In love with another person but have girlfriend

[noel]

well here it goes I have never posted anything like this so Im trying something new. First of all I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for three years, and or relationship is just one big argument after another. And I dont know what to do about it.

 

This other woman is so great that I cant keep her out of my mind, she has begged me to come be with her so that I can get the treatment I deserve. I would love to do just that but I dont know how I would explain it to my girlfriend now.

 

How do you tell someone you are not in love with them anymore, and we should see other people with starting a argument.

 

HELP!!!

[Nina]

Let me ask you this...how many relationships have you been in? The reason I ask is this: beginnings are always great. You're discovering new things about a new person that amze you, you have a lot to talk about, a whole pervious life to share with your new love.

 

With someone you've been involved with for a long time, it's different. You have to deal with the mundane things, it's hard to keep passion and interest alive.

 

All I'm saying is that there's a good chance the same thing that's happening with your current girlfriend will probably eventually happen in every relationship you get into. Sometimes it happens quickly, other times it may take years. But I may be writing to deaf ears because the first blush of love tends to override the logical parts of the human brain.

 

If you're unhappy, leave your girlfriend. It's not fair to her to be tied to someone who dilikes her. But just know you're taking the easy route because arguing all the time is a sign of a communication problem. This is something easily fixed, but also something that will follow youthroughout your life until you learn how to communicate honestly. And know that thi will probably not be an easy breakup because of the communication problems that already exist.

[belin]

hi i don't think that you are in love with the other girl,

 

but you are in loved to be loved. so take your time to think about it and try to have contact with the new one and follow up your feeling. Don't pretend to your gf so i know i have been throuth. it hearts a lot and your gf will start to feel between love and hate, so it will end very bad for you. Before you start with another woman it is better to end first what you have.

[Taressa]

Hi Noel,

 

Even salt tastes sweet if you're swimming in vinegar. The new woman fulfills your need to feel of worth; the old girlfriend is tearing you down. Get rid of the old, take some time off, then see if the new woman is still the sweetness you desire.

 

Before you move into a new relationship try to find ways to set boundaries in your relationship. You'll need a good set of communications tools so you can protect the things most important to you: your self-esteem, your values, your time. Make sure the next girlfriend is one who can accept the word "no" from you.

 

TODAY, talk with your current girlfriend and tell her you want to end the relationship. Honesty is the best policy. Be firm and use gentle words because there are two hearts involved in this relationship. A bad ending will be a stumbling block to you in the future so do your best to leave kindly but swiftly.

 

Keep the friendship going with this new woman. If she cares for you she will wait while you work through the feelings that come in when a relationship ends. Try to keep your wits about you so you don't use this nice woman as a rebound relationship. Love waits and is not desperate.

 

I'm glad you've come to the point where you're ready to make a change. Life can be better for both of you.