Hopeful30 Posted December 19, 2010 Share Posted December 19, 2010 I have so many best guy friends that I love to DEATH and would do ANYTHING for them. But I don't hold their hands. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted December 20, 2010 Share Posted December 20, 2010 So what do you know...I get another curve ball. Today she was supposed to go xmas shopping with him. She texted me this morning and we text back n forth until early afternoon when I get a text response from her sister saying she has the phone for the day. I wouldn't really care but it just annoyed me that she never mentioned she was going to do that. Ive known her for 5 months and she's never lent her phone to her sister. So now she is shopping with her "friend" and is completely unavailable. Should I be upset and should I say anything when I see her tomorrow? Or am I being overly sensitive? That's shady. I can almost feel your frustration. Apparently this guy "friend" is more important than you. you said she said she wants you to meet him? If you wanted your girl to meet a friend of yours you'd pick up your phone and make it happen. After 5 months you still havn't met him? My wife had a guy friend she kept telling me I would meet. I never met him. she's now my ex-wife & living with him. Just saying. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 40 Fonzarelli Posted January 18, 2011 Author Share Posted January 18, 2011 That's shady. I can almost feel your frustration. Apparently this guy "friend" is more important than you. you said she said she wants you to meet him? If you wanted your girl to meet a friend of yours you'd pick up your phone and make it happen. After 5 months you still havn't met him? My wife had a guy friend she kept telling me I would meet. I never met him. she's now my ex-wife & living with him. Just saying. We finally met a couple nights ago. Needless to say, I did not enjoy the night. He was a nice guy, but my girl laughed and joked with him the whole night. I felt like the third wheel at times. She would occasionally kiss/touch me, but most of her attention was on him. I felt very jealous but didn't bring it up to her because it would sound very insecure. Am I wrong to feel this way? I guess im jealous of how well they get along. Do I bring this up? Could I be setting myself up for an emotional affair? I just wish I could keep my cool and just relax but I feel very vulnerable right now. Link to post Share on other sites
lamaman3 Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 Honestly - do you not have anything else important going on in your life that this is the kind of thing you spend your time worrying about? Whether she holds someone's hand or not? Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 Is she Asian? I only ask because it might be a cultural thing. My mum's friend's daughter came over from Asia last year and I had to entertain her so I took her into the city... she started holding my hand everywhere we went and I felt very uncomfortable so I kept trying to hold my bag on the side she was walking. Asian girls only hold other girls' hands, not male friends'.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author 40 Fonzarelli Posted January 18, 2011 Author Share Posted January 18, 2011 Well, we are set to all hang out again on thursday. Hopefully it goes better! BTW she has a thing for black guys and her friend is black. Not good haha Link to post Share on other sites
pookster72 Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 no, and i dont hold hands with my brothers either Link to post Share on other sites
Author 40 Fonzarelli Posted January 25, 2011 Author Share Posted January 25, 2011 Honestly - do you not have anything else important going on in your life that this is the kind of thing you spend your time worrying about? Whether she holds someone's hand or not? Would you be ok if your s/o held someone else's hand? Link to post Share on other sites
FryFish Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 Why is her best friend some DUDE SHE USED TO DATE? Dump her man, she will eventually **** this guy. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 Not a lady but have had my hand grabbed unexpectedly by three adult women so far, all of whom I'm sorry to say were married to other people. I might perhaps offer my arm to a lady, especially older women who are accustomed to walking that way with a man (my former MIL might be one example), even if not intimate with him, but don't voluntarily try to or actually hold hands with a woman I'm not deep into dating, in a relationship with or married to. I think that's a healthy boundary. YMMV Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 Hard to know really but I don't hold hands with my friends unless maybe they were really upset about something. I suppose the question is why did they decide to be just friends? Was it her choice or his? If it was hers, she doesn't seem to be going back to just friends entirely. I don't think I'd feel comfortable with it if my partner was regularly getting close to someone like that. Different people have different ideas though and most are more touchy-feely than me. Link to post Share on other sites
Eeyore79 Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 I found out that they started out dating but decided to just be friends. They kissed but never had sex. They talk/text regularly and they also hang out with just the two of them. She says she sees him like a brother and didn't really think holding hands was a big deal. She wants me to meet him as well. So she's hanging out with her ex, just the two of them... she texts and talks to him regularly... they hold hands... and you're okay with that? I wouldn't be happy with my partner hanging out with an ex by themselves, let alone holding an ex's hand! And she wants to emasculate you further by introducing you to him and expecting you to be friends with a guy who is disrespecting you by messing with your girlfriend? I think you need to insist that your girlfriend cuts contact with this guy; they are uncomfortably close and are behaving disrespectfully, and it's a slippery slope towards cheating. Do you really believe her when she says she hasn't slept with him? Somehow I doubt she's telling the truth... So I was thinking to myself, why would she continue doing something, knowing that it would bother me if I saw it? This is exactly the question you should be asking yourself. Why is she doing something when she knows it bothers you? She obviously doesnt care about your feelings that much... Link to post Share on other sites
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