orangesean Posted December 4, 2010 Share Posted December 4, 2010 It's definitely good advice to steer clear of this girl any way possible. Ignoring BOTH friend requests is the correct answer. You don't need to know what either of them want because you already know: to mess with your head, to feel validated, and to relieve guilt. Anything beyond that is even slimier. Just don't touch it. Don't even add her friend and ignore her, because while playing mind games back might be fun, it'll only spiral you back into her web. I'm serious, there is no need to be curious. I'm not sure exactly what you were saying in your latest post, but I think you said you overcame the curiousity? Anyway, another tip for Facebook safety and etiquette I would add is to put both the ex and her friend on your BLOCK list. You can block anyone, some before they ever even know you exist. When you block someone, they can't see you exist any longer on Facebook and vice versa. It's very handy and wires will no longer get crossed. You don't even have to see your block list ever unless you dig for someone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author listen_to_me_please Posted December 4, 2010 Author Share Posted December 4, 2010 (edited) It's definitely good advice to steer clear of this girl any way possible. Ignoring BOTH friend requests is the correct answer. You don't need to know what either of them want because you already know: to mess with your head, to feel validated, and to relieve guilt. Anything beyond that is even slimier. Just don't touch it. Don't even add her friend and ignore her, because while playing mind games back might be fun, it'll only spiral you back into her web. I'm serious, there is no need to be curious. I'm not sure exactly what you were saying in your latest post, but I think you said you overcame the curiousity? Well thanks again for the response. I suppose the best course of action is to steer clear of any sort of communication and to neil1987, thanks for sharing your experience. I could just for-see the events that will occur if I do open up any sort of dialogue. I suppose just ignoring her and the friend was the best course of action. I sure do miss sleeping next to that girl. I'm giving this thing more thought that it deserves. Its done, I already ignored them and to answer the above poster's question. No I'm still curious, I just don't know what her motives are for contacting me. Edited December 4, 2010 by listen_to_me_please Link to post Share on other sites
Author listen_to_me_please Posted February 12, 2011 Author Share Posted February 12, 2011 (edited) Well against my better judgment, I decided to re-request this person. On around Jan 7 a few days after I requested her, she accepted and sent me a message. The conversation went something like this: "Hey how are you doing, you look like your taking care of yourself, how do you like your new city" me: Its great, I"ve been down here a year now, come visit me "Sure, I have vacation days in summer and I'll come visit you then" me: Whats your phone number "I lost my cell phone but here is my office phone, call me about 3 or 4. You like saying my name [me], just teasing me: Righto, I'll try to call you if I remember. In the meantime what days are you coming exactly [no response] 30 days later me a month later: I called your office phone but it just rings out her: Here try this phone number So I called her Phone Conversation Small talk, small talk, she laughs, I sense that she's single, I sense that she realizes I was a good man. She starts asking me questions about my family, etc etc, I deflect. She tries to bring up the past, I didn't go there I left her on the phone while I went to get breakfest and then a awful feeling came over me and it went something like this "Why are you even talking to her, hang up immediately" I get back on the phone, she immediately tries to hang up, I give her my office line and then I carry on my day. Prior to her hanging up I get the sense that she left me because we stop going out and she didn't have room to grow. Toward the end of our relationship, I got us an apartment and spent almost 8k decorating it. We spent one night in that place. That was about 3 years ago. I realize now that we stopped being together long before the actual breakup occurred and why we are reconnecting now, I have no idea. Edited February 12, 2011 by listen_to_me_please Link to post Share on other sites
Author listen_to_me_please Posted January 11, 2013 Author Share Posted January 11, 2013 (edited) Update 2. A few months later, I randomly sent her a email calling her a whore. No response A few months later, I wish her Happy New Years Her: Because of your last email, I don't think we can be cool Me: Your twoface No response for 2 months Her: Where did you buy XYZ Me: You can buy it here. 5 days later Her: You know you could always send it to me to save me money Me: I would love to help but I lost it a few years ago. I think like the above poster said, she was trying to feel me out. I dunno. And thats the final end of this chapter, The End. I got closure, yeah baby! Edited January 11, 2013 by listen_to_me_please Link to post Share on other sites
redleader Posted January 11, 2013 Share Posted January 11, 2013 Don't do it. She messed up and messed you up with it. I would have no problems telling her and her dog to get bent (ideally nothing and just ignore it). Do you really want to know why shes back? Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 11, 2013 Share Posted January 11, 2013 afterall both her and her mate added you in the same night! coincidence? Not coincidence. Very much intentional. She probably has nothing going and wants to see what you're up to and available. If you answer her then she will feel she has you in her back pocket. If you fall for her again, she will eventually ditch you and break your heart all over again. Ignore her. Do not accept the friend request from the ex and her friend. She is your past. Leave her there. Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 11, 2013 Share Posted January 11, 2013 100% Agree with this move!!! I did this to my ex And I mess up her mind on that one!!! 100% works!! What's crazy is I friend requested her and I didn't even say nothing until she was liking my statuses etccc dropping clues I was thinking this, too. Just remember: if he accepts the friend then the ex will use her friend's page to creep on his FB page. The best option IMHO is to ignore them both. Link to post Share on other sites
Sunshine87 Posted January 12, 2013 Share Posted January 12, 2013 Update 2. A few months later, I randomly sent her a email calling her a whore. No response A few months later, I wish her Happy New Years Her: Because of your last email, I don't think we can be cool Me: Your twoface No response for 2 months Her: Where did you buy XYZ Me: You can buy it here. 5 days later Her: You know you could always send it to me to save me money Me: I would love to help but I lost it a few years ago. I think like the above poster said, she was trying to feel me out. I dunno. And thats the final end of this chapter, The End. I got closure, yeah baby! Hmmm, I think you need to move on from this girl. Have you tried therapy? Link to post Share on other sites
Author listen_to_me_please Posted January 12, 2013 Author Share Posted January 12, 2013 I'm good now. Was just updating you folks. In the last 5 years maybe spoke to that girl a total of less than a hour. Don't think I need therapy, 5 years ago that would of been a great suggestion, these days I'm ok. Link to post Share on other sites
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