Pregnant and Alone Again

[idunno]

OK...this is terribly annoying. I just typed this whole thing, did a spell-check, then it refreshed w/out my message in it. So...here goes.

 

Danny and I broke up toward the end of December for a week or so...then we were kinda working things out when I tried to call him on New Year's, and he wouldn't answer his phone. All kinds of sordid imagines were plaguing my mind, so I stopped by his mother's house - he moved in w/ her after moving out of my place. ...and yes, he is 27 yrs old. I left a picture of him that I kept in my car on the front door.

 

As it turned out, he had apparently dropped his cell phone in something wet, as he called me from his mother's phone, crying. - keep in mind that he does not cry often. He begged me to come and see him, asked me to marry him, and yadda, yadda, yadda.

 

Well, on my way home, I had this strange urge to pick up a pregnancy test. I wasn't late - I was actually supposed to start the next day. However, I followed my intuition...and yes, it was a positive test. (He moved back home that night.)

 

When I told him, he kept wavering from elation to a full-blown anxiety attack. He decided that he was just thrilled w/ the whole thing. We started looking for a house together; he told my 2 kids that I already have, that he was going to be their new daddy. He told me to look up info on him adopting them and everything. He was calling me Mrs. (his last name).

 

Then he calls me up one night when he went out w/ his friends. He tells me that he cares about me a lot, but he isn't "IN LOVE" w/ me.

 

The next day, he completely changes his mind again. He comes home, tells me that he does love me more than anything, and that he is going to ask me to marry him. He tells me that when he looks down the aisle in his mind, he sees me walking toward him.

 

So...it's all good, right???

 

WRONG!!!

 

Then, two weeks ago, he doesn't come home that night. He had also stayed out late on the Wednesday night before, too. But on this Saturday night, he doesn't even call. I finally call him at 4:00 a.m. He turns off his phone.

 

The next morning, he moves out. No explanation. No nothing. - but he left a bunch of his stuff behind and wouldn't leave my key. He has an F-150, and he could have fit everything in there.

 

So...I didn't talk to him for the first week, then he called me for some reason. He has called me pretty much every day since then. He told me he wants to be in the room w/ me when I have the baby, and he is taking the day off that I have my sonogram.

 

He called me yesterday, and asked if he could get his amoxicillin (sp?) prescription from me. I told him sure. He came over, and it was really, really awkward. He started to take off his coat, but when I turned back around, it was back on. Then he left quickly after that.

 

Then he called me a few minutes later "to make sure I was ok". He said that I was acting strange. I said the same about him. He said that he didn't know how to act because he was supposed to hate me because we broke up, but he doesn't.

 

...I told him how my daughter was asking if he still loved me, and I wasn't sure what to say. He told me to tell her that he still does love me.

 

Aaaarrrgggghhh!!! What is going on? Please help me.

[befuddled11]

First of all, how long had you 2 been together, prior to the 1-week breakup in December?

 

You mentioned that you've already got 2 children. How was he with them? Did you EVER get any sense that he was maybe overwhelmed with you have children? (the whole "instant family" thing)

 

The week long breakup in December.....did one person initiate it more than the other?

 

What kind of things were you 2 "working out" that necessitated this temporary breakup?

 

Was it agreed upon at the time that it was only going to be "temporary"?

 

Okay.....the first thing that hit me when I read your post, was this bit about him not answering his phone on New Year's eve (red flag#1)....the lame-o story about him having dropped his cell phone in something wet (red flag #2.....couldn't he have at least borrowed someone else's phone to call and wish you a Happy New Year? Where was he that he had no way to contact you?...did he say WHERE he spent New Year's Eve?

His "crying" reaction seemed a bit "over the top" to me..particularly since he's not the type to cry, as you've said.......It would almost seem to me that he felt awfully guilty about "something" and that's what propelled the tears.

 

Now the fact that he's waffling back and forth, back and forth.

 

Many guys, during a temporary breakup, will go right out and meet someone..even if it's just for a fling. Now add to that, you 2 not being together at New Year's Eve..a night when people "go out"....he may have met someone, turned off his phone for obvious reasons (didn't want you to call...by the way, do you know for a FACT that his phone was hooped from it supposedly dropping into something wet? Did he get a new phone to replace it? )......didn't think it was wrong as you 2 were "temporarily not together"......and at this time, he's torn between someone new (the newness, the excitement) and something old/familiar, plus one with 2 kids and a new one on the way...TONS of responsibility and a lot less freedom.

 

Yes, you had kids when he met you....and they've always been there, but maybe in the back of his mind he didn't feel "tied down"..but now that you're expecting HIS child, he obviously can't walk away.......or not as easily. A lot of guys that age would feel overwhelmed at the prospect of having 3 kids, you know?

 

Has he ever cheated before? Any suspicious behavior in the past?

 

Perhaps the reason, when he moved out, that he didn't take all of his stuff and wouldn't give your key back is because he's "stuck" and doesn't know which way to turn......and he didn't want to totally close the door on you.

 

Any reason to suspect he's with someone? Do you live in a small town where if he was seeing someone, you'd hear about it?

[befuddled11]

Oops, not sure how I missed this paragraph in your post...it surely adds to the "suspicious" behavior:

 

"Then, two weeks ago, he doesn't come home that night. He had also stayed out late on the Wednesday night before, too. But on this Saturday night, he doesn't even call. I finally call him at 4:00 a.m. He turns off his phone."

 

Just out of curiosity, what's the scoop on this Amoxicillin prescription? (antibiotic) Any idea what it was prescribed for?