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Still dealing with my DAD getting re-married...UGH


StreetDog

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I'm trying to be as understanding as i can, seriously...Trying to be

kind, caring, understanding but it's hard.

 

I posted bout this before.

 

My Dad who i'm not super close with is getting re-married after 15

years. I'm not super jazzed about it because he pursued a woman

who kept giving him the brush off, then he got desperate and

spur the moment asked her to marry him and she all the sudden said

yes. So then he bought a ring, keeps buying her material things,

is selling his house, buying them a house, a bunch of stuff.

 

I don't believe in this marriage as a bond of solid love. But whatever,

if it makes my Dad happy, right? i get it.

 

BUT. . .I'm to be involved in the wedding at his asking. Honestly, I

don't want to...only because I don't believe in this pairing. I hardly

know the lady and my Dad hasn't been good at trying to explain

all this to me. In fact, he told me weeks later after he had already

asked her. He's completely ignored me and his grandchild because

he's been consumed with this new life he's wacko over. I've told him

things about his Grandchild and he's totally forgotten them because

he's only thinking about the wedding

 

Honestly, i'm sure the gal is just marrying him because he has money

and because it seems like a good situation for her and her two sons.

My Dad has a habit of buying love, buying gifts for people to be

accepted. He overlooks the big picture and overlooks potential

problems. I don't trust his judgement.

 

i'm totally frustrated because i'm trying to be nice to him and accepting,

but i'm about ready to tell him this is a HUGE mistake and I don't want

any part of it and just cut him off...

Edited by StreetDog
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Well your dad is a grown man and been around longer than you. The things you say you noticed and are concerned about are not new wave concepts your father is likely to have never heard of. You believe the woman to be materialistic? You father might believe so too and want to marry her anyway. And really, its his lesson to learn at whatever age he ends up learning it.

 

But he is your dad and there are ways to discuss your concerns in a respectful manner. Try it out. You might find he sees what you see and accepts what you wouldn't in a partner.

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Thanks Sara...

 

I'm just frustrated because in a lot of ways in my relationship with

my father, i've felt like The Parent and he The Kid.

 

I love my Dad because he's my Dad...but I have nothing in common

with him and i've never had that father/son "bond" with him. The only

thing we have in common is blood.

Edited by StreetDog
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