Time Difference and Comunication Issues

[Xelha]

My bf and I have been together for almost 2 years now, and he's still going strong, but I'm beginning to have a lot of trouble with it.

 

I think one of the biggest problems for me is the time difference. I'm in Canada and he's in Spain, so there's a difference of 6 hours. An ideal time for me to go online is 10pm or so, the earliest being 8. I used to spend a lot more of my time online, but then it started interfering with my productivity, and so now it just really bothers me to come online before a certain hour. I start to feel like I've wasted so much time, and that I've missed an opportunity to go out and do something. My guilty conscience just doesn't leave me alone anymore.

 

If I wait until that time, however, my bf would be long gone. He almost never is online after 6pm my time(he has this thing where his internet shuts off at midnight)... his ideal time is 4 or 5pm my time. It's very difficult for me, though, because that's around the time I have supper and go out places. >_>

 

So basically, it's really hard for us to find time to talk(making schedules is really hard because our lives are inconsistent). We end up talking maybe once every few days, and our talks feel somehow so empty. He'll be tired and getting ready for bed, while I'm alert but don't really have much to talk about. I realized that one major way to improve our communication would be to talk on Skype more often, but we have really bad luck with it, and most of the time the picture/audio are really bad quality, pretty much to the point that typing is preferred.

 

I just feel a lack of connection with my bf these days and I don't know what to do about it...

[skydiveaddict]

Don't let the time difference get in your way. You can make it work. It's not that big of a deal. I've said this before but it bears repeating in your case: while we were in Afghanistan, most of the guys in my unit would wait weeks just to send ONE email or get a short conversation (five minutes or less usually) to their wives or girlfriends. If you want to make it work, you can. I'm sorry if I sound harsh or uncaring, but there are a lot of guys who are WAY worse off than you.

Edited October 22, 2010 by skydiveaddict

[Els]

If I were you, I would try to suss out the source of the poor skype quality. Skype is generally a very robust program, and will be able to sustain call quality in network connections so bad that other programs would have trouble. So if your skype is always that bad, there is something wrong with either one or both of your connections. Consider changing to a higher-bandwidth broadband provider, or switching providers, or changing settings in your modem/router to give the Skype application priority.

 

Can't help with the time differences, sorry. I have had that in the past as well, and there have been occasions where I gave up going out to stay on Skype (for example, if I'd been going out for the past few days already), as well as the other way round. It's just a delicate balance and you have to tread it.