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Did my girlfriend cheat?


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I think that the inappropriate thing to do is to ignore this whole situation. Two people who are in love and in a committed relationship should be able to talk about ANYTHING openly and honestly. This is a big deal for me, condoms aren't 100 percent effective against protecting from STD's. I already have health problems, I don't need my preexisting condition compounded by an STD. Hence, I feel that I am justified in knowing the truth.

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Ding Ding Ding which is all the conjecture that another man was spewing his throat yogurt in there. I would of given her the benefit of the doubt if it wasnt for her lieing about it.

 

Time out. That was not meant as an implication for CHEATING. It was in response to whether or not her and her BOYFRIEND may have had a pregnancy scare.

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Star Gazer... If she can't tell the guy she is sleeping with this VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION HE DESERVES to KNOW... Then she shouldn't be having sex in the first place.

 

I don't care if she feels like talking about it or not... She has a responsibility too!

 

Just like I have a responsibility to tell her if I have an STD!

 

This is comparing apples and oranges.

 

Yes, Pepto and Plan B are different, and apples and oranges in their own way, but I used those two different medications as an example to explain her potential embarrassment and secretiveness.

 

Here, him having an STD and her contraception choices are truly apples and oranges when it comes to "deserves to know."

 

If he has an STD, that means he can give her the STD. Thus, he's duty bound to disclose. She truly deserves to know that, in order to protect herself.

 

What I disagree with is the idea that he deserves to know about her choice to purchase Plan B. He doesn't deserve to know anything about her Plan B purchase UNTIL there's a "problem" - an actual pregnancy. Up until she gets a positive on her pregnancy test, what she does to protect herself from pregnancy is her business and her business alone. Only if she becomes pregnant does he deserve to know anything. If he wants to know if she's using contraception like the pill before they even have sex, he can ask. But she's not duty bound to disclose if she misses it, or needs Plan B for other reasons (like antibiotics, etc.).

 

I just thought of something!!!

 

If you throw up your pill, it's ineffective. At that point, she might have chosen to take Plan B. When you're hungover, you often throw up. Hmph.

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If my girlfriend cares about my well-being she will have no problem telling me why it was purchased. She knows how sick I was, and that I was approximately an hour away from dying.

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An STD that can be caught from ANOTHER partner via cheating is very different than one's choice in contraception.

 

 

Sorry, but the women I've been with never jumped out of the bed after we finished and had a pharmacy's worth of Plan B pills in the medicine cabinet.

 

PLan B is an EMERGENCY contraception. Ergo the title "Plan B" because plan A failed or wasn't used.

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This thread wouldn't exist if she said something like "hey honey I went ahead and and purchased some plan b the other day because blah blah blah...."

 

The whole point and issue here is that she LIED about it. Were all adults and we all know you don't lie unless your hiding something. At least I think thats why....

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Okay, this is not looking good.

 

The timing -- we know the following all happened on the same day:

She's hungover

She or one of her roomies does a search on Plan B

She buys Plan B on her credit card

 

She is hungover so she's not just buying it for a possible future slip-up... you don't go out buying something like that when you are down and blah (hungover) for a possible future slip-up. So I don't believe that.

 

Here are the possible scenarios:

 

a) Most likely: she did cheat on you

 

The following are less likely but definitely possible:

 

b) She bought the Plan B on her credit card for the roomie doing the search. Are her roomies short of cash? This would be unlikely if her roomies have a lot of money and would never require the use of someone else's credit card. In this case, she may not even have known the name of what exactly was bought on the card. Or she may have thought it really was none of your business what her friend was dealing with, hence the lie.

 

This will likely be her defense when you confront her with what you have found. So you really need to be prepared for that.

 

c) There is some sort of rape scenario. This is so awful to imagine. I really hope this is not the case.

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I know. That's why part of it doesn't make sense. If he didn't actually cum inside her, she wouldn't really have a need for Plan B.

 

And yet she's also on the pill. Condoms, plus the pill. This girl is obviously hyper vigilant against pregnancy. Another reason to get Plan B.

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If my girlfriend cares about my well-being she will have no problem telling me why it was purchased. She knows how sick I was, and that I was approximately an hour away from dying.

 

Dying, how so?

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I think that the inappropriate thing to do is to ignore this whole situation. Two people who are in love and in a committed relationship should be able to talk about ANYTHING openly and honestly. This is a big deal for me, condoms aren't 100 percent effective against protecting from STD's. I already have health problems, I don't need my preexisting condition compounded by an STD. Hence, I feel that I am justified in knowing the truth.

 

 

BINGO!!! And you should have the truth, whatever the truth is!

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Dying, how so?

 

Intestinal perforation and a 104 degree fever due to the "stuff" that leaked out of my intestines. I have Crohn's disease.

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Sorry, but the women I've been with never jumped out of the bed after we finished and had a pharmacy's worth of Plan B pills in the medicine cabinet.

 

PLan B is an EMERGENCY contraception. Ergo the title "Plan B" because plan A failed or wasn't used.

 

Just because you haven't experienced it doesn't mean it doesn't happen ALL. THE. TIME.

 

Repeat:

 

You may be on to something here. She has missed her birth control before.

 

I'm not gonna lie, I have it in my medicine cabinet right now...
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Intestinal perforation and a 104 degree fever due to the "stuff" that leaked out of my intestines. I have Crohn's disease.

 

Ouch! I'm sorry to hear that. :(

 

I don't mean to suggest that you aren't justified in wanting to know, and I definitely do think at this point you need to talk to her about it. I just hope you approach this conversation with a very open mind, not looking to confirm a preconceived notion that she's been cheating on you.

 

I mean, I very well could be wrong. Wouldn't be the first time. ;) But I hope I'm not. I hope her experience is very similar to mine. :)

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Intestinal perforation and a 104 degree fever due to the "stuff" that leaked out of my intestines. I have Crohn's disease.

 

Did your intestines rupture as a result of having sex with her?

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Condom + Pill = Luke Skywalker Outfit, come on, shes worried about getting pregnant with that proverbial battle fortress up ?

 

As it was mentioned before, the girl forgets her pill sometimes and is on antibiotics. If I was on antibiotics I would absolutely go get some Plan B and continue to use condoms.

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If you throw up your pill, it's ineffective. At that point, she might have chosen to take Plan B. When you're hungover, you often throw up. Hmph.

 

I think this warrants consideration.

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So if I use Star Gazer's own arugement against her...

 

Her and I start dating... We start having sex with protection... I happen to have Herpes... I have a flair up... I take my Valtrax for a couple of days and tell her that I am tired so I don't have sex with her...

 

Because I believe it's MY PROBLEM ONLY... and I don't feel like talking about it with Star Gazer... I am justified in not sharing this with her.

 

Fast Forward... Star Gazer finds out through my credit card that I took Valtrax... Without me telling her... Couple of weeks later... Star Gazer has a full on case of Herpes which she will have for life... and not to mention the EMOTIONAL damage that it might cause for her life... possibly affecting how she has a kid, etc.

 

Star Gazer says to me... Don't worry baby... You didn't feel comfortable talking about that with me... So I totally understand! No problems on my end!

 

I guess it's safe to assume should she end up dating someone else that he find out about the fact that she has Herpes... because hey... She is embarrassed by it and it's only her problem!

 

 

Whether you like it or not... A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK taking a PLAN B pill is abortion... Abortion is a VERY EMOTIONAL ISSUE FOR BOTH MEN AND WOMEN... If I and anyone I know that found out their GF / WIFE took a PLAN B pill without talking / sharing that with them (REGARDLESS OF HOW THEY FOUND) out... They would be PISSED, HURT, UPSET... That is not counting on whether the fact they think they just lost a baby or not...

 

It is VERY a emotional issue and to just dismiss it as if the GUY has no right to know because SHE DOES FEEL comfortable is the biggest bunch of bullcrap I have ever heard!

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Uggh...your right Gazer, he shouldn't say anything. He should just let this go. Apparently in your opinion, his girlfriend choice of birth Control is none of his business.

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I think this warrants consideration.

 

Your disregard for her lying leads me to believe you may be a spy and possible friend of the OP's gf. Who are you realllly?

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So if I use Star Gazer's own arugement against her...

 

Her and I start dating... We start having sex with protection... I happen to have Herpes... I have a flair up... I take my Valtrax for a couple of days and tell her that I am tired so I don't have sex with her...

 

Because I believe it's MY PROBLEM ONLY... and I don't feel like talking about it with Star Gazer... I am justified in not sharing this with her.

 

Fast Forward... Star Gazer finds out through my credit card that I took Valtrax... Without me telling her... Couple of weeks later... Star Gazer has a full on case of Herpes which she will have for life... and not to mention the EMOTIONAL damage that it might cause for her life... possibly affecting how she has a kid, etc.

 

Star Gazer says to me... Don't worry baby... You didn't feel comfortable talking about that with me... So I totally understand! No problems on my end!

 

I guess it's safe to assume should she end up dating someone else that he find out about the fact that she has Herpes... because hey... She is embarrassed by it and it's only her problem!

 

 

Whether you like it or not... A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK taking a PLAN B pill is abortion... Abortion is a VERY EMOTIONAL ISSUE FOR BOTH MEN AND WOMEN... If I and anyone I know that found out their GF / WIFE took a PLAN B pill without talking / sharing that with them (REGARDLESS OF HOW THEY FOUND) out... They would be PISSED, HURT, UPSET... That is not counting on whether the fact they think they just lost a baby or not...

 

It is VERY a emotional issue and to just dismiss it as if the GUY has no right to know because SHE DOES FEEL comfortable is the biggest bunch of bullcrap I have ever heard!

 

Thanks HomeBrew. I am concerned about my well-being, my girlfriend's well-being, and the well-being of the relationship. That's my whole cause for concern.

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So if I use Star Gazer's own arugement against her...

 

Her and I start dating... We start having sex with protection... I happen to have Herpes... I have a flair up... I take my Valtrax for a couple of days and tell her that I am tired so I don't have sex with her...

 

Because I believe it's MY PROBLEM ONLY... and I don't feel like talking about it with Star Gazer... I am justified in not sharing this with her.

 

OMFG. That is not at all what I'm saying. You're twisting this horribly.

 

Having herpes is not just your problem only, and you know it. It's hers as well, before you even have sex with her. It's ALWAYS there. Comparing having an incurable STD to HER PERSONAL choice in contraception is just ridiculous. I'm not even going to comment any further.

 

We're not talking about having an incurable STD versus having an ABORTION. Now if THAT was what was at issue here, the comparison would be fair. But that's not what Plan B is, people. It's BIRTH CONTROL. It's literally the equivalent of 4 BC pills on one pill. Until/unless she's pregnant, IT DOES NOT AFFECT HIM.

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But shes in Ireland, and she shouldnt be having sex. Her BF even said he couldnt remember the last time they did the horizontal hustle.

 

She bought them on Dec 6th. Who knows if she took them to Ireland or used it right away.

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This is bad. Now the OP is/was terribly sick with Chrone's Disease...His intestines ruptured, and she left for Ireland while he was almost dying in the hospital. :confused:

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This is bad. Now the OP is/was terribly sick with Chrone's Disease...His intestines ruptured, and she left for Ireland while he was almost dying in the hospital. :confused:

 

No no, that happened to me 5 years ago. I told my girlfriend about it when we first started dating.

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