Move or break up??

[Treetopbaby]

My SO and I have been LD for 9 months now and he has recently moved to the big city for work. Im from the country and havent even moved out of the town i live in except when travelling ever! We have been gettng on fine seperatly and when we see each other its amazing but it really annoys me being so far away from him, especially as now hes moved jobs and got his own place I dont know anything about it.

I havent seen him for 3weeks already (which is long for us as its normally every week we are together). And cant even imagine where hes living now or what its like, I no longer know any of his friends or people he works and live with and im totally out of touch with his life.

We both have busy working days and never have the same days off. Its really hard but i get to see him this weekend (which will be great),

 

HOWEVER,

 

We had the conversation "we need to decide how serious we are" because seeing eachother for an evening (from 6pm til 7am the next morning) every two weeks isn't enough for either of us. Especially if theres no end in sight.

 

I am terrified of big cities generally and EXTREMELY paranoid and claustraphobic if you throw me somewhere busy, but I need to give it a chance. Im going to see his flat and stay for the evening next week but what if i cant stand it??

 

He has already said he cant leave his job (and i dont blame him, hes got a great job for him and hes only just started) and a month or two ago he asked me to move in with him there if i like it.

 

again,

 

HOWEVER,

 

1) I dont want to move there and hate it

2) I dont want us to rush into it and mess up the relationship

3) His let atm is a 6month contract so I couldnt live with him until then atleast

4) If we split up I would be stuck there, away from home, on my own until my lease expired.

 

I have a sort of plan which is:

 

1) see if i like the city and try wandering around for a bit then make a decision

2) i wouldnt move there unless i had a job secured because I do not want to be sat around all day with no-one to talk to and be a burden fincially.

3) i think id want to live on my own first, but close enough to see him often so we had our own space.

 

Thing is, im only 20. Lots of people have said "your too young to move away for a boy"

He's 24 and perfect. Hes mature and soo lovely, hes innocent and treats me like a princess.

 

Im just scared I'll move there for him and we wont last 2 weeks, I'll be back home with no job and back into my parents house and broken hearted.

 

We havent been together years which makes me think were moving too fast but I dont feel that staying like this will last for much longer. Were both comfort creatures and need someone with us for a cuddle and to talk to.

 

I dont know what to do,

 

SUCH a MESS, I worry and make myself ill.

 

any advice would be great, I just want us to work out.

 

TreeTopBaby

 

xx

[HeavenOrHell]

You're so full of doubt that I think it would be too soon to move, 9 months isn't long. You don't have to wait too long to meet up, I'd love to see my partner every week, it doesn't even sound long distance to me Maybe one or both of you isn't committed enough to go the distance, compared to many people on this forum who wait weeks or months to see their partners but are still willing to work at it and be patient.

Just sounds to me like you are rushing things when there are so many ifs and buts.