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What could I possibly do for him?


fragileone

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I love my father more than anything else in life on earth. He has severe arthritis, and his joints are fused and distorted. Everyday I have to see the person I truly love SUFFER from chronic pain. He hides it from me the best he can but i know it's there, and there is nothing I can do about it and it hurts me so much. I wish I could take his pain.

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Have you tried asking him what might help? Is his pain being adequately medicated? Have you tried every medical and alternative approach for him? Would distraction (like reading, head rubs, music) help? How about palliative measures like heating pads, hot tubs, spiritual healing, meditation?

 

Even just being near him helps, I am sure. Many people suffer alone, with no one to care. Your dad has you, and I know that that is at least some comfort.

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he takes medication, and uses humor to alleviate the pain.

I guess i just feel inadequate.... next to him and all his wisdom, strength, willpower, sence of humor.....i feel inferior. I just wish he had a daughter he could truly be proud of.

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Ahhh, fragileone, why on earth do you feel he can't be proud of you? I am sure he is. I recommend that you talk this over with him, and get the reassurance I know he will provide. I am sure you will learn something that suprises you pleasantly. Don't wait, no one knows what the future holds. You may not have as many chances to talk to him ahead of you as you might hope.

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Fragileone, your father IS proud of you - never doubt it. I have been taking care of my severely disabled mother for 7 years now and there have been times I wanted to collapse because no matter what I did, I could never really make things "better" for her. Your love and caring speak volumes, and they are speaking especially to your father. Be strong, and keep the faith.

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