Awarth Posted September 3, 2012 Share Posted September 3, 2012 my ex-gf got gigs and it had been one year since she break up with me for another guy..b4 that we are tgt for 5 yrs...she is now 23 yrd old lately, she had been showing some weird signs.. things like: 1) call me out of nowhere 2) telling me how badly her boyfriend had treated her 3) saying how good i am 4) say she will never believe that she will find someone as good as me again 5) say she could not picture a future with that guy..even went on to say that even if the two of them get married, they will get divorced very quick 6) telling me that she feel really comfortable talking to me 7) telling me that she feel so stress talking to her bf..cause they will quarrel within a few sentences 8) asking me why i did not beg her back when she leave me 9) suggesting we should go on a trip together, even hinting that she will come back.. 10) saying that whoever lucky enough to be my gf will be the luckiest woman on earth.. 11) ask me if she break up with that guy, will i come back to her (i just answer "maybe" by the way) and so on..but she is still with that boyfriend of hers now.. so..i am not trying to hope or anything..but is this her finally starting to find out that the "grass is not greener on the other side?" thanks everyone.. Link to post Share on other sites
Hobbit Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 Im still trying to work out if this is the case in my BU, or if its just bog standard ILYB... / She says she loves me but is not in love with me / She wants to remain friends / She sees no future with us / She wants to discover herself / She says that there is no-one else however I have suspicions / Has kept her feelings of unhappiness to herself for months Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
wsr Posted September 5, 2012 Share Posted September 5, 2012 my ex girlfriend left me 3 months ago, we have had little contact in between. For the first month she facebook messaged me a few times, but that fizzed out. After that we had about a month off, we ended up going to this event with different friends and bumped into each other, it was awkward and we spoke for about 30 seconds. I text her the next day and asked if she wanted to meet up, she said no, not at the moment. So I left it until about 3 weeks ago. Its been driving me nuts so I wrote her a letter and dropped it off round hers, 24 hours later I get one message back from her by text saying she thought it was sweet but she was really happy. Crushed me that did, so I just said I loved her and hoped she wouldn't forget me. Flash forward a week and my mate has been talking to her, basically I was the topic of conversation and she found out alot of what I have been up to. My friend passed on some fairly insensitive stuff, saying she was happier on her own doing her own thing and all that. This episode has destroyed me as the man I was. We were together for 3 years and now she treats me like this ghost. All I hear all the time is how happy she is. Every time I hear that it kills me. We were a very happy couple and argued once which lead to the break up. We had a sex less relationship which I learned to deal with due to her aniexty issues, I was willing to wait. I waited then she dumps me because she wants to be on her own. I love her unconditionally. I invested so much of myself into this and it feels terrible to be treated like A. you don't exist, B. our relationship didn't mean anything. She has started to go out partying alot by all accounts and is enjoying herself without me in her life. She never did this before hand and often said she didnt like that sort of thing. She has a mate of a similar age who is doing the same thing, going out all the time, dumped her boyfriend and live in a bigger town! She is 21 and im 25. I feel like a complete failure Link to post Share on other sites
wsr Posted September 6, 2012 Share Posted September 6, 2012 Ah good news, after three months she has now told me that she is seeing someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
Brian4 Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 I feel like you were actually there with my ex when she broke the news to me. Reading this definitely brought about some clarity, but it hurts like hell reading this thinking that she actual may feel than there's something better than what I can give her Link to post Share on other sites
Sunslides Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 How strange!!! I was reading a post here and then, a message appears from her in a popup message at 10:15 am. She has a new guy, she pick him up a few days after we broke up. She definitively has the GIGS. I cannot be entirely sure she is still with this new guy... Anyway, she asked how was my daughter and said she hoped I was doing ok. I decided to respond ( I probably should have not!!!) . I said she was fine and how are you? I sent it at 2:30 pm. Nothing since. Why would she email me? She dumped me. Is she now seiing that GIGS is not always a good thing? Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
wsr Posted September 7, 2012 Share Posted September 7, 2012 Im devastated by this news. All I can think of is him with her. I do not know who it is and she won't tell me. I don't really think its GIGS, in fact i doubt we can really call it that at all. We have had three months apart, she has found someone else, its clearly too long to be just a rebound. its the real deal and she came out and said it to me, if it was just a rebound, A. it would of happened sooner, B. she wouldn't of told me. She just came out and said it on facebook in a pvt message, I flipped and deleted her off facebook instantly and she got the arse with me about that calling me immature. It was actually nice to she her rise. I then argued with her on text, essentially to myself as she stopped replying. I told her I was sorry that I was never good enough for her and I hope this new guy treats her with respect. I then told her to bin my stuff. Im sick of it, im actually becoming mentally ill about it. To be honest GIGS, is just a coping mechanism. It builds false hope and its unhealthy. Im sick of people telling me to get over her, I try that but every 15 seconds she is back in my head ****ing this other guy after i waited 3 years. It kills me Link to post Share on other sites
NavyAirTraffic Posted October 3, 2012 Share Posted October 3, 2012 Im devastated by this news. All I can think of is him with her. I do not know who it is and she won't tell me. I don't really think its GIGS, in fact i doubt we can really call it that at all. We have had three months apart, she has found someone else, its clearly too long to be just a rebound. its the real deal and she came out and said it to me, if it was just a rebound, A. it would of happened sooner, B. she wouldn't of told me. She just came out and said it on facebook in a pvt message, I flipped and deleted her off facebook instantly and she got the arse with me about that calling me immature. It was actually nice to she her rise. I then argued with her on text, essentially to myself as she stopped replying. I told her I was sorry that I was never good enough for her and I hope this new guy treats her with respect. I then told her to bin my stuff. Im sick of it, im actually becoming mentally ill about it. To be honest GIGS, is just a coping mechanism. It builds false hope and its unhealthy. Im sick of people telling me to get over her, I try that but every 15 seconds she is back in my head ****ing this other guy after i waited 3 years. It kills me Not a coping mechanism, it's a realization that it's over!! The only rule is: let them go, completely remove yourself from their lives, don't respond to anything. The only hope he gives is after 1-3 years there might be a chance they return if you follow the first rule. Who wants to wait for that long for someone who rejected them no matter the reason?? Mine just left me, she acted and I felt as though I was in the most perfect relationship until the day she left me. After kissing me and telling me I was amazing, she texted me it was over 4 hours later and 1 week later she's on a dating site. I promise I never saw any signs of this happening, she was loving and then it stopped in what seems like seconds. There is simply nothing we can do, no magic words to say, they've made up their mind!!! I'm fighting tears as I write this but we all know the best thing is to save some face and begin the long painful road of moving on. There simply is no alternative, if there is I haven't heard it. Link to post Share on other sites
bluefairy812 Posted October 3, 2012 Share Posted October 3, 2012 Im still trying to work out if this is the case in my BU, or if its just bog standard ILYB... / She says she loves me but is not in love with me / She wants to remain friends / She sees no future with us / She wants to discover herself / She says that there is no-one else however I have suspicions / Has kept her feelings of unhappiness to herself for months Thoughts? this is exactlyyyyyyyyyyyyy to the T what my ex told me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not sure if its GIGS or simply he wants someone else. idk. Link to post Share on other sites
antelope82 Posted October 11, 2012 Share Posted October 11, 2012 (edited) i just wanted to post because the signs of this "theory" is so accurate in my relationship, or should i say, past-relationship with my ex-gf/fiance-to-be. I posted my story a while ago but long story short, knew girl for 11 years, dated her for over 2 and lived together almost the entire time and we were going to get engaged and picked and purchased rings together and then she broke up with me. after a few months of rollercoaster and some periods of no contact, limited contact, sleeping together, etc... and lots of emotional baggage to go along with it, i am seeing how much she's changed as a person. She's NOT THE SAME GIRL I KNEW AT ALL. She's doing everything she said she didn't like about certain other girls, and doing everything she said she'd never do, and doing things not like her at all. She's just... not the girl I'd want to date, ever, now. And I know this because I've kept in some contact with her (which I do not recommend but in my circumstance, it was needed for the time being). Today I hung out with her and my roommate for dinner and she said a lot of things that really surprised me about relationships and dating in general. And it's just not like her at all. I texted her later asking "what happened to your self respect and what happened to the girl i used to know?" She replied, "She gone." She even said her coworkers said she's lowering herself but she doesnt care. I told her she's setting herself up for disaster but she doesn't get it. This all just gave me more incentive to not care. She's no longer attractive to me anymore. It was a long road to get it here, but this is it. Pretty sad actually, IMHO. PS. She still randomly calls me "baby", "honey", etc. and she will completely at random tell me things to try to lead me on but I've been saying, "WTF?" and stuff like that to her immediately. i.e. she brought up how the engagement ring we got would be better with a diamond, or ask if there were regrets, or just stare sadly in the mirror at both of us. or just random flirty moves or crap like that. I suggest NC if at all possible. Avoid these rollercoasters. They're inevitable either way, but its easier and faster without them in your picture. Edited October 11, 2012 by antelope82 Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 11, 2012 Share Posted October 11, 2012 Im still trying to work out if this is the case in my BU, or if its just bog standard ILYB... / She says she loves me but is not in love with me / She wants to remain friends / She sees no future with us / She wants to discover herself / She says that there is no-one else however I have suspicions / Has kept her feelings of unhappiness to herself for months Thoughts? Ex told me pretty much almost all of the above, plus or minus a few things (he didn't say he wants to discover himself). A few things he said : -he's too selfish to love me the way I want/need him to. -he wants to stay friends and do a FWB. -he loves me as a really good friend, doesn't feel like we are lovers, doesn't feel the 'spark' -too early to tell if he has other feelings for me. -long distance means can't do full-relationship. -he won't go out with other women or hit on other women (yeah right, says the guy who wanted me to do a threesome with another girl and who goes to Thailand 4x a year and hangs out with prostitutes there) and we would hang out when he came to my city on business (basically wants part-time ****-buddy/girlfriend -- and by girlfriend i mean , a friend who happens to be a girl ). I do think that it is partly GIGS, and partly wanting to have his cake and eat it too -- wants the sex but not the baggage of a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
nala.x Posted October 11, 2012 Share Posted October 11, 2012 My situation is similar, my boyfriend left me a month ago. We dated for almost a year. Him and his ex started talking, then out of nowhere he broke up with me. But he is blaming me! He says we were fighting a lot, and I was too insecure (i was insecure about his ex!!) And then 2 weeks later he began dating this ex! But still tells me I shouldnt be insecure. Is he stupid? When they were dating, she was so insecure, up to the point where she wouldnt let him go out with his mates, wouldnt let him play sport if there was a girl on the team, and would block people on his facebook. So why does he think the grass is greener with her? As much as im trying to get over it, Im just hoping that they start arguing again and he realises that it was a mistake to let me go. I would never ever take him back though, id just like to watch him suffer. Or I may be wrong and theyre just meant to be together Link to post Share on other sites
irish31 Posted October 17, 2012 Share Posted October 17, 2012 Gigs - a young, immature male/female confusing butterflies and excitement for love and hapiness due to lack of life expirience... i think im pretty close Link to post Share on other sites
totty101 Posted October 18, 2012 Share Posted October 18, 2012 This is all crazy lol. I get that someone with G.I.G.S. is a confusing time for any persons life. I've been on both sides and yes, it is extremely hard on both parties. Even though I did not want to hurt the woman i was with I still was not man enough to break it off with them. I WAS BEING VERY SELFISH.....bottom line. There is no excuse for straying along behind your girlfriends back and not cutting it off with her. I eventually came clean with her and she cut if off with me. Well guess what, we did get back together a few months later and it was better than before. Homebrew does have some good points. I was also on the other end where she strayed on me and was flat out cheating.....I cut her loose. Well guess what again, within in a week she realized it was not greener and came running back. It was the worst pain I've ever felt. It still to this day hurts me just as much as it did the day I busted her. My personal opinion is even though you may have the "G.I.G.S." that is still no reason to drag someone along. You may be confused and that's ok to be but you do not cheat. Very very selfish. It will hurt the person less to say "hey, I am confused about what I want and I don't want to drag you along just to hurt you more. I need sometime to figure out what is going on with me but I encourage you to move on" than your partner to find out you have been cheat or have the "G.I.G.S." and have been wondering. After that, it's up to the dumpee to accept it and like Homebrew said, if they really love them, let them go so they can sort things out. That's my 2 cents or what it's worth:cool: Link to post Share on other sites
whatisshethinking Posted October 21, 2012 Share Posted October 21, 2012 (edited) My ex and I were together for 3 1/2 years. She did all the normal out of nowhere stuff like picking fights, complaining about the tiny things, being difficult etc for about the last 2 weeks. Turns out, she went out for a work function and somebody kept hitting on her thoughout the night. She gave him her phone number and continued calling and texting and even hanging out with him and all her all of a sudden newfound "friends" that she conveniently met. Two weeks of this went by and she broke up with me, and that night she went out with him. She did all the lying and saying things like "i love you but etc", "i'm going out with my friends" (who never existed in the previous 3.5 years) etc etc. She kept calling me, texting me, showing up on my doorstep, asking me to dinner etc etc to keep me close by. I kept accusing her of seeing someone, she denied it wholeheartedly for the next 2 months. She was always extremely honest and never ever lied or cheated. And I did not want the breakup as we were just talking about marriage. So I gave her the 1% chance of being truthful because she was so convincing which included crying etc. She then showed up with him one day to an event where she knew I would be, Kissed the guy right in front of me (she didn't see me), I blew my top, called her every name in the book, called her a liar etc etc. She still insisted they were just friends on and on. 5 days later she MARRIED this part time job having beach comber (he's 30 btw) just to keep him in the country as his visa was to expire the following day and he was going to have to go back to England. I found that out from another person. That person actually asked her if she was going to call me and tell me that she got married and her response was, "Not after the way he spoke to me!", as if I was the one who did something wrong. This was a year ago, when I got that news I moved out of state and have been here since. I recently had to go home for a funeral and was given some news on her. Believe me, I did not ask. According to her sister and her mother, she is not any happier and is beginning to show more and more signs of the butterflies wearing off. In fact, she doesn't even talk to her mother anymore than she has to. She used to talk to her every day. She hardly shows her face and her 'husband' hasn't been seen in months either. Oh and another fine quote from her was 'We only got married so we could date', which btw was a felony. This was an unbelievably honest person. I had no idea who the he!! this person was and to this day, her own family doesn't recognize her. I have been back there on business a few times in the last year and each time she has conveniently tried to 'bump into' me while there. She caught me the first time where I just said hi and bye, but since then I have always had the feeling that she would do it again. Sure enough, each time she has come looking for me but this time I always made sure I left earlier not giving her the opportunity to 'bump' into me again. Keep in mind, that these are places that she hasn't been in months since we broke up. To conveniently show up on exactly the same dates and times each time is exponentially improbable. I have been out on dates since, but haven't met anybody with any spark etc. So I am still single. The part about this that really really really sucks is that I still miss her despite what she did to me. And I am moving back in the next 2 months for my business. And the part that's even worse than that is that she didn't exactly start looking around simply because of me. I had a very stressful, very very stressful life because of my work schedule. I was working over 100 hours per week for over 3 years. She was bored but I did love her very much, and I think I still do. But I couldn't be there for her because of pending bankruptcy and other contract obligations so my hands were tied until the end of October of last year. So she left because of outside factors causing stress on our RS and it just got to a point where she couldn't take it anymore. Part of me doesn't blame her, I just blame her for how she handled it. I even told her that I don't blame her for breaking up with me. I have very big suspicions that when I go back, she will look for me again because of her doing this each time I have been back. I am no longer in that stressful situation, I am actually in a much better place. I've lost 25 pounds, hit the gym, gotten into pretty good shape, only work 40 hours per week and am now financially stable. I look good. I took care of me and my problems, I have grown from this. But I still hold a place for her in my heart. Am I absolutely nuts for even thinking of the possibility of an RC? When is it an absolute "NO" and when is it a "MAYBE" regarding at least a shot at an RC? Outside forces of my work drove us apart. That is the only reason I would give us another shot if I got one. Otherwise, I wouldn't even think about it. Edited October 21, 2012 by whatisshethinking Link to post Share on other sites
Canada123 Posted November 5, 2012 Share Posted November 5, 2012 If someone is going through this with their ex should they just show them this forum so the themselves realize what they are doing Link to post Share on other sites
CptSaveAho Posted November 5, 2012 Share Posted November 5, 2012 (edited) Nope, First rule about GIGS club, dont talk about GIGS to an ex... They wont know, understand, care, etc and think you are trying to manipulate them. Best thing to do is end the relationship and move forward Edited November 5, 2012 by CptSaveAho Link to post Share on other sites
nat5 Posted November 5, 2012 Share Posted November 5, 2012 Im not sure whether my ex is going through this... we were each others first loves and both 20 been together 4.5 years, lived together for 2.5 years. We were happy, rarely argued and have ended things on good terms. He broke up with me just over a month ago, he broke up withme on the monday evening, but the monday morning we had up a joint svings account, to start saving for our own place. He tried to say love me but wasnt in love with me, wanted to spend more time with friends, and he was stressed out with work. A week later i found out he was seeing a 17 year old girl from hes work, she had started working there four weeks before. So i started NC when i found out about this girl, i didnt have my ex on facebook but i still had his mom. One day a guy commeneted on one of my pictures, that night 12 o'clock at night my ex turned up angry asking who it was, bearing in mind he was the one in a new relstionship. We spoke for 3 hours and he told me how this girl wasnt me, little things annoyed him, she was loud clingy and just the opposite of me. He then went home to think and came back the next day saying he really loved me, hed finished with the girl and wanted to sort us out and make us work. I was so happy. That lasted two days! Then he said he felt bad for this girl and still had feelings for her. She had told my ex she loved him (They'd been together two weeks) she had also not long come out of a long relationship, but her ex had cheated on her. but he told me he still loved me alot, he said that when we were together it felt so right but when we werent it didnt feel right. In the last text he sent me said 'im going to delete your number now, bye, ill speak to you soon xx'. What does that mean? I dropped the rest of his stuff to his moms last week, she told me that my ex had said there was still a strong connection between us, she said he was asking about soul mates. She said she had asked him what he'll do when i meet someone else, because of how he acted to the comment on facebook, he said he wouldnt have to deal with that for a long time as i still love him and wont get over him that easily. Will he make it work with this girl because everyone can see shes not his type, his mom said he keeps saying you dont want me to be with her and you want me to go back, she says i just think your making a mistake. Also he told me things that werent right about this girl. So im not sure if this is 'grass is greener'? Link to post Share on other sites
Canada123 Posted November 5, 2012 Share Posted November 5, 2012 well heres m story ive been with this girl since we were in highschool been dating for almost 3 years everything was awesome. were both 20 to add , we always said how lucky we were to have found eachother so soon. long story short talked about marriage kids names went on trips to mexico everything. she lives in london now she goes to school there this is her 3rd year and we have been dating since high school. we were in a little rut for 2 months were it didnt feel the same between us we still talked everyday but just felt like something changed. i worked a very hard job so me going up on the weekends was hard so i never did. and when there was time she was busy. needless to say she broke up with me over a text without warning or wanting to talk. she came home for thanksgiving and we talked and she was dead set were done she felt like i didnt love her and that it was to late. i tried chasing her for a couple days then stopped all contact because she said she wanted space. week and a bit go by so i text her when i can get my stuff. ended up going up there a month later to get my stuff i was walking out to leave and she started crying asking me if i was going to stay i said idk i feel like im invading your space. she wanted me to stay we talked and still she insisted she's not ready. when we were together it was like we were never apart we had sex and that was great we laughed and talked like nothing happened. she asked me to sleep over so i did because it was late and i had a long drive home. i was goign to sleep on the couch but she again insisted i slept with her. in the morning i looked at her phone and shes been hanging out and cuddling with some new guy and they even kissed. i dont really care that much like it hurts but the worst part was she lied to me right to my face when i asked her if there was anyone else. she kept telling me she wants me to find someone else and to experience other poeple out there but the thing is i already have. i was her first love and first to have sex with her. so right now i think she's going through this G.I.G stage. she tells me she loves me and hates seeing me sad. i asked her if theres hope cuz i dont want to be the dummy to sit around while she tests the waters and realizes it wasnt that bad. all of her girlfriends just broke up with their boyfriends to which dosent really help and shes been partying a lot. she still has all the pictures of us on facebook and all the captions saying my love and what not which dosent make sense. so i just deleted her completely and shortly after she tried adding me back twice and says that she can't have me completely out of her life. i havent responded yet im not sure what i should say to her i know she still loves me when i was with her she kept saying how easy it was and she told me she loves me so thats why this is so hard. any help would be great thanks in advanced sorry for the rants Link to post Share on other sites
Canada123 Posted November 6, 2012 Share Posted November 6, 2012 i have one more question what if after this whole G.I.G process your ex comes back and he/she didnt sleep with any other people. they just partied, flirted and maybe kissed other people. then what is it up to the individual to make the decision if they can trust them again or should they not give them another chance? Link to post Share on other sites
Tmo2 Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 (edited) "The Grass Is Greener" Syndrome (AKA; itchy feet, quarter life crisis, early-twenty-itus) • Reasons for the break up are contradicting or sound like the dumper is grasping at straws for reasons. As if they are trying to convince themselves of it, too. • Not much warning that something is going on before the actual break. • An extreme change in lifestyle, such as suddenly starting to drink a lot, party a lot and hang around people they normally wouldn't. • Wishy-washiness on the part of the dumper. They love you, but aren't IN love with you. They say that this doesn't mean you two are over forever and maybe someday down the road you'll be together again. At the same time, they'll tell you to move on. • Quickly entering new relationships with people they aren't very compatible with. Good luck, everyone. Wow this is exactly what happened to me (dumpee). This happened after 2.5 years and while I was at my lowest. When we met I was clean, in shape, independant and had ambitions. When she dumped me I was smoking pot, stopped working, playing video games, Lost my dreams and ambition (probably the worst). I was going no where and had nothing to offer to the couple except neediness... NC has started 1 week ago after 2-3 weeks of trying to convince her. She is flirting with a new co-worker and has showed every point quoted up top.. It has been 1 month since the BU and I have refound myself, I cut the crap out of my life and am now much more mature. She is 23 and I am 24 today. I was her first boyfriend and lover. I aint completly over her and I ponder if she will return. I guess I will have to forget her for now'' Edited November 14, 2012 by Tmo2 Link to post Share on other sites
CptSaveAho Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 i have one more question what if after this whole G.I.G process your ex comes back and he/she didnt sleep with any other people. they just partied, flirted and maybe kissed other people. then what is it up to the individual to make the decision if they can trust them again or should they not give them another chance? Then they aren't done... send them back into GIGs land Link to post Share on other sites
Tiwala Posted November 15, 2012 Share Posted November 15, 2012 (edited) I'm a bit younger (18) but this describes my situation almost perfectly... with me as the dumper ): I nearly drove myself crazy for a few weeks trying to find a reason to explain my contradictory feelings.. and then I found this. I think I "have GIGS"- I think I'm looking for a something I need to complete in my life, and for whatever unfortunate reason, it can't be done while I'm in a relationship with a seemingly very good guy. Homebrew, you said this "syndrome" usually happens to those who basically missed out on a lot- 'people that didn’t date around, people that did not have a lot “life experiences” growing up' and that sounds like me. I was the "sheltered child" at my school, I wasn't allowed to be in an exclusive relationship, I wasn't allowed to be physical with boys. So, naturally, most boys stayed away. I mean, who really wants to hear a 2 hour lecture for his date's father about why teens shouldn't be exclusive? I didn't spend that much time just having fun with my friends, I never partied, never drank.. But I got pretty serious with one guy anyway (senior year), and I still think it was one of the best choices I've ever made. I learned so much about myself, and about emotions, and well.. physical things, and we really really liked each other... So we dated LDR for about 6 months after graduation. I broke up with him out of the blue, actually right after visiting him. Definitely not because I didn't still love him, or because I wasn't attracted to him.. I didn't know why and that's why it hurt so so much. He's giving me a lot of distance, which according to you, is what he should be doing. I guess my question is: Why does GIGS happen to some people and not to others? Is it because some of us grew up in a bubble, and now that we're free to do what we want, we feel the need to get a piece of everything? My second question is: Does GIGS ever happen twice, thrice, or over and over again? Is there a way to make sure it stays away from you next time? Because all I know is I never have to go through this again, whether it's with my ex or not. Edited November 15, 2012 by Tiwala Link to post Share on other sites
itsmyfault Posted November 15, 2012 Share Posted November 15, 2012 This is Amazingly accurate, It is like you have taking the words from my head. Unfortunately I was the dumper, And as you so rightly said it came out of no where. I know why it happened to me, It was my first love filled relationship, we were literally smitten, I loved this girl to pieces, I literally did everything for her and for us. I never wanted to hurt her. But where we differed was that she had relationships fail, been out partying. She new she wanted a serious and forever us. Your time scales are accurate too. after a few months I tried to get us back together, But alas, I was too late. Like you say, both parties do leave the door open though, I know one day we will meet again, and maybe we will hit it off. Who knows. We clicked so well before. I kind of feel like Breaking my NC to send her what you have put, I have struggled so desperately to explain why i broke up with her. I think I will leave it though, she is in a happy place, I will save it for when we next meet, or when we next talk. But I have to thank you for this, as being rejected feels equally as bad.. Im sure any one who got the grass is greener syndrome will agree. Link to post Share on other sites
itsmyfault Posted November 15, 2012 Share Posted November 15, 2012 Nope, First rule about GIGS club, dont talk about GIGS to an ex... They wont know, understand, care, etc and think you are trying to manipulate them. Best thing to do is end the relationship and move forward You are completely wrong. Im G.I.G.S, I completely understand it, I can see the affect it has on someone. It is an awful feeling to love someone so much but for some reason you just cant be with them, Reasons you cant even explain. Just because you break up with someone doesn't mean you are a heartless pig. There are so many people on this forum who seem so "Damaged" by their experiences. Yes I can see its awful to be dumped, But it is just as awful when you realise that G.I.G.S doesnt exist and you have lost it all. That person has to live with all of the regret. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts