PLEASE help!

[Lovesick]

I have a good male friend, I'll call him "Bob". I have been friends with Bob for a few weeks. We met through mutal friends. We talka lot and I feel that we connect well. We are attracted to each other, but neither one of us wants a relationship right now. We hang out, and do mess around a little. We are both happy w/ this. But I think I am falling in Love. I don't need a committment, i think this is a good feeling and am not really concerned about a relationship. He asked me to spend the night a few nights ago. I did and had a wonderful time. Bob said he wanted to see me at least once this week. I e-mailed him yesterday morning with a suggestion, asking if it was a good time for him. We usually e-mail often, a few times a day. I know he has read my e-mail but he hasn't answered. I fear he may be blowing me off. What should I do? Talk to him? Forget about him? I don't want to lose his friendship. I am afraid I will scare him off if I tell him how I feel. HELP!!!!

[Taressa]

Ooh, this can be such an unsure time; balanced somewhere between love and friendship.

 

Look at your communication as a game of catch:

 

He tossed the initial ball by saying he wanted to see you;

 

You tossed it back yesterday with your email response.

 

He's holding the ball now.

 

In non-sports language, now:

 

Either your friend is too busy to respond or he may be having a small case of cold feet.

 

These friends-with-benefits relationships can get out of hand and grow into a one-sided love relationship. Use this time to think through what you desire and hope for in the relationship. Allow him the freedom and time to think it through also.

 

If you hold off and don't initiate the next move, I believe he'll come around and call you. Phoning or emailing him again at this point could come across as a weakness - - being too needy or pushy. So give him space and let him get thirsty for you again.

 

If he doesn't call you soon it may be best to end the relationship and seek out a man who respects and likes you enough to give you time and honesty. Hopefully, "Bob" will come around soon. If not, hold your head high and march on with your life.