Guys: thoughts on young(20's) single moms

[sb129]

A man who is handsome in his 20s will remain handsome at least until his 40s.

 

While a woman's beauty will start to take a nose dive by her 30s.

 

Oh really? I am not so sure about that. I know lots of women in their 30s (and they aren't celebs who are paid to look good forever) who look better now than they ever have.

I am 33 and got hit on by a 26 year old the other day. (it was at work, and he was a slimeball, but still, it counts) I have also been told I am a MILF:laugh:

 

I also know a fair few guys in their 30s who let themselves go so that by the time they are 40 they have less hair and more gut.....

 

I agree. That's the best way to look at it. For a lot of people, having a child or children in their lives wouldn't mesh with their way of being. That's perfectly fair.

 

What I take issue with is the judgmental BS and assumptions.

 

Exactly. Everyone is entitled to their preferences. Its the blanket statements that p*ss me off.

[sb129]

It means there are exceptions to every rule.

 

Yes, there are. Even your "rules".

 

Ladies and gentlemen, I think AJ has conceded!

[sally4sara]

It means there are exceptions to every rule.

 

Wouldn't that apply to single mothers too making your opinion of it, after dating only one, being a crap situation that you should always avoid kind of contradictory to believing there are exceptions to every rule?

[AverageJoe]

Exactly. Everyone is entitled to their preferences. Its the blanket statements that p*ss me off.

 

Much like the following quote?

 

Oh really? I am not so sure about that. I know lots of women in their 30s (and they aren't celebs who are paid to look good forever) who look better now than they ever have.

I am 33 and got hit on by a 26 year old the other day. (it was at work, and he was a slimeball, but still, it counts) I have also been told I am a MILF:laugh:

 

No women is as hot in their early to late thirties, they were when they were in their early twenties. Still hot? Sure, but not when they were at a younger age.

[sweetjasmine]

A broken clock is right twice a day.

 

Tubal ligation failure rates range from 0.5% to 2%, depending on the type of procedure and the amount of time that has passed since the procedure. It's not unheard of for the Fallopian tubes to re-grow and reconnect. Those failure rates are comparable to most of the things you listed in your other post, and the risks associated with the procedure are much higher.

 

The only absolutely 100% fail-safe procedure is hysterectomy and/or oophorectomy.

[sally4sara]

Much like the following quote?

 

 

 

No women is as hot in their early to late thirties, they were when they were in their early twenties. Still hot? Sure, but not when they were at a younger age.

 

Can you explain to me why I got asked to the prom by a high school kid almost two years ago? You can't fake tuning the many shades of red this kid did after I told him I was 35.

[AverageJoe]

Yes, there are. Even your "rules".

 

Ladies and gentlemen, I think AJ has conceded!

 

I never said my rules were the standard. I can only speak in generalizations because we are speaking with a general forum.

 

As I said much earlier in this thread, there are exceptions to every rule. But that does not make the rule any less valid.

 

I like your enthusiasm, though.

[zengirl]

I never said my rules were the standard. I can only speak in generalizations because we are speaking with a general forum.

 

As I said much earlier in this thread, there are exceptions to every rule. But that does not make the rule any less valid.

 

I like your enthusiasm, though.

 

What grounds do you have to determine it's a "rule"?

[AverageJoe]

Can you explain to me why I got asked to the prom by a high school kid almost two years ago? You can't fake tuning the many shades of red this kid did after I told him I was 35.

 

No I cant, only he knows the answer to that. I could speculate but I am sure you would not agree.

[AverageJoe]

What grounds do you have to determine it's a "rule"?

 

The large amount of evidence that points to it. Even the small sample on this thread proves that many men will not date a single mom.

[sb129]

No women is as hot in their early to late thirties, they were when they were in their early twenties. Still hot? Sure, but not when they were at a younger age.

 

 

This doesn't make sense. My quote wasn't a "blanket statement"...I also know people who haven't aged that well, men and women.

 

If anything, I think I look better than I did when I was in my early 20s.

 

Back then I didn't appreciate what I had and I didn't make the most of it.

I dressed to the fashion of the time, instead of to my body shape, and I didn't have the money to spend on grooming and decent haircuts/ clothes.

 

I have probably "passed my peak of youth", yes. However I don't think that means I am less attractive because of it.

 

I don't particularly want to attract 26 year old men either. So I am quite OK with not being as "hot" as a 21 year old. Losing that flush of youth to wisdom and life experience has been a fair trade IMO.

[sally4sara]

No I cant, only he knows the answer to that. I could speculate but I am sure you would not agree.

 

Speculate away there Joe if you'd like. The kid apologized and scooted back over to his friends upon which I heard an incensed "35!?" from one of the others. I recognized the kid. He'd been around a few times earlier that week and I remembered wondering why a teenage boy would spend so many days in a row hanging around a floral shop when he'd never placed an order for flowers with me or made any purchases. I thought he was shoplifting perhaps.

 

I look like a kid when I wear a ball cap and no makeup. My son's friends (and some of there mothers ) have all asked me how old I am.

[zengirl]

The large amount of evidence that points to it. Even the small sample on this thread proves that many men will not date a single mom.

 

And yet many single moms go on dates. And I've known many childless men who dated a single mom. The very small sample on a thread like this cannot constitute much of a "rule" in the broader sense of general society.

 

I do think there are many people (myself included) who are reticient, for various reasons, of dating someone with children. But your "rule" that they won't or that they'd have to be desperate or whatever your "rule" even is has very little substance. . . That was my point.

[112233]

Back then I didn't appreciate what I had and I didn't make the most of it.

I dressed to the fashion of the time, instead of to my body shape, and I didn't have the money to spend on grooming and decent haircuts/ clothes.

 

We're talking about what looks good to STRAIGHT guys. Your clothes don't matter.

[112233]

And yet many single moms go on dates. And I've known many childless men who dated a single mom.

 

If she puts out she's great for dating, but I think the OP is wanting to be courted as if she's some fresh spring virgin. Can't see that happening, but maybe she'll get lucky. Or she can play the lottery, that might work out too.

[sally4sara]

And yet many single moms go on dates. And I've known many childless men who dated a single mom. The very small sample on a thread like this cannot constitute much of a "rule" in the broader sense of general society.

 

I do think there are many people (myself included) who are reticient, for various reasons, of dating someone with children. But your "rule" that they won't or that they'd have to be desperate or whatever your "rule" even is has very little substance. . . That was my point.

 

Indeed. If guys tend towards being less communicative, especially in regards to relationship woes - The ones that have been hurt badly enough to seek out a pink and red relationship forum probably have a highly skewed and suspicious view of women they're dealing with. That they'd be less willing to take risks in situations I too agree carry more complications only stands to reason.

 

And the ones who are too well adjusted and happy to come here won't be weighing in now will they?

[jimbo]

Ok My post now is not so much about young single mothers, although my grandmother was one, with 3 boys.

 

It is directed to those who feel that single mothers are never a good choice.

 

My grandmother met a man after her boys were fully grown, although due to financial constraint I don't think they had quite moved out yet. So they were men, possibly wives living at home.

 

She met a man, who had never had children of his own, and stayed by her side for 50yrs until he passed away last christmas. He had an active exciting life before he met her and an active exciting life while they were together. They were essentially the same age. He said that the 50years with her were the best of his life, and that he was very thankful to be included into her family and see her grandchildren as his own.

 

They were never held back by the fact she had previously had kids. They travelled the world, living and working in many countries and made there fortune together. There wasn't a day he didn't tell her he loved her. I believe he was very happy.

 

One thing a woman who has had and raised children, that someone who wasn't may not have, is an experience of selflessness (the ability to put the needs of another before your own), and a maturity that stems from not being free to do as she chooses every moment of the day.

 

Please consider that before making any blanket rules regarding your life. But as always do as you will, and I wish you all the best.

 

The exception, not the rule. Also, different type of people 50 years ago now. Most people now don't want to work on things. When something isn't right, they just say NEXT!

[Seamless74]

No women is as hot in their early to late thirties, they were when they were in their early twenties. Still hot? Sure, but not when they were at a younger age.

 

wholeheartedly disagree with that... I think alot of them look better.

[112233]

Can you explain to me why I got asked to the prom by a high school kid almost two years ago? You can't fake tuning the many shades of red this kid did after I told him I was 35.

 

Well clearly you are the one exception, the single rose who isn't wilting, you are unique and as ageless as .... well maybe that. Or maybe the kid is a dolt.

[jimbo]

People should never settle for less to begin with, man or women. I certainly dont. Everyone has parameters set for themselves as to what is acceptable and what is not. In my case, one of them is dating a single mother (I did it once). Just as everyone else has their own set of parameters.

 

Unfortunately people settle all of the time and then later on down the line, the relationship begins to falter simply because someone has compromised themselves. Then they try to desperately make the relationship work no matter how destructive it may be. The word investment or invested gets tossed around quite a bit at that point.

 

Sadly, if only one WANTS to make it work, it will not. Just like being prego, you need two to tango.

[musemaj11]

Oh really? I am not so sure about that. I know lots of women in their 30s (and they aren't celebs who are paid to look good forever) who look better now than they ever have.

I am 33 and got hit on by a 26 year old the other day. (it was at work, and he was a slimeball, but still, it counts) I have also been told I am a MILF:laugh:

 

I also know a fair few guys in their 30s who let themselves go so that by the time they are 40 they have less hair and more gut.....

Yea right.

 

A man and a woman of equal beauty who both take care of themselves, chances are the man will remain beautiful longer than the woman.

 

This is a universally accepted fact. You can come up with the whatever exceptions you want, but generally this is the truth.

[AverageJoe]

 

I do think there are many people (myself included) who are reticient, for various reasons, of dating someone with children. But your "rule" that they won't or that they'd have to be desperate or whatever your "rule" even is has very little substance. . . That was my point.

 

I appreciate the brevity.

 

Simply put, you are not male. You do not talk among men with various discussions. Fart jokes, dick jokes, and talks of the type of women men want to date that you just are not privy to. I have had the 'single mom' discussion with many, many men. Maybe I could ask you to trust me on that one.

 

My opinion is your point is unfounded. Doubtful we will agree, so lets leave it at that.

 

Speculate away there Joe if you'd like.

 

Maybe he thought you were easy. Maybe he thought you were a milf. Maybe he was trying to prove a point to some of his age group peers. Maybe he thought you looked desperate and was in need of a date. Maybe he didnt see you fifteen years ago. Maybe he was a loser (you shot him down). Maybe in his eyes, he thought you were hot. Ad nauseum.

 

All speculation of course.

[sb129]

We're talking about what looks good to STRAIGHT guys. Your clothes don't matter.

 

Ah bollocks. Women who dress to their body type look better than those who don't. To everyone.

 

Yea right.

 

A man and a woman of equal beauty who both take care of themselves, chances are the man will remain beautiful longer than the woman.

 

This is a universally accepted fact. You can come up with the whatever exceptions you want, but generally this is the truth.

 

Its not a "fact". Its your "opinion". Mine is different to yours. Boo Hoo for you.

 

I don't really care anyway, I am 33 and proud. I know I look good for my age, and I don't give a sh*t about trying to compete with 20-something girls OR impressing guys who only think that 20 somethings are hot.

[AverageJoe]

Sadly, if only one WANTS to make it work, it will not.

Very true, no question about it. Yet some people resort to any crazy compromise just to try to make a failing relationship work.

 

Just like being prego, you need two to tango.

 

Disagree, it takes two to be responsible.

[zengirl]

I appreciate the brevity.

 

Simply put, you are not male. You do not talk among men with various discussions. Fart jokes, dick jokes, and talks of the type of women men want to date that you just are not privy to. I have had the 'single mom' discussion with many, many men. Maybe I could ask you to trust me on that one.

 

My opinion is your point is unfounded. Doubtful we will agree, so lets leave it at that.

 

You think you can speak to enough men to know what the rule is? Do you travel the globe asking men what they think about single Moms? Seriously. Opinions are not facts. Opinions are not rules. Opinions are not even rules and facts about opinions.