that girl Posted December 23, 2010 Share Posted December 23, 2010 I'm really curious about the genders of people answering. It seems like most of the guys see this as a huge red flag while most of those with uteruses realize there are a million reasons why you would google Plan B and the most likely one is not cheating on you with a one night stand. The fact that she went home to Ireland brings a whole different issue into it- the morning after pill is prescription only in Ireland and it is prescription only while in the US and most of Europe it is over the counter. It is completely possible an Irish friend asked her to pick it up. If you need to ask, just ask why she was googling Plan B which you noticed when you went to check her computer. But I think you're totally paranoid. Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 24, 2010 Author Share Posted December 24, 2010 (edited) I ended up crying and breaking down on the phone with my girlfriend a couple of days ago and ended up asking her about the Plan B google search. She said it wasn't her, and she didn't even know what it was until I explained it to her, she asked "what's plan B?" I responded, "an emergency contraceptive", then she asked, "like the morning after pill?" When I told her about how long it had been before I mustered up the courage to ask her she said that she wished that I asked her earlier and before she left because she had no idea that I was torturing myself (her words: she was glad that I asked her). Her computer is shared with other people, she said she didn't know who searched for it but assured me it wasn't her. The lines of communication between her and I have been open, she's been counting down the days until she comes home, and saying she misses me lots and loves me lots. If my girlfriend had a guilty conscience I don't think she would be counting down the days until she could see me again. Also, I don't know if this has any significance but, my girlfriend is pretty bad at keeping secrets, she's said so herself many times. She told me a big secret about her mom that she didn't want me to know about until we had been going out for a longer period of time. Edited December 24, 2010 by teardrop86 additional thoughts Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 (edited) I can't believe this is happening to me. I went over to my girlfriends house to drop her dog back because I was dog sitting last night, and I ended up snooping again and found that her visa bill had a 40 dollar charge on it from Shoppers Drug Mart done on December 7th (the day after Plan B was searched on google). I don't know what to do now, she's all the way in Ireland and she told me that she didn't know anything about it when I asked her. What do I do? I'm so scared and confused. Do I wait for her to come home to confront her about it on Saturday? Or do I bring it up with her on the phone when I talk to her next, most likely will be tomorrow? I feel like breaking down and crying right now, my gut was telling me something wasn't right, which led me to snoop further. Edited December 28, 2010 by teardrop86 Link to post Share on other sites
FryFish Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 TRUST YOUR GUT! What you do NOW is get checked for std's... Your slut of a gf is not only ****ING OTHER GUYS but is doing it WIHOUT PROTECTION and letting them FINISH INSIDE HER! I suggest you dont even confront her... You dont seem strong enough to resist the slew of lies she has in store for you... Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 (edited) I want to know the truth though. How do I ask her, and when do I ask her? One thing I want is closure if her and I are done. Edited December 28, 2010 by teardrop86 Link to post Share on other sites
FryFish Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 The truth is at least one other guy came inside her... She is a seasoned liar. You confronting her wont get her to talk. You best chance to get her to talk is to vanish from her life until she seeks you out... Seriously, no texts, calls or emails from you to her until she is at your doorstep... Then when she shows up, you dont ASK her anything. You tell her that you KNOW she had a pregnancy scare with another guy and that you decided you were better than her when she LIED to you about it on the phone. Then ask her to please leave... She will likely try to lie still... at which point you ask her to leave and you have your closure. Or she tells the truth... at which point you ask her to leave and you have your closure. Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 (edited) My heart is telling me that it's all coincidental. I want to ask her myself, I've been burned too many times, been cheated on two times already in my life. edit: The big issue is that I need to pick her up from the airport on Saturday. Also, she works for my uncle as a hair stylist, and I want to know the truth because he shouldn't be employing someone who might be a liar and a cheat, especially because she handles the money there too. My family are really attached to her as well, I can't fathom how I'm going to explain this to them if what happened is true. She is trusted by so many people in my life, this is troublesome. Edited December 28, 2010 by teardrop86 Link to post Share on other sites
FryFish Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 Your heart is an idiot! Your gut knows whats what! And of course you have never cum inside her without a condom... That right is reserved for hot, drunk strangers... You ARENT special to her. Look, by now, she has her story all worked out. If you ask her she is going to regurgitate her premade spiel now... Then you will have to ask why she didnt tell you this new "truth" when it first happened or tell you when you last asked... The answer to that is because the story hadnt been fabricated yet... Before you talk to her, go buy a plan b pill from the same store.... If the charge is identical you have your answer... if the charge is more than she paid then maybe it is all coincidence... If the charge is less... maybe she got a candybar. Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 I don't remember what the exact price was, it was either 41.20 or 41.80 on her bill. Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 The price on her visa bill was $41.43. I went to the exact store she did and it was selling for $41.43 with tax included. I'm broken now. I feel like a pile of crap. Why would she lie to me? Link to post Share on other sites
FryFish Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 She is a cheating lying skank. Why would she tell you the truth...? If you NEED a confession then go with my plan... Nothing else will do... because "she was buying it for a friend" if you ask her... Link to post Share on other sites
seibert253 Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 Confront her with your evidence, and don't let her try to turn it back onto you; "you've invaded my privacy", "I can't trust you", yada yada. If she wasn't lying and cheating, you wouldn't need to check up on her, plain in simple. If I were in your shoes, I'd pull a pre-emptive strike. I'd confront her, tell her you know she's lying, then tell her you cannot be with someone who is untrustworthy, untruthful, and unfaithful. Then walk out and leave. If she wants to work through this she will chase you down and come clean. If she does this, then you have to decide if you can work through this. If she doesn't, then you need to move on because she already has, with someone else. She just lacks the charactor to clue you in on it. Keep us updated. Peace, Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 The plan is that I'm going to try to talk to her as little as possible until she comes home. Then I will confront her with my evidence when she gets back. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 FYI, she will probably tell you that she bought it for a girlfriend who was too embarrassed that she had to use it to buy it herself. She will probably also tell you she pretended not to know what it was because her friend would be terribly embarrassed if anyone found out she'd needed it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 (edited) FYI, she will probably tell you that she bought it for a girlfriend who was too embarrassed that she had to use it to buy it herself. She will probably also tell you she pretended not to know what it was because her friend would be terribly embarrassed if anyone found out she'd needed it. That's one of my concerns. I am having serious doubts if I can even trust the explanation I will get from her. I'm going to talk to my uncle about this situation, she has worked for him for the last 3 years, and I'm hoping he can shed some more light on the situation. I told my mom about it as well, and she was shocked. She said it was very suspicious, and she also said my girlfriend doesn't seem like the type of girl to sleep with a random guy, she seems to think that my girlfriend bought it for a friend. Edited December 28, 2010 by teardrop86 Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 This is really bad news teardrop. You now know that she has no problem lying to you and I agree that she will tell you that she bought it for a friend. The fact that she has no problem lying to you is enough to end the relationship period. The chances are much greater that she purchased it for herself and she is playing you for a fool. Listen to your gut. I wish you luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 Yeah, the exact amount on her Visa is the same as the Plan B pill, doesn't look good. If it was for a roomate or friend she would have told you right on the phone, because she wouldn't have anything to hide. But, now she has a purchase on the credit card for the EXACT same price AND she played stupid to what it was.....not good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 My Uncle and my Mom seem to think that if I confront her face to face that she's the type of person who would have an difficult time lying to someones face. I'm hoping that when I talk to her about it on Saturday that she has enough love and respect for me to tell me the truth, whatever it may be. The best case scenario is that she did buy it for a friend and was told not to tell anyone. If she's willing to work with me on rebuilding the trust in our relationship, that would be something I would consider doing. But, if she cheated on me and admits it to me, the relationship will be over on the spot. Link to post Share on other sites
USCGAviator Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 Dude listen to yourself your trying to deny the truth. Looks at your evidence. She told you she didn't know what the plan b was. Yet she purchased it for a friend not knowing what it was? Come on man, who does that. You don't need an explanation for that. And the more you try to get an explanation from her the more more hysterical she will get that shes innocent. She'll even turn on the water works. Don't chump out!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 (edited) The two people who've known her longer than I have seem to think despite the evidence that she isn't the type of girl to do that. They both said that her and I need to talk like adults about this. My uncle said to not let my checkered past blur my vision. My mom said that this situation will either make or break our relationship. You can understand why I'm skeptical, I don't want to ruin my relationship unless I have no other options. There must be a way to prove my girlfriend bought Plan B for a friend, if that's what she tells me. Maybe if I tell her that I need concrete proof that it wasn't her who used it. I was thinking of putting her on the spot, asking her to call her friend and let me ask her myself. If she's innocent she should have no problem clearing the air this way. Edited December 28, 2010 by teardrop86 Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 Can't go that route. Girls talk and she probably told one of her her friends of what you've found out. Too much time has passed. So, if you ask this friend, chances are she'll cover for her. Link to post Share on other sites
FryFish Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 DUDE! She ****ED SOME OTHER GUY! If you plan on trying to work this **** out with her then GET USED TO IT! Most people dont expect that "so and so" is a heartless cheater... Most cheaters dont announce it to the world. In fact, most people would NOT think that most cheaters are cheaters... Especially if they have been the cheaters friend for any length of time... Look, searching for and BUYING the plan B pill IN SECRET isnt just a red flag... Its, "oops, that stranger came inside me and I dont want my boyfriend to find out I cheated"... Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 If she doesn't have a good explanation then I am wrestling with the idea that I may never be able to trust her again. Link to post Share on other sites
FryFish Posted December 28, 2010 Share Posted December 28, 2010 We already TOLD YOU what her explanation is gonna be... And by now she has had MORE than enough time to get at least one friend in on her scam... Probably one of the friends that already knew she ****ed some random guy from the club... The friends she went with KNOW it happened... They condoned it. They dont care that she cheated on you. They WILL cover for her! You are about to make yourself a complete chump... Link to post Share on other sites
Author teardrop86 Posted December 28, 2010 Author Share Posted December 28, 2010 I'm not going to be a chump. I want to hear her side of the story, whatever it may be. Then I will take my course of action. Link to post Share on other sites
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