family, just avoid talking about him...

 

But in the end is up to you to work for your piece of mind...

 

Something that helped me was to stop expecting something from her... even when she called, I took it as nice thing from her done for her, not for me... somehow I killed my hopes and when you stop desiring you stop suffering...

 

Right-- just take it as it comes and if that emotion comes just talk myself out of it! I have stopped desiring for the most part, and your completely right, I think thats why I have gotten better. It's because you don't expect anything! just like you said! well ive been doing pretty good so far:) had a moment at work because one of the customers kinda sounded like him, but that was all.

[broken-and-lost]

Right-- just take it as it comes and if that emotion comes just talk myself out of it! I have stopped desiring for the most part, and your completely right, I think thats why I have gotten better. It's because you don't expect anything! just like you said! well ive been doing pretty good so far:) had a moment at work because one of the customers kinda sounded like him, but that was all.

 

Its not easy i feel for you!! i'm having same problems up's and downs today is a down and i really want to contact my ex but trying to stay strong.

[Trovador]

What's a piece of mind, anyway... ha ha... sorry for my poor English...

 

I remember that when I fought the urge to contact, it was uber hard or I ended calling or texting... but later, somehow, I let the urge to flow, I didn't act against it but let it be part of me, of what I was feeling at that moment in time... OK, I said, I'll call her... tomorrow... soon it wasn't a fight anymore and the desire was diminishing... of course, it helped that every time I had called she acted very cold, so I didn't want to repeat the experience... but had it been too hard, I'd have put off the phone, at least during those tough moments...

 

Keep strong!