How can I make friends??

[vampirkat]

I dunno what I'm doing wrong. Maybe I'm too nice. Maybe I'm too much of a bleeding heart. I dunno. I just can't make good friendships. I've cut off the old friends that weren't working for me. I'm done with boozing and smoking weed all day. Besides, my job might start back drug testing. Since I stopped smoking pot, I can think clearly now but my issues are still there. I tried therapy but it didn't work (those awful therapists claimed I was a spoiled brat, but if I'm hurting, I want it to be fixed, not told that i'm some bratty child, and that hurts). I never went back to finding a new therapist, I don't have the money for it yet and i'm scared that i'm gonna get the same response again. I'm taking st. john's wort to help alleviate the depression, but the loneliness still hurts quite awfully. i cry myself to sleep at night because of it. it's so frustrating.

 

I'm 26 years old and trying to save up to get away from my crappy roommate who's a stoner and uses me to keep the bills paid. Once i'm outta there, i'm not talking to him ever again. i hate him so much, what the hell was i thinking that fool was going to change for the better?

 

i started going out again, but it's awkward as hell. i have social anxiety and i try not to freak out in social situations, but it sucks that i have to have a drink or two to 'warm up' just not to stumble over myself. it's bad enough i chain smoke clove cigars and some people can't stand the smell. i get ignored for that and i'm going to try and quit that too since i want to get back to exercising.

 

i try to have a positive attitude and not complain about how crummy i feel, but it's hard when i have no real friends to turn to. i want real true friends.

[skydiveaddict]

I don't think you are doing anything wrong. You've decided to change your life. That's tough in any circumstance. You will make new friends sooner than later. Believe in yourself. As for the depression, you might go see your doc about that. I would

[cloverdale]

I suggest you pick up the book "Convict Conditioning" and become athletic.

 

Focusing on something like that will give you a good long term goal that is all about you and your well-being and isn't dependent on many external things (except for necessities of course).

Edited October 12, 2010 by cloverdale

[Tim The Enchanter]

You need some activities and hobbies that you can do regularly. I know exactly how hard it is to make friends, as I'm in a similar boat to yourself. I have friends but my social life with them is deeply unsatisfying to me - I have two main friends, one of whom hardly ever goes out and seems to want everyone to socialise at his house all the time. The other friend goes out, but I only see him occasionally due to his work commitments (he works for the BBC and does unsociable hours as a matter of course).

 

Right now I'm doing evening classes - Spanish and Creative Writing. I'm not sure if I will make friends with anyone there, but at least I am getting out of my flat during the week and meeting new people. You have to do something similar.