poorguy Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 I actually posted this on another forum not thinking...But what is everyone going to do if they are in NC and the ex texts a "Merry Christmas"....We all no NC is NC bit Christmas is the mother of all holidays. So what do you do and what are you going to do??? Link to post Share on other sites
Leandro Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 Seriously man? Do you have no capacity for independent thought? Have you lost that much conviction in your own ability to make decisions you need to ask others if you can say Merry Christmas back? He asked what WE are going to do Durkadurka. Not what HE should do. Poorguy, IF my ex contacts me that day, I will not reply. It won't be easy. I really doubt she will say anything to me though. Link to post Share on other sites
Author poorguy Posted December 13, 2010 Author Share Posted December 13, 2010 Thanks Leandro... You know it's such a big holiday Link to post Share on other sites
Leandro Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 Thanks Leandro... You know it's such a big holiday yea it is. But it's really up to you. We can't make you reply or not IF she contacts you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author poorguy Posted December 13, 2010 Author Share Posted December 13, 2010 i still want to know what everyone else is going to do Link to post Share on other sites
durkadurka Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 Well my ex is broke. Part of the reason we broke up. So I'm actually sending her and her family a bunch of small token Christmas gifts because I'm not an ass. I actually feel really bad for them. Link to post Share on other sites
WTRanger Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 I'm not going to say squat. More than likely that's a bulk Merry Christmas text. Unless Merry Christmas is followed by, "I was visited by 3 ghosts last night and I'm sorry for being so selfish and flaking on you." she is just fishing for attention. I won't even give her coal in her stocking, because at least coal is a gift. She gets nothing, zero, zilch, zip, nadda. Link to post Share on other sites
Author poorguy Posted December 13, 2010 Author Share Posted December 13, 2010 So that's one poster sending gifts and 2 other posters who won't respond. I' still debating which is why I posted this to see lol Link to post Share on other sites
YellowShark Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 I will do nothing except DELETE her text. Seriously. You think I am going to wish the person who ripped my heart out and stomped on it a Merry Xmas? Really? No f-ing way man! (I ain't no hypocrite, and frankly she lost those "Happy Birthdays" and "Merry Xmas's" when she chose to cheat... twice.) Link to post Share on other sites
bl22 Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 Unless Merry Christmas is followed by, "I was visited by 3 ghosts last night and I'm sorry for being so selfish and flaking on you." she is just fishing for attention. I won't even give her coal in her stocking, because at least coal is a gift. She gets nothing, zero, zilch, zip, nadda. hahaha funny Link to post Share on other sites
paleblue Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 I would be ignoring her if I heard from her. I find it pointless to bother responding. Link to post Share on other sites
angelboots Posted December 13, 2010 Share Posted December 13, 2010 I will also be ignoring it, if they send u a merry Christams after a period of NC they are probably just testing the waters to see if you will reply to that since it is Christmas and really it is a weakening of resolve to respond to anything they say. To reply would simply validate to my ex that i am thinking of him in a less negative light, or that I am completely drunk and full of regret and want him back. More pain then its worth in my opinion. Even more so if it is a group Christams message and you do respond, how would you feel if they didn't respond to your reply? You would feel like they stole your NC power and you would feel disappointed. I dont think holidays are an excuse to break no contact. But thats just my feelings and everyones situation is different. Link to post Share on other sites
skydiveaddict Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 she can't text me, I blocked her # Link to post Share on other sites
dng Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 I'm not mad at her. I think she's a good egg, and we both tried very hard over the years, just not at the same time. She can't text me cause I blocked her # (constant 3-4-5am calls), but even if she could I think I would feel a little heat in my heart and then delete it. It can only start another pointless cycle of us discovering why we dont get along anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
cerridwen Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 I will be tempted to respond but I will delete it with no reply. After the text arrives (and I know it will) before I let the warm fuzzy feelings invade, I'm going to think of the crappy things he did near the end. THAT reality is the more accurate one. Link to post Share on other sites
fiat500 Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 I learned this lesson hard from my very first ex. DO NOT RESPOND to their holiday text. They're basically saying: "Merry Christmas. I still don't give a f**k about you ." Link to post Share on other sites
redy2 Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 ignore it. which i should have done at thanksgiving. because she begged me to come see her so i drove 11 hrs one way. to be stood up. then she showed up the next day and she staged a huge argument then stormed off and i had to drive 11 hrs hime. Link to post Share on other sites
DagnyTaggart Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 Ignore. It will be hard. That's what I'm going to do. By that time it will be close to 45 days NC for me. No way am I going to screw that up. I worked too hard to come this far. Link to post Share on other sites
melenkurion Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 I'd ignore it if I got it... I won't get one, of course. He's spending Christmas Day with the guy he cheated on me with the whole summer. He doesn't care about me not even a tiny little bit. Link to post Share on other sites
homebrew Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 Regardless if I were to be contacted by my EX or not, my happiness and the outcome of my Christmas will be solely determined by me and nobody else. My ex does not have my permission nor do I give her the power to tell me how to think or feel and she certainly is not going to determine if I have a good Christmas or not! Speaking of Christmas... This is my Christmas wish for all of you: That you would be recovered and healed. That you are over the relationship and the feelings that you have for your EX. That you would find yourself... the person you were before you met your EX. Link to post Share on other sites
Author poorguy Posted December 14, 2010 Author Share Posted December 14, 2010 I learned this lesson hard from my very first ex. DO NOT RESPOND to their holiday text. They're basically saying: "Merry Christmas. I still don't give a f**k about you ." "Merry Christmas. I still don't give a f_ck about you" That's awesome! Maybe if I do respond because I know I'll get a text on that day I'll say something like that to her Link to post Share on other sites
Gaberzilla Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 Regardless if I were to be contacted by my EX or not, my happiness and the outcome of my Christmas will be solely determined by me and nobody else. My ex does not have my permission nor do I give her the power to tell me how to think or feel and she certainly is not going to determine if I have a good Christmas or not! Speaking of Christmas... This is my Christmas wish for all of you: That you would be recovered and healed. That you are over the relationship and the feelings that you have for your EX. That you would find yourself... the person you were before you met your EX. I like this Homebrew. Your happiness depends and YOU and only YOU. I really starting to learn that. Thanks for the Christmas wish. I really need that! I have been NC for 2 months now. Getting better but still very sad at times. MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author poorguy Posted December 14, 2010 Author Share Posted December 14, 2010 So to respond or not to respond? Link to post Share on other sites
homebrew Posted December 14, 2010 Share Posted December 14, 2010 So to respond or not to respond? If you have to ask the question... I think you know the answer without me telling you. But in case you do... When you first dated her or any girl for that matter... Did you come on LS and ask us how to proceed? I doubt it. You are not "there" yet... Keep up the good work. I know it sucks, but you have to get YOU back and be OVER them completely before you have any chance of success. Link to post Share on other sites
Author poorguy Posted December 14, 2010 Author Share Posted December 14, 2010 If you have to ask the question... I think you know the answer without me telling you. But in case you do... When you first dated her or any girl for that matter... Did you come on LS and ask us how to proceed? I doubt it. You are not "there" yet... Keep up the good work. I know it sucks, but you have to get YOU back and be OVER them completely before you have any chance of success. Thanks...This isn't all about me here even a little...I want to know what everyone else's intentions are with the topic. I'm not looking for advice per se for myself Link to post Share on other sites
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