Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 I neglected her some a quite some time never making time or if I did I would be out of there so quick and we ha little tiffs usually caused by me... But during the break up she was crying I said she was confused and wanted to focus on her self and I said I didn't do anything wrong but she had doubts Would that be a front and she knows if I'm like this right now that their can't be a future? Or is this really because she's confused (I was thinking by neglecting I caused the doubts of the relationship, because she is usually the smothering me) Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 I responded with anger then guilt tripping and then agreed and then called again guilted and called again but no answer after a week.... Please don't lecture me on this I know it was wrong it has been 3 weeks of NC was thinking about sending her a text Link to post Share on other sites
Don Ho Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 Bro, your thread isn't making a lot of sense. Maybe you can clarify. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 Bro, your thread isn't making a lot of sense. Maybe you can clarify. Sorry Im using an iPhone lol....I was neglecting my now ex girlfriend for a few months after our relationship became routine and I also had a hard time trusting her so she decided to break it off claiming she was doubting the relationship, confused and always has me on her mind but needs time to focus on herself but she was crying during the whole break up sated she loves me and it feels so right to be with me. She also started university which is causing stress because she doesn't deal With it correctly or communicate properly I have been insecure last few days Of the relationship I was texting her a lot (so I thought it was because I was needy, but don't think that's the case because she usually smothers me) After the break up she has completely cut me out of her life after I responded with anger and guilt tripping I wanted to aopologize but never got a chance it has been 5 weeks 3 Weeks NC and I still care for her we are eachothers first love and I don't think it ends here. Link to post Share on other sites
Eeyore79 Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 This happened with me and my ex. He neglected me, and although I cared about him, I eventually got fed up. I decided I deserved better, and he was never going to give it to me, so I broke up with him. I wouldn't take him back - I've dated him already and I know what he's like, I want more in a relationship than he is willing to offer. There are loads of other guys around who will give me the attention that my ex never would; I don't need him. There may be a chance of getting your girlfriend back if you can demonstrate that you're willing to change, but you'll have a struggle on your hands because she's already convinced that you're not boyfriend material - she was convinced enough to actually dump you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 This happened with me and my ex. He neglected me, and although I cared about him, I eventually got fed up. I decided I deserved better, and he was never going to give it to me, so I broke up with him. I wouldn't take him back - I've dated him already and I know what he's like, I want more in a relationship than he is willing to offer. There are loads of other guys around who will give me the attention that my ex never would; I don't need him. There may be a chance of getting your girlfriend back if you can demonstrate that you're willing to change, but you'll have a struggle on your hands because she's already convinced that you're not boyfriend material - she was convinced enough to actually dump you. I understand and I am willing to change but I am having trouble reading between the lines could it really be stress of university and stress or is it my lack of affection and appreciation Also how would go about making contact via text or phone? She ignored my last phone calls Link to post Share on other sites
paleblue Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 This happened with me and my ex. He neglected me, and although I cared about him, I eventually got fed up. I decided I deserved better, and he was never going to give it to me, so I broke up with him. I wouldn't take him back - I've dated him already and I know what he's like, I want more in a relationship than he is willing to offer. There are loads of other guys around who will give me the attention that my ex never would; I don't need him. There may be a chance of getting your girlfriend back if you can demonstrate that you're willing to change, but you'll have a struggle on your hands because she's already convinced that you're not boyfriend material - she was convinced enough to actually dump you. Hey I really like this. OP no offense, I doubt things will change for long even if you got her back. If you were really that crazy about her, you prob wouldn't have felt like this. Maybe someone else is a better match for you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 Hey I really like this. OP no offense, I doubt things will change for long even if you got her back. If you were really that crazy about her, you prob wouldn't have felt like this. Maybe someone else is a better match for you? It wasn't for no reason... I had a lot going on whenever I would get home I would be wiped and I would feel te pressures of financial issues and I worked hard for a month and half to get my life back to were it was I do appreciate the little things she did I would always think to myself I'm lucky to have her but I just didn't show it I was drained that's when little arguments would happen Link to post Share on other sites
WTRanger Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 Stress in any form is never a good reason for a break/break-up/break down in communication/ or anything else. Stress is just a weak-ass excuse. If you really cared or they really cared, stress would not get in the way. The two of you would deal with the stress together, not individually. The fact is, stress happens every day of your life. You cannot ever get rid of it. You can either deal with it like an adult and deal with it like a couple, or you can use it as an excuse. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 Stress in any form is never a good reason for a break/break-up/break down in communication/ or anything else. Stress is just a weak-ass excuse. If you really cared or they really cared, stress would not get in the way. The two of you would deal with the stress together, not individually. The fact is, stress happens every day of your life. You cannot ever get rid of it. You can either deal with it like an adult and deal with it like a couple, or you can use it as an excuse. She never mentioned stress prior to the break up she mentioned university is going to different an she's nervous so u assumed that one of the factors I guess not if you put it like that I will send her a text or give her a phone call and see where we end up everybody needs space and I had more than enough let's see if I can get her back Link to post Share on other sites
WTRanger Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 It doesn't matter when she mentioned stress. That's not a good reason or a good sign. You've mentioned in more than one post that she's claiming stress as a reason. Even if she deals with stress by shutting down, that's not good either. That puts you in a tough spot having to decided to push her to open up which will make you seem clingy, or back away which could make you seem like you don't care. When your communication breaks down, everything breaks down. Stop typing on your iPhone too, it makes it tough to read your half sentences with zero punctuation. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 It doesn't matter when she mentioned stress. That's not a good reason or a good sign. You've mentioned in more than one post that she's claiming stress as a reason. Even if she deals with stress by shutting down, that's not good either. That puts you in a tough spot having to decided to push her to open up which will make you seem clingy, or back away which could make you seem like you don't care. When your communication breaks down, everything breaks down. Stop typing on your iPhone too, it makes it tough to read your half sentences with zero punctuation. That's what I did I tried to get to open up I couldn't she shut me out for whatever reasons so I pulled away been 3 weeks now I'm going to try open her up one more time Link to post Share on other sites
WTRanger Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 I wish you luck, but 3 weeks may not be enough time. When people shut down, then can shut down for a long time. If she doesn't respond, you need pull back completely and cease all future attempts. Do not keep chasing her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 21, 2010 Author Share Posted October 21, 2010 I wish you luck, but 3 weeks may not be enough time. When people shut down, then can shut down for a long time. If she doesn't respond, you need pull back completely and cease all future attempts. Do not keep chasing her. That's the plan... During the break up I told her "I'm not going to wait" till I realized everything that had gone down I want her to know I'm still around 3 been 5 weeks but I contacted twice the first two weeks She also said "I derserse better than what she can give right now" Wtfff is that? Link to post Share on other sites
theone11 Posted October 21, 2010 Share Posted October 21, 2010 I'm in the same boat man it sucks! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hhhh Posted October 22, 2010 Author Share Posted October 22, 2010 I'm in the same boat man it sucks! Loll I'm keeping busy it helps... What's your situations Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts