Good places to meet relationship-minded men age 35-40?

[Ruby Slippers]

I can set you up if you want me to.

haha With skydiveaddict, or just in general?

 

Philosophy Groups.

Great idea! I would love this!! I watch philosophy-oriented documentaries and interviews for fun all the time.

[Disillusioned]

That's the problem, commitment-minded guys 35-40 are either extremely rare or else they've become discouraged and bitter and they're no longer looking.

 

However, my career has skyrocketed this year (amazing how much one can get done without a lover in her life), and it takes up most of my time.

 

That right there is a red flag. Men nowadays have started wising up, fast... they read "woman + career" and think "snob". I don't know of any man who earned less than his female partner and she didn't dump him like an empty beer can.

 

very good-looking men who seem to want just sex, and guys who seem to want a relationship but have issues of the emotional or social ilk that are too significant to ignore.

 

This is the real world!

 

So. Where are some good places to meet smart, stable, relationship-desiring men around ages 35-40?

 

The biggest turn-on for me is intelligence. But he has to be socially adept as well. I always click well with slightly nerdy but socially well-adjusted science guys. Looks are not at the top of the list for me. I see beauty in pretty much everyone. Much more important is that he is loyal, solid, affectionate, sensual, and that we have a passionate connection.

 

I have never done online dating, and I'm not drawn to the idea. I would strongly prefer to meet men the natural way.

 

So fellas, where am I likely to find you?

 

More than likely, you're going to have to start knocking on doors, because the men you describe have all but given up on finding decent women. That, or go overseas.

[tigressA]

Hmmm. So what do you suggest I do?

 

I have NEVER approached a man. I have always let them come to me.

 

If you see a man who catches your interest, make eye contact and smile. That's a pretty obvious signal.

[johan]

My house is a pretty good place.

[Ruby Slippers]

That right there is a red flag. Men nowadays have started wising up, fast... they read "woman + career" and think "snob". I don't know of any man who earned less than his female partner and she didn't dump him like an empty beer can.

I've never earned more than my guy (not because they made a ton, but because I chose moderate-paying work I loved over high-paying work I didn't), but I don't think I would care about this.

 

Money is meaningless. It is just a tool. Like a hammer or a roll of masking tape.

 

Real love is the meaning of life!

 

In my book, one has nothing to do with the other.

 

carhill mentioned physical laborer men above. I would happily love a home builder, a carpenter, a craftsman. These guys are the salt of the earth. I imagine they have a strong grasp on what really matters in life -- as many of the pampered yuppie guys I work with do NOT. (And I'm sure they are very in touch with their bodies and can really throw down in the sack. )

 

But I think you may have brought to light another reason 20-something men are so appealing. They think it's awesome if you are doing well in your career and are earning good money, and love to root you on. Men around my age who have similar earning power can seem awed but also threatened, which is a pity.

 

The way I see it, me making more money just alleviates some earning pressure from him and gives us more freedom to have a blast together.

[Woggle]

In general.

[Ruby Slippers]

Wouldn't it be funny if you ended up setting me up with this totally great guy? lol

[Woggle]

Wouldn't it be funny if you ended up setting me up with this totally great guy? lol

 

Next time you have some time off come down to New Jersey.

[9Lives]

prison would be a good place to start

 

Lmao...I swear I'm not surprised u said that alphamale. U a mess!

[Feelin Frisky]

Ruby, you speak of business quite often. Does it allow you to represent it at trade shows or conferences? Trade shows and conferences bring persons of ambition and substance together. Wearing a name tag and doing some public speaking makes a person accessible. Other than this I have only encoutered one other place to meet someone on the grounds of smarts and purpose--in adult education be it in advancing degree or continuing ed courses. It's hard to find someone so, perhaps the best investment is to live a professional life where you give routinely give yourself the chance to admired and found too. Never cease looking but also be taking chances to be found. Good luck.

[Stung]

Cracker Jack, I live in Chicago. I totally love this city, too.

 

 

I guess I am just going to have to make socializing a priority if I want to meet a cool guy.

 

 

That took me aback, Ruby, because I could have sworn you lived in San Francisco. Am I going senile already?

 

FWIW, I did meet my husband online when he was 35, and I met a few other cool guys that way too. But before that, I met most of my serious boyfriends through continuing education night classes or through work events or through social networking, friends and colleagues of friends, etc. I have also met very interesting men at scientific seminars/lectures or at book readings, although I did have to weed through some humorless crowds to get to them .

[Surrealist]

That's the problem, commitment-minded guys 35-40 are either extremely rare or else they've become discouraged and bitter and they're no longer looking.

 

 

More than likely, you're going to have to start knocking on doors, because the men you describe have all but given up on finding decent women.

 

Lot of truth to this unfortunately, very much the way I feel. Not really bitter though, but discouraged and disappointed.

[bac]

Perhaps, a trip to Europe, tennis clubs, tango classes.