WTH is wrong with me?!

[love00]

I met the woman im seeing at a divorce group. It was our heartache that started our friendship. About 4 months later it started to become more than just friends, we became intimate with each other. The relationship crossed the friendship boundary but it never really turned into boyfriend/girlfriend, committed relationship. Things felt like they were getting serious, especially with the holidays coming and it freaked me out a bit. I care for her very much, I have this connection with her that i havent felt with anyone else in a long time, but I dont "love" her. No keep in mind, Ive gone through a lot with my divorce and love is something that I just dont throw around. I also question if I will ever love anyone again, given the heartache ive been through. I came out of a 11 year marriage and getting serious with the first person im with started to make me question things. Am I doing the right thing? Should I date other people? Etc. Its been on my mind on how I should handle this and I felt like maybe I need to step back a bit. I had a talk with her the other day about how I feel, how confused I am, maybe we should see other people, etc. She seemed very understanding and was glad that I was being truthful with her. I said I dont want to do anything to jeopardize our friendship and we should stop being intimate until I get my head straight. Well the next day I started feeling this emptiness inside me, started thinking about her more, feeling like I may lose her, etc. So that brings me to the thread title, WTH is wrong with me? One day I want to put the breaks on and step back from her and the next day I want to see her and dont let her go. The fear I have is falling in love with the wrong person again. I wonder if dating other people would show how I truly feel for her but I also risk losing her to someone else she may meet. I know I cant have my cake and eat it to, is what im feeling normal or am I going crazy?! What if she is the person I could spend the rest of my life with? I know most of these questions have to be answered by me, Im just a very confused person right now...

[Art_Critic]

Just go with the flow.. after divorce romances can very well be rebounds till you figure out if you want to take the leap again.

She is dealing with he after divorce feelings as well..

 

By the way.. why do you have M-35 in your signature line ?

[love00]

Just go with the flow.. after divorce romances can very well be rebounds till you figure out if you want to take the leap again.

She is dealing with he after divorce feelings as well..

 

By the way.. why do you have M-35 in your signature line ?

 

Up until my talk with her, I was thinking about all the things I didn't like about her. Now I am thinking about all the good things, the things that attracted me to her. After my divorce, I made a list of things I wanted in the person in my next relationship, someone who is family oriented, likes to be active, etc. She meets some of these but not all. I question if its realistic to think I will find someone with all these qualities. A friend told me that if I dont love her, I should let her go, that its to convenient to stay with her given how we met. I dont believe in love at first sight, I do believe that love comes with time. I put M-35 in my sig so people would know my sex and age. I think age plays a big part in this because its a lot easier to find someone in your early 20s than it is in the mid 30s or older.

[ConstantCraving]

I met the woman im seeing at a divorce group. It was our heartache that started our friendship. About 4 months later it started to become more than just friends, we became intimate with each other. The relationship crossed the friendship boundary but it never really turned into boyfriend/girlfriend, committed relationship. Things felt like they were getting serious, especially with the holidays coming and it freaked me out a bit. I care for her very much, I have this connection with her that i havent felt with anyone else in a long time, but I dont "love" her. No keep in mind, Ive gone through a lot with my divorce and love is something that I just dont throw around. I also question if I will ever love anyone again, given the heartache ive been through. I came out of a 11 year marriage and getting serious with the first person im with started to make me question things. Am I doing the right thing? Should I date other people? Etc. Its been on my mind on how I should handle this and I felt like maybe I need to step back a bit. I had a talk with her the other day about how I feel, how confused I am, maybe we should see other people, etc. She seemed very understanding and was glad that I was being truthful with her. I said I dont want to do anything to jeopardize our friendship and we should stop being intimate until I get my head straight. Well the next day I started feeling this emptiness inside me, started thinking about her more, feeling like I may lose her, etc. So that brings me to the thread title, WTH is wrong with me? One day I want to put the breaks on and step back from her and the next day I want to see her and dont let her go. The fear I have is falling in love with the wrong person again. I wonder if dating other people would show how I truly feel for her but I also risk losing her to someone else she may meet. I know I cant have my cake and eat it to, is what im feeling normal or am I going crazy?! What if she is the person I could spend the rest of my life with? I know most of these questions have to be answered by me, Im just a very confused person right now...

 

I don't think there is anything wrong with you.

 

It makes sense that you want someone in your life BUT that you don't want to get your heart ripped out again.

 

Any guy who has ever been really into a woman and been rejected, dumped or dissed can relate to that.

 

I think you'll just have to take things really slow and be honest with women about your fears.