northern_sky Posted November 23, 2010 Share Posted November 23, 2010 He semi cancelled on me and said he was feeling sick. I was expecting something like that from him. I sent him an email that basically said I get the sense you lost interest. even though what we have is casual, it seems like the timing is bad or the spark's not there for you anymore. He's moving in a month and a half anyway (to a city that's a three hour drive from where I live), so the email was almost unnecessary. It was more for my closure than anything else. We could have seen each other, since I'll be moving there in a few months. But I felt like I needed to end it now if was going to die or already dead. Sort of like kicking a soldier lying on a battlefield to see if it jerks. I feel sadder than I expected. I last saw him on Saturday night, and while he was holding me -- it sounds crazy, since we've only seen each other about ten times over two months -- I felt something akin to love. There was a moment where his hand was sort of possessively grabbing my shoulder as we fell asleep, and I imagined what it would be like to be his. It was too painful to take anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
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