Am I doing the right thing?

[Rap17]

My girlfriend through 1½ years wanted a break, but after a week we ended up talking again. She broke down and told me that one night she had been kissing this other guy when I was at work. We have always been very much in love, but she has issues from the past that haunts her. She has a mother who gambles and cant overcome it, and because of this they havent been in contact for several years. I know she feels guilty for leaving her mom, but that she was always adamant about not having contact with her until she broke her habit and got well, which may never happen. She has self esteem issues, even though shes a very pretty woman, and I know I havanet been paying attention to her like I used, since I have been stressed out with work and Uni. We never really argued and shes the kind of girl that doesnt really talk about her emotional problems alot, but keeps it to herself until the bubble bursts. I have always been there for her, regardless of being busy, and been very loving and caring. For the past half year we didnt have as much sex as we used to, I was feeling drained and tired most of the time, and we talked about these issues several times.

 

But I forgave her for kissing with the other guy after a long talk and we got back together again for two weeks. Then she showed up at my appartment and broke it off again, telling me that she was filled with guilt about what had happened and couldnt cope, that she had "faked" the past two weeks in front of familiy, friends and me, and that she needed time to find herself and work on the emotional issues she had from the past, and past relationships. I have later learned that she didnt fkae anything, that she thought I was wonderful to her for those two weeks and that I was very attentive. We had been having regular sex again and I thought everything was working out, even though we had agreed that it would take more than a few weeks to fix our relationship. Needless to say, I was devastated. We exchanged keys and I broke down crying, she cried as well and told me that if I loved her I would let her go, to which I replied that because I loved her I couldnt. But nothing could be done to change her mind, so I obliged.

 

This happend two weeks ago. After she broke up, it began bothering me that I didnt know who she had been kissing. Since we attend Uni together, I was afraid that the guy was someone I knew and that he was laughing behind my back, I got a bit paranoid really. So I texted her asking who he was, (she had told me that who he was wasnt relevant when we got back together), and she got angry. But in the end she told me I didnt know him and that he didnt attend Uni, that he was an old work colleague and that he didnt mean anything to her. A mutual friend confirmed this as well.

 

But it wasnt over. I felt like I needed to do something, to fight for her. So I wrote her a handwritten letter, telling her how I felt and what went wrong in our relationship. I kept it positive, but told her that I couldnt handle her being cold towards me and ignoring me, (she was doing this at Uni, but I was careful not to talk to her there), so she would have to come to me when she was willing to talk to me again. I told her that I respected her decision and that I was there for her. That I was worried for her and that I wanted to be with her, that I loved her etc I dropped it off at her appartment when she wasnt home and left. I felt like giving her the initiative was what I needed.

 

Three days later I got a reply from her on Facebook of all places, just a short message. She told me she didnt know what to say, that she still was willing to talk to me but that she was doing fine, although it wasnt easy, and that she hoped I had someone to talk to. It felt like she wasnt really having problems with the situation at all. So, she threw the initiative back to me, and I felt horrible.

 

So, at Uni I went to her and told her I wanted to talk. I was nervous. I told her that I missed talking to her and just saying hi. She was smiling and told me she thought it was harder on me than her, *gulp*, and I told her that I wasnt doing well. I asked her if she wanted to meet for a cup of coffe when things settled a little, maybe in a weeks time, and she could let me know when she could meet up, and that I would check and see if it was a good time. She agreed and she had the initiative again.

 

But I felt horrible that she was smiling and acting like life was good. So after talking to some friends about it I made a decision. I felt something wasnt right and that I had to do something. So, two days later, (this wednesday), I seeked her out at Uni again and told her that I really needed to meet and talk with her, that I needed her to be open with me. She smiled and we agreed to meet up that same night. I went to her place and we talked for four hours, about EVERYTHING. Went through our relationship, talked about sex, problems, issues and how she and I were feeling. She broke down crying and I learned that she still loved me, although she was very reluctant to use the "L" word and similar. Told me that I was different from the other guys she had been with, that I was a wonderful guy, but that she needed to figure out her issues and why she hurt the one she loved. No self esteem, felt guilty for cheating and all that. I held her in my arms. She was cold in the beginning, then warmed up and went back and forth like that. She told me she had issues with men and revealed to me that a guy had treated her like crap when she was very young. Oddly, we ended up flirting a bit, but we agreed that it probably wasnt a good idea to go there, even though I could tell she wanted to. I held her, kissed her goodbye on her forehead and left. I felt good after this, had some closure and knew she still had feelings for me, that her being happy all the time was just a facade, that it was very hard on her and that was her way of coping. I felt hope again.

 

Then I did something stupid. This friday I went to the bar at Uni with some fellow students and she was there. At some point we talked briefly, she seemed happy to see me and I smiled to her. She told me I shouldnt be looking at her the way I did, but I didnt really realise it at the time. Hell, Im in love with her, what can I do. Just did some small talk for a couple of minutes, then I went back to talk with my friends. There was some girls here I hadnt met and we talked and I tried to have not think of her too much. I could tell she was looking at me once in a while, out of the corner of my eye. So, I got drunk. At some point I went to her and wanted to talk again, and we went outside. Then I broke down, telling her that I understood what she was going through but that I was having a hard time since I knew what she felt about me, but couldnt be with me. We ended up arguing, she got angry and pushed me away and she said that I could just go hang out with the "pretty girls" I had been talking to and that I could have my revenge for what she did to me. I was shocked. She said that it was over and that she couldnt be with me right now. She asked me if I was keeping an eye on her, and I told her that I was just just trying to live my life and have a bit of fun in all of this mess. Truly, I didnt come on to the other girls at all, I was just having a friendly chat nothing more. She began crying and pushed me away again, and I cried. We argued a bit more, said some petty hurtful things, then I left. I got home and phoned her but she wouldnt pick up. Then she phoned me back and told me that it was a bad idea talking when we were drunk, that we could talk the day after.

 

I phoned her this saturday, I wanted to talk to her about what happened. She phoned me and I told her that I was sorry for acting like I did, that in my drunken state I had forgotten our talk a couple of nights before and had been acting emotional and out of control, that it was the alcohol talking. She accepted it, but told me that our chances of getting back together had been hampered by it, and that she still needed the space. She told me that she was of two minds about me. That when she saw me she was thinking of being with me again and let things go back to normal since she really cared for me, but on the other hand she couldnt get past the guilt issue at the moment and needed to find herself, be independant for a while and work through her personal issues.

 

I told her that I was willing to wait for her, but that I needed to know if she had plans to work through the issues with herself, cause I needed to know if I was just hanging around to no avail. (She had talked about therapy). She told me that she would maybe be crawling back to me when she had had more time to think things through, but that for now she didnt want to be with me. So, I told her that I would leave her alone for a while, to give her the space she needs. I asked if she wanted to perhaps meet up again in a months time to see how things were, she said maybe but that she couldnt promise anything. Then I asked her to tell me when she had made up her mind about her and me, and she agreed, but again that she couldnt promise me that she wanted to get back together. I told her that I would miss her, we said our byes, then I hung up.

 

I know she loves me, and I know that she cares and never wanted to hurt me. My plan now is no contact, to try and avoid her as much as I possibly can. If she feels guilt when she sees me I figured that the best thing for both of us would be not to see eachother at all, litteraly. I plan to skip the couple of classes we have together the next month and to be out of sight so she might have a chance to miss me again.

 

I love her so much and shes the woman I want to share my life with. Am I doing the right thing with no contact now?

 

Thanks for reading my story.

Edited November 7, 2010 by Rap17

[durkadurka]

Don't suffer from one-itis buddy.

[Rap17]

Don't suffer from one-itis buddy.

 

Which means?

[durkadurka]

Which means?

 

There is more than one fish in the pond, which means, don't lean on her too much.

 

You will find another, or she might come back. Who knows.

[WTRanger]

You are doing it right by no contact. But you can't do no contact with an end date in mind for a potential 2nd shot. If you do this, you will always focus on that date, always keeping the hope alive and it will hinder your progress every step of the way. You need to act as if all hope is dead. She's wanting to explore other options and you need to let her go. Above all, do not make her a priority when she only sees you as an option.

 

I wouldn't go as far as skipping classes if it will affect your overall grade. That's not smart and you may just have to gut through things until the end of the semester.

[Rap17]

There is more than one fish in the pond, which means, don't lean on her too much.

 

You will find another, or she might come back. Who knows.

 

 

Well, I know. But its really hard for me to accept. If she still loves me then why cant she work through her problems with me at her side? I know that Im part of the problem too, taking into consideration that she cheated on me, and I respect that she needs space to sort things out. She tells me shes done with men for now and just want to be by herself and work it out, I should add that she practically hasnt been alone in her adult life. Shes 22 and before me she was in a four year relationship with a guy who seemed like a douche from what she told me. She told me that Im different and one of the good guys, which I know I am thats not the issue. I forgave her for it and Im ready to put the past behind us, even though I was gutted when she told me.

 

Knowing how she feels, do you think no contact is the way to go?

[durkadurka]

Well, I know. But its really hard for me to accept. If she still loves me then why cant she work through her problems with me at her side? I know that Im part of the problem too, taking into consideration that she cheated on me, and I respect that she needs space to sort things out. She tells me shes done with men for now and just want to be by herself and work it out, I should add that she practically hasnt been alone in her adult life. Shes 22 and before me she was in a four year relationship with a guy who seemed like a douche from what she told me. She told me that Im different and one of the good guys, which I know I am thats not the issue. I forgave her for it and Im ready to put the past behind us, even though I was gutted when she told me.

 

Knowing how she feels, do you think no contact is the way to go?

 

Dude, I lived with a girl for 2.5 years who wouldn't apply for a job or try to make friends. It got to the point where I had to set up 'play dates' for her, and invite her friends over for her.

 

I flew down to visit her 3 months ago and offered to stand by her when her family was going through a really hard time. I said that we should resolve our issues before we thinking about getting back together.

 

Instead, she's dating some 35 year old guy now 3 weeks after I leave. Like you, I was gutted.

 

I can't pretend to understand what women are thinking.

 

I don't believe like everyone else does that 'no contact' is a bible, I just think it's the best way to isolate yourself from becoming more damaged by the situation.

 

I can't remember the last time my ex called (even though she only broke up with me officially 2 months ago) when I actually felt really good after I talked to her.

[Rap17]

You are doing it right by no contact. But you can't do no contact with an end date in mind for a potential 2nd shot. If you do this, you will always focus on that date, always keeping the hope alive and it will hinder your progress every step of the way. You need to act as if all hope is dead. She's wanting to explore other options and you need to let her go. Above all, do not make her a priority when she only sees you as an option.

 

I wouldn't go as far as skipping classes if it will affect your overall grade. That's not smart and you may just have to gut through things until the end of the semester.

 

Thanks for the reply. Well, it seems like the logical step. If she sees me every other week how can she miss me? The class thing is not a problem, we follow seperate courses at the moment and only have to be there both for a meeting to discuss some holiday party and then for an event that hasnt got any importance grade wise anyway.

 

I know that I cant expect the 2nd date, and Im not doing that at all. I wanted to let her know Im here for her if she has doubts, (shes confused about me I can tell), but that its up to her to make the contact. Basically Im giving her what she wants, space and time to think.

 

Im wondering if its best to completely dissapear out of sight, or if I should try and stay friendly with her. Keep in mind, I dont want her to regard me as a friend, even though were best friends.

[Rap17]

Dude, I lived with a girl for 2.5 years who wouldn't apply for a job or try to make friends. It got to the point where I had to set up 'play dates' for her, and invite her friends over for her.

 

I flew down to visit her 3 months ago and offered to stand by her when her family was going through a really hard time. I said that we should resolve our issues before we thinking about getting back together.

 

Instead, she's dating some 35 year old guy now 3 weeks after I leave. Like you, I was gutted.

 

I can't pretend to understand what women are thinking.

 

I don't believe like everyone else does that 'no contact' is a bible, I just think it's the best way to isolate yourself from becoming more damaged by the situation.

 

I can't remember the last time my ex called (even though she only broke up with me officially 2 months ago) when I actually felt really good after I talked to her.

 

 

I see where youre coming from. Thing is, we were always good at doing seperate things, giving eachother the freedom to do what we wanted in our spare time. But she has always been more attached than I have, I guess its because Im older than she is. She has a problem with running from her problems historically, and I feel thats what shes doing again. She told me she needed the space to also not repeat the same pattern she had been going through thus far, working on issues instead of running away from them and her past.

[durkadurka]

Thanks for the reply. Well, it seems like the logical step. If she sees me every other week how can she miss me? The class thing is not a problem, we follow seperate courses at the moment and only have to be there both for a meeting to discuss some holiday party and then for an event that hasnt got any importance grade wise anyway.

 

I know that I cant expect the 2nd date, and Im not doing that at all. I wanted to let her know Im here for her if she has doubts, (shes confused about me I can tell), but that its up to her to make the contact. Basically Im giving her what she wants, space and time to think.

 

Im wondering if its best to completely dissapear out of sight, or if I should try and stay friendly with her. Keep in mind, I dont want her to regard me as a friend, even though were best friends.

 

You can't let her think of you like that, otherwise, you'll be a pussy and a fall back plan.

 

Get out of her life and make yourself better and more marketable commodity.

[Rap17]

You can't let her think of you like that, otherwise, you'll be a pussy and a fall back plan.

 

Get out of her life and make yourself better and more marketable commodity.

 

Yeah. What Im doing at the moment is starting to work out again and doing stuff for myself, trying to think of other things ans work on my own issues. I feel good about myself despite the pain, but Im not sitting home alone all the time and sulking, Im seeing friends and doing other things to not feel too sorry for myself.

 

But I also know shes the one. Ive dated some very beautiful women, women who were very different from eachother, so Im quite sure of this, Ive been around.

 

She told me during our last phonecall that she was afraid of us getting back together again, and then history would repeat itself. So I understand that she needs to figure herself out. Im working on myself now, and trying to stay out of sight so she can see a real difference in me when we meet again. If she meets me one of these days, Im well aware that she musnt see me as a pathetic puppy, but as strong and independant.

[durkadurka]

Yeah. What Im doing at the moment is starting to work out again and doing stuff for myself, trying to think of other things ans work on my own issues. I feel good about myself despite the pain, but Im not sitting home alone all the time and sulking, Im seeing friends and doing other things to not feel too sorry for myself.

 

But I also know shes the one. Ive dated some very beautiful women, women who were very different from eachother, so Im quite sure of this, Ive been around.

 

She told me during our last phonecall that she was afraid of us getting back together again, and then history would repeat itself. So I understand that she needs to figure herself out. Im working on myself now, and trying to stay out of sight so she can see a real difference in me when we meet again. If she meets me one of these days, Im well aware that she musnt see me as a pathetic puppy, but as strong and independant.

 

Yeah it's fuuuuuuuuucked. I anticipated that reaction and told my ex that we needed to work on our unresolved issues before we discussed me seriously moving down to be with her.

 

E.G. there were things going on in our lives independent of each other that was making our life unpredictable.

 

I thought I was making the mature choice, but it didn't work.

[durkadurka]

I see where youre coming from. Thing is, we were always good at doing seperate things, giving eachother the freedom to do what we wanted in our spare time. But she has always been more attached than I have, I guess its because Im older than she is. She has a problem with running from her problems historically, and I feel thats what shes doing again. She told me she needed the space to also not repeat the same pattern she had been going through thus far, working on issues instead of running away from them and her past.

 

Yeah this is the only time my ex has RUN to a problem, her family. They're in serious financial trouble and things weren't good enough between her and I to encourage her to stay here.

 

She's a runner, and she ran into the arms of the next guy willing to offer her stability.

[Rap17]

Yeah this is the only time my ex has RUN to a problem, her family. They're in serious financial trouble and things weren't good enough between her and I to encourage her to stay here.

 

She's a runner, and she ran into the arms of the next guy willing to offer her stability.

 

 

From my perspective, my ex runs away when she feels like someone is letting her down, like she felt her mom did when she couldnt get over her gambling habit, and that she doesnt feel like shes good enough for her mom since her mother cant fight to break the habit for her.

 

And now she feels like shes not good enough for me since she cheated on me. See the pattern here? Thats why I had to put myself in the position of being there for her when she makes up her mind. Simply because I cant let her feel that Im letting her down too, if that makes any sense.

 

Shes going throught a rough time right now, self awareness can be painful.

[Rap17]

Ill keep updating this thread, and any advice is most welcome. Im gonna try and stay clear of her this week at Uni.

[Rap17]

2nd day of NC today and Im doing ok. Been at home most of the day and been thinking a lot about her, but feeling ok under the circumstances. Been reading a ton of posts in the LS forum to gain more insight on this thing.

 

Something odd happened today though. I went on Facebook in a moment of weakness and found a message from a woman I dated for a few months, just before I met my ex girlfriend. We were never serious, more like friends with benefits, that sort of thing. Shes insanely attractive and very intelligent. She asked how I was doing, and told her that I wasnt too well, that my ex left me etc. She wrote a long message back telling me that she was doing fine and in a relationship, but that I shouldnt be down because Im a fantastic guy and that men like me are rare. Messaged back and forth then we talked about meeting for a cup of coffee some time in the future, that she would love to be friends with me and that she missed talking to me.

 

I gotta admit this made me feel a little bit better. My ex saw her profile once and got very jealous of her looks, and well, she is kinda bombshell.

 

Going to Uni tomorrow and will try and dodge my ex, hope she doesnt see me there. Me, her and a bunch of other people are to meet up to discuss some party were hosting at Uni in two weeks time, but Im not gonna show up. I think us not seeing eachother in person is best at the moment. Wish me luck.

[Rap17]

Day 3 of NC and feeling horrible. Having a hard time not looking at Facebook to see what shes doing. Managed to avoid seeing her at Uni today and didnt go to the meeting she was attending, just sent a text to another classmate saying I wouldnt be going to the party were planning as said that I was not attending the meeting.

 

I hope it gets easier than this, feels like my heart is being punched in by a bulldozer. I know, give her time like she asked me to and that she made no promises, but I just feel so powerless.

[Fern]

Day 3 of NC and feeling horrible. Having a hard time not looking at Facebook to see what shes doing. Managed to avoid seeing her at Uni today and didnt go to the meeting she was attending, just sent a text to another classmate saying I wouldnt be going to the party were planning as said that I was not attending the meeting.

 

I hope it gets easier than this, feels like my heart is being punched in by a bulldozer. I know, give her time like she asked me to and that she made no promises, but I just feel so powerless.

 

 

Stay strong. It does get better. And more than that - it works!

[Rap17]

Stay strong. It does get better. And more than that - it works!

 

Thanks man, I need the cheering up. I still cant believe that she kissed with another guy, an impulsive act because she didnt feel I appreciated her enough, (Honestly wasnt like that for me), and then broke up with me because she feels guilty every time she sees me. After she broke down and revealed it to me, I gave it some days of thought and calmed my mind, then sincerely forgave her for it.

 

And now she doesnt want to be with me, "space, independance, find herself" kind of thing.

 

She told me that when she sees me part of her wants to be with me and sort things out, another part cant get over the guilt issue, and I havent been pestering her with it either.

 

Spent two weeks trying to win her back, now on 3 days of NC. She cant forgive herself so cant be with me? And need to work out the issue by herself?

 

All of this is so hard for me to understand.

[Fern]

Give her - and yourself - some space. Try to keep busy and don't dwell. Delete all her numbers etc so you can't cave in a weak moment. Really commit to this and you'll feel better. Taking control feels good.

[Rap17]

Give her - and yourself - some space. Try to keep busy and don't dwell. Delete all her numbers etc so you can't cave in a weak moment. Really commit to this and you'll feel better. Taking control feels good.

 

Thanks mate. Have already deleted her on my msn contact list and her phonenumber. Cant remove her from my Facebook list, I have a feeling thats not a good idea, even though I cant help but check in now and again. If shes online I log out immediatly. Will use this thread as a diary and post more tomorrow.

 

Thanks for the support, I really need it.

[Rap17]

Day 4 of NC.

 

Been a quiet day. Went to Uni for a couple of hours and didnt bump into her, but might be because I avoided the cantina and stuck to the corridors. Yeah, feels so wrong avoiding her but I know thats what I have to do.

 

Got home and unfortunatly went onto a manic Facebook spree, checking her profile every half hour or so but she hasnt posted anything new today. Its one of those days where Im home alone with no plans and my mind just drifts to the memories we share, and how much I love her. Im trying to keep occupied with random stuff, but its not helping me today. Feeling slightly demovated and numb.

 

Trying to rest my thoughts but its to no avail today. One other thing thats worrying me is that I was planning to spend christmas night with her and her family, but that was before she dumped me. She even asked me to join them, reason being that my nearest family lives abroad and I might not be able to afford the trip. Looks like I might have to spend Christmas by myself, which doesnt make this churning feeling in my stomach any less painful.

 

The party our class is hosting at Uni is in 9 days. I hope she will think about me when Im not there, cause I wont be showing up. I know NC is for myself, but I cant give up hope. If theres a chance she will start to miss me in my absense I have to take it.

 

Btw, Im not updating my FB status at all. Do you think thats a good idea, to not show whats happening in my life at all? I know she has been checking my profile daily from last week when we had that 4 hour long talk.

 

Thanks for reading.

[alimpo83]

I know how you're feeling, i'm on my third week. Get out, meet new people, thank them on your fb, without showing you're mega happy or something, or your ex will notice. Show you are getting a new life, a better you, outside of your past relation. I'm doing that, having fun, while still thinking about her at times, but getting on with my life, slowly. Today I have a date with another girl. It's good to have new dates and people in your life! I now can enter my facebook account without checking her profile! I still read what see writes on her mural, but only if it appears. I don't try to find it!

[Rap17]

I know how you're feeling, i'm on my third week. Get out, meet new people, thank them on your fb, without showing you're mega happy or something, or your ex will notice. Show you are getting a new life, a better you, outside of your past relation. I'm doing that, having fun, while still thinking about her at times, but getting on with my life, slowly. Today I have a date with another girl. It's good to have new dates and people in your life! I now can enter my facebook account without checking her profile! I still read what see writes on her mural, but only if it appears. I don't try to find it!

 

 

Thanks mate, but problem is its probably too early to "seem" like everything is fine yet. I tried that at the bar at Uni this friday and things went to hell, and we argued. She told me to go back and talk to the "blond girls" that were at my table and take revenge on what she did to me, (kissed with another guy). She seemed totally jealous and like she was trying to pin her mistakes on me. "He had it coming" kind of vibe. And trust me, Ive never ever flirted or glanced at other women while I was with my ex, and I didnt this friday either, just tried to have a bit of fun and meet new people, no ulterior motive at all. But she thought I was spying on her and nonsense, ofc these accusations came after I went into a drunken "why cant you be with me" state.

 

So I sense that if I act like my life is great atm, it will be too obvious to her that its not. I know it probably sounds ridiculous, but it in a way it feels wiser to not give anything away at all atm.

 

But I dont know really, let me know what you guys think.

 

*Update* Just saw she changed her profile picture on FB to a new one where shes smiling and seemingly happy. **** Facebook, just put me in the gutter again.

Edited November 10, 2010 by Rap17

[brown03]

OK I suggest just give her the time she needs. Also I think it's going to take her longer because you kinda made her feel guilty from taking this break. Sometime's people just need space and you need to give that to them. I was the same way awhile ago I didn't want to take a break I thought we could fix thing's on our own told her I would change.

 

Well we didn't take that break and now we have been broken up for 8 months and she doesn't even talk to me. And had I just said I can see you need some time apart I will give that to you. I would have had time to miss her and realize alot as well as her and we would still be together. Plus she would have respected me more for it.

 

So what I suggest to you is give her a letter saying. " After the last couple days I have had time to think and I realize now you just want some time and I just want you to know I respect that and you have no reason to feel guilty or upset about this at all. I want you to take all the time that you need because I know in the end if we do get back together then our relationship will be stronger for it and I know that this is the right thing to do. I know that I said we should get together in a month but I don't think we should put a time on thing's because if we rush back into thing's without figuring everything out then it will never be healed. I also want you to know that if you have any problem or anything you want to talk about I am here for you when ever you need me and I will not take it wrong or push anything on you. I love you and I can see now that we really need this and I don't want you to worry about anything except your self for as long as you need" Not perfect just a rough draft. Word things a bit differently if you want but dont forget the meaning.

 

What this does is it allows her to take this time apart with respect for you and with no guilt which will only make thing's worse. And in turn the guilt you are causing so she will remember that and will have hard feelings towards you. If you just say this it will also give her the mind set that your ok with this and are kind of over some of it and are ready to move forward and she will know this and be afraid that she could lose you which will speed thing's up a bit. I swear this is what she needs to hear you made her feel guilty and time apart is never a bad thing if your meant to be. I promise she will respect you more if you send this. Also don't tell a girl that you are hurting for this it makes them feel bad and guilty and the only reason they will come back is because they feel bad and will not last because they hold it against you. I promise you if I had this site or advice when we were dating thing's would be awsome it has helped alot

 

Also stop over thinking everything man when me and my ex broke up she always smiled and laughed but inside we were both devastated it mean's nothing. When you are infront of people you don't want to be a downer. Also I just went to the bar inside I was having a ****ty time but on the outsside I was smiling and laughing talking to everyone. It's good to do because EXs over think it and think your moving on don't over think it it means nothing. She's is not going to show you she is down.

Edited November 11, 2010 by brown03