Robert Posted August 6, 2000 Share Posted August 6, 2000 ok i have been going out with my girlfriend for 4 1/2 months and we still havent hooked up! i dont know what to do anymore. She tells me that she wants to but then when its that moment and it seems perfect she doesnt do anything. Then i feel uncomfortble and get nervous. I know this is pathetic after 4 1/2 months but i dont know what else to do. i really need someones help. Thanx Link to post Share on other sites
Amber Posted August 6, 2000 Share Posted August 6, 2000 I don't think that pathetic is the word I would use to describe this situation. I would like to know how old you are??? I know that it may seem like this is a big deal, but I really don't think it is. Perhaps she has religious beliefs that are stopping her, or maybe she just isn't ready. I would suggest that you let it go, I mean, don't mention it anymore... don't put any unneeded pressure on her. Now, if she is taking you to the top of the mountain, and not pushing you over the edge, you may need to think perhaps she is just teasing you to see you squirm. Unless I knew her, its hard to say. I wish you luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Robert Posted August 6, 2000 Share Posted August 6, 2000 I don't think that pathetic is the word I would use to describe this situation. I would like to know how old you are??? I know that it may seem like this is a big deal, but I really don't think it is. Perhaps she has religious beliefs that are stopping her, or maybe she just isn't ready. I would suggest that you let it go, I mean, don't mention it anymore... don't put any unneeded pressure on her. Now, if she is taking you to the top of the mountain, and not pushing you over the edge, you may need to think perhaps she is just teasing you to see you squirm. Unless I knew her, its hard to say. I wish you luck. im 15 years old, almost 16 (same with my gf) iknow for a fact that she wants to do it. we talk about it on the phone all the time. and the big thing is is that we have been talking about it for the past 2 1/2 months and still nothing has happened. this not being abble to happen makes us both a little uncomfortable whyen we are with eac other. she is coming over tonight, what should i do?? Link to post Share on other sites
billy the kid Posted August 6, 2000 Share Posted August 6, 2000 geeeezzzz I hope one of you has a condom or two or three... you are just kids I mean no offence so don't worry about doing it neither of you knows about your own personal wants or real feeling yet so stick with just fooling around with your hands and if it really comes to it just oral...... and what I mean by this is a lot of talking ... and then just the oral sex thing while talking alot.. it really works......leave the envelope thing alone for a while.... im 15 years old, almost 16 (same with my gf) iknow for a fact that she wants to do it. we talk about it on the phone all the time. and the big thing is is that we have been talking about it for the past 2 1/2 months and still nothing has happened. this not being abble to happen makes us both a little uncomfortable whyen we are with eac other. she is coming over tonight, what should i do?? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 6, 2000 Share Posted August 6, 2000 Robert: Take a hint. This girl is not yet ready for the sex act. She is just a child, like you. As a matter of fact, in some states a teenager 18 or older could get 25 years in prison for having sex with her. That's how serious this is. Take your time. If you are exceptionally horny, find an older chick who is experienced and go for it. But for now, be considerate of this girl's feelings and values. Back off. Respect her. If you can't respect her, her wishes, and her beliefs, she doesn't need you around. Link to post Share on other sites
Amber Posted August 7, 2000 Share Posted August 7, 2000 I don't mean to be rude, but you are so young. Why are you so worried about this? If you like her as a person, give it time... whats the rush? I am going to assume that you are a virgin... which would explain all of this sexual anxiety.? I may be wrong, but I know that peer pressure to become a MAN is really rough these days (I have a brother) and I will tell you what I told him. (girlz point of view) Even though your girlfriends BODY may be saying yes, but her heart may be saying no. I have to agree with Billy. Stick to the non "pentatrative" acts. Until you both have the maturity to deal with the real thing. Let me ask you something... how would you take care of a baby if she got pregnant??? It does happen... I got pregnant at 16, and it was horrible. I wish you luck and hope that your hormones don't convince you to do something your head and heart will regret. Link to post Share on other sites
Robert Posted August 7, 2000 Share Posted August 7, 2000 I don't mean to be rude, but you are so young. Why are you so worried about this? If you like her as a person, give it time... whats the rush? I am going to assume that you are a virgin... which would explain all of this sexual anxiety.? I may be wrong, but I know that peer pressure to become a MAN is really rough these days (I have a brother) and I will tell you what I told him. (girlz point of view) Even though your girlfriends BODY may be saying yes, but her heart may be saying no. I have to agree with Billy. Stick to the non "pentatrative" acts. Until you both have the maturity to deal with the real thing. Let me ask you something... how would you take care of a baby if she got pregnant??? It does happen... I got pregnant at 16, and it was horrible. I wish you luck and hope that your hormones don't convince you to do something your head and heart will regret. im not talkin about sex, im tlakin about hooking up...ya know the old french kiss thing going on, a little tongue, ya know. im not ready for sex! i want someone to help with HOOKING UP! it just wont happen....hooking up,not sex! thanx again Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 7, 2000 Share Posted August 7, 2000 Well, Robert... Have you every thought about just going for it. French kissing is not really such a big deal...well, maybe the first time. My first time, as I recall, was pretty good. It was spontaneous and just happened out in front of a restaurant. The girl has just had a few drinks and really didn't care. You have absolutely nothing to lose by just gradually working your tongue in there slowly...and softly...and see what her response is. If she resists, then respect that and wait until she is ready. You can even talk to her about it when the time is right. When you talk to her about hooking up, make sure it is clear to her than you mean french kissing and not sex. Hooking up sounds like jolly fun!!! By the way, exactly what word do you use for sex...locking up??? Link to post Share on other sites
Wiser Woman Posted August 10, 2000 Share Posted August 10, 2000 Well, we all read this one wrong, didn't we? I read all the posts and figured he was talking about sex too! So, you've been talking to each other for 2 1/2 months about FRENCH KISSING??? Next time you're talking about it, move your lips close to hers, brush them lightly, keep talking up close, kinda murmuring/mumbling about how wonderful she is and then just take your tongue, slide it ever so lightly over her upper or lower lip or both and gauge her reaction. If she doesn't run screaming from you at that point, then you might be able to move on to the next step. Then go back to the lips again for a while then try again ever so gently, kissing her lips in between, not just concentrating on getting your tongue in her mouth. Don't just jam your tongue into her mouth or force her any further than she wants to go with it. If she meets your tongue with hers, even tentatively, then you'll know if she wants to really give it a go. Each couple has their own way of kissing and what they enjoy. Experimentation is about the only way to learn as long as you don't put her in a position where she's not comfortable with whatever you're trying. Too many people take what they see in movies and consider that kissing and, in my opinion, it looks stinky!. Everytime I see a couple in a movie kiss there's this big open mouth thing going on where all the lips seem to miss their target. Lips are on your face to be touched by other lips, not enveloped like one is eating an apple or something! There's nothing so exciting as feeling someone else's lips actually ON yours, not trying to suck your lips down their mouth. And when it moves from lips to tongue, it gets even better as long as it's not a forced thing. Link to post Share on other sites
LoveAngel Posted August 12, 2000 Share Posted August 12, 2000 Hooking up sounds like jolly fun!!! By the way, exactly what word do you use for sex...locking up??? Perhaps a good resource to have on this site would be some sort of Romance Lingo reference guide. Anyone want to help out? LoveAngel Link to post Share on other sites
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