Post here if you have reached 28 days NC or more...

[fun2bewith]

THE FIRST 28

 

If you can make 28 days, you can successfully get your smile back...just make sure you live your life while the 28 days pass...

 

This is just to encourage everyone that is going through a tough time and consider taking a sip of the "make contact alcohol".

 

I am not at 28 days yet I am only at 16.

Lets see how many people can we encourage!

 

 

Post your power....

[PegNosePete]

26. Had to check my emails and use a calendar to count it.

 

I will be breaking it soon though, to ask her why she hasn't returned her acknowledgement of service, and informing her that if she doesn't start co-operating, I will have a court bailiff serve it to her in the most public place possible.

[fun2bewith]

26. Had to check my emails and use a calendar to count it.

 

I will be breaking it soon though, to ask her why she hasn't returned her acknowledgement of service, and informing her that if she doesn't start co-operating, I will have a court bailiff serve it to her in the most public place possible.

 

Just two more days for you!!! Then you have reached 28 and then its okay to break the contact for this specific reason....

[sacg]

Wow! I'm impressed in two ways.

 

1. I had to go to my calender and physically count the days, when before, boy, I knew how many...and

 

2. It's 47 days!!!!!!!!! **** man, that's almost 1.5 months, and I AM starting to feel better, after 2.5 years of ****, that feels good. Had a bad few days recently, but I'm definatley feeling, well, more detached.

 

I think I'm finally moving on.

 

This NC REALLY works, LMFAO! If only I knew this 2.5 years ago.

 

:-)

 

Keep it up chaps, DO NOT CAVE!

[ARISthess]

Wow! I'm impressed in two ways.

 

1. I had to go to my calender and physically count the days, when before, boy, I knew how many...and

 

2. It's 47 days!!!!!!!!! **** man, that's almost 1.5 months, and I AM starting to feel better, after 2.5 years of ****, that feels good. Had a bad few days recently, but I'm definatley feeling, well, more detached.

 

I think I'm finally moving on.

 

This NC REALLY works, LMFAO! If only I knew this 2.5 years ago.

 

:-)

 

Keep it up chaps, DO NOT CAVE!

 

Good to hear your feeling better. It is indeed a good sign if you don't know how many days its been

[nowwhatnow]

it will be EXACTLY a month tomorrow for me

wow, i am actually quite proud of myself

p.s. does it still count if he was trying to contact me and i only responded by text message to tell him to stop?

[heart_stumble]

I should be about 2 months into NC, but I have to break NC cause of a debt I have to pay back, should be over soon. But to all out there NC and getting on with your life has really really helped...and as sacg says DO NOT CAVE.

[cozenedindigo]

25 days!!!!!!!

[Leandro]

I think I have the most so far. . 65 days!!

[sacg]

.............

[alwayshoping]

56 days nc

I hate this rollacoster.

[112233]

Post your power....

 

This NC stuff is like a religion around here. Pathetic really.

[EricaH329]

This NC stuff is like a religion around here. Pathetic really.

 

How is it pathetic? If it works, and isn't harmful (but instead, the opposite), then how is there something wrong with that?

 

BTW -- I've lost count, but if I were to guess i'd say around 3 months.

[112233]

How is it pathetic? If it works, and isn't harmful (but instead, the opposite), then how is there something wrong with that?

 

BTW -- I've lost count, but if I were to guess i'd say around 3 months.

 

Pathetic might be too strong, but it's sort of sad. To be clear, it's sad that "it works", why should it matter? Seems like a way to be weak instead of toughening up.

[sacg]

Good for you mate.

 

WTF are you here? Lay **** on others?

[EricaH329]

Pathetic might be too strong, but it's sort of sad. To be clear, it's sad that "it works", why should it matter? Seems like a way to be weak instead of toughening up.

 

That's where perspective comes in. I personally believe it's weak to give into an ex's contact. I believe it takes a strong person to walk away from something or someone, when every ounce of their being is telling them not to.

 

It's a form of moving on. Allowing yourself a clear mind to better yourself, and learn from past mistakes. If you were trying to become a vegetarian, you wouldn't indulge in a meat occasionally, would you? It's a tough process, takes a lot of self control, but it really does help in the end.

[112233]

It's a form of moving on. Allowing yourself a clear mind to better yourself, and learn from past mistakes. If you were trying to become a vegetarian, you wouldn't indulge in a meat occasionally, would you? It's a tough process, takes a lot of self control, but it really does help in the end.

 

OK, so if I were trying to become a vegetarian and I blamed my setbacks on the smell of a steakhouse, and thus decided to go to great lengths to avoid being anywhere near them, or any people who were grilling etc., I would be sort of weak.

 

It might help, it might work, but damn. Maybe the core issue should be addressed instead of covering it over.

[EricaH329]

OK, so if I were trying to become a vegetarian and I blamed my setbacks on the smell of a steakhouse, and thus decided to go to great lengths to avoid being anywhere near them, or any people who were grilling etc., I would be sort of weak.

 

I can see what you're saying, but wouldn't it be extremely hard to make sure that you didn't go near those places? You want to so much, even if it's just for the smell, but instead you realize that (in the beginning) you might not be able to control yourself.

 

After some time has passed, though, it no longer phases you. And you are able to even go inside of the steakhouse with friends, and only order a salad.

 

That's when it all pays off.

 

It might help, it might work, but damn. Maybe the core issue should be addressed instead of covering it over.

 

But the core issue does get addressed, while you are in NC. While you have the time away from the problem, to pick apart the problem. If that makes sense.

[112233]

But the core issue does get addressed, while you are in NC. While you have the time away from the problem, to pick apart the problem. If that makes sense.

 

Well that IS the main thing, but I really like to take things more head on, and NC doesn't help with that. Maybe some people need it but I hate the way it's treated like some sort of goal unto itself here, as witnessed by this thread.

 

Far better to have a party about "I solved my personal issues and don't need NC anymore", don't ya think?

[EricaH329]

Well that IS the main thing, but I really like to take things more head on, and NC doesn't help with that. Maybe some people need it but I hate the way it's treated like some sort of goal unto itself here, as witnessed by this thread.

 

Far better to have a party about "I solved my personal issues and don't need NC anymore", don't ya think?

 

To each their own. I do agree with the fact that instead of focusing on NC, you should be focusing on the personal issues at hand. I think that if you don't focus on those, then NC is pointless.

 

For example, I used to NC to allow myself the freedom of being able to focus on my own issues, without any setbacks or interruptions. It worked wonders. I don't need NC anymore, but not because i'm done sorting out those particular issues, but because my ex isn't someone I want to be associated with any longer.

[ganbare]

NC by itself won't do the trick but it does give a way to protect your emotional outlook and it gives space for your mind to concentrate on working through the problem and accepting the fact that you have to take care of yourself. As for me I am on 1 month and 3 weeks of NC and although I am far from healed I would be a complete mess right now if I hadn't gone NC. It's all about baby steps, 112233. You can't get over a major life crisis in one day so you take small steps and work toward your goal. The turtle always wins though.

[Leandro]

Look, this thread is for people to see that it is possible to go NC and stick to it. It's to motivate others to stick to it.

 

You coming in here and saying that it is weak is not going to help them out.

 

I don't believe I am weak for going NC. Going from 1000s of texts per weeks to nothing the next is pretty strong I think.

[112233]

Going from 1000s of texts per weeks to nothing the next is pretty strong I think.

 

Thousands of texts/week? I can see why you might think that.

[Leandro]

Thousands of texts/week? I can see why you might think that.

lol yea, but not ever week. It just depended on what was happening that week. Some times it was half of that.

 

Do understand that I'm not trying to be rude or anything here.

[sacg]

Listen 112233,

 

I know where you coming from, i really do. But you seem a little harsh and expect everyone to be able to face things as you do, or theyre weak. Life aint like that. You dont come across like some immature kid, so your well aware of this. I'm not a push over, I'm not, or should i say, never have been weak. I've faced some heavy **** in my time, probably stuff that would shake you, but for whatever reason, this episode in my life did knock me sideways.

 

Im still amazed at how much, and only after going NC did i allow myself to pull away from this. To now face it "head on" as you say.

 

You seem a strong guy, but iI'm doubting you've never been through some traumatic time that almost made you question your behavour to the situation. Each to there own i say. If you haven't, well that's another thread altogether.

 

You sound too damn strong and maybe that's out of bitterness and how you've become? I see you've been through divorce.

 

Just think of others, and respect everyone aint all the same. Strong, weak or not. I doesnt really dictate a persons overall character. Some people fold at losing a job, some at trying to jack a habit. Each to their own man.

 

Good for you for being so black and white.