alwaysconfusedd Posted December 24, 2010 Posted December 24, 2010 Hey Guys, I will try and be brief !!! Ive known a guy for 5 years now, there has always been alot of attraction between us. Whenever we are together we always become intimate ( but no sex). Basically, he told me from the start he didnt want a relationship, I fell In love ( possibly still am).....his lacck of commitment made me feel angry at times and I reacted BADLY !! I said mean things behind his back, he found out, I apologised he forgave me. Then we are intimate again ( hugs, kisses, touching deep breathing etc..in other words foreplay) I get more emotionally attached, he backs away....I get angry...this time I took it too far..I contacted his ex and I fought with him and said some VERY nasty things...he refused to speak to me for a month. Now we are talking again, he has forgiven me...but claims he is only open to friendship ....but I have a few questions that I need help with : 1 ) Can you be friends with someone you have strong feelings for ? 2) Is this an unhealthy relationship dynamic that needs to stop ? 3) Why does he always forgive me ? Is it because on some level he has feelings for me? Could it be guilt ? Or does he just seem to be a nice guy ? If you were in my position, would you do ?
january2010 Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 1) Nope 2) Yes 3) The intimacy sessions You want more, he's told you twice that he doesn't want a relationship. After five years, I'd definitely call it a day.
Author alwaysconfusedd Posted December 25, 2010 Author Posted December 25, 2010 thank u january2010 for your comment. What I find a bit confusing is : I currently live in a different country..so there is now way we can have intimacy sessions......and im not into any cyber stuff either.......so I find it interesting that he is still open to communication and friendship
Arabella Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 You're fishing for someone to tell you that he has feelings for you but the fact is that he doesn't. Otherwise, he'd be in a relationship with you. He is open to contact and "friendship" because he figures it may be good to keep you around in case he wants more intimacy from you in the future. Have some self-respect and end all contact with him so you can move on.
january2010 Posted December 25, 2010 Posted December 25, 2010 He is open to contact and "friendship" because he figures it may be good to keep you around in case he wants more intimacy from you in the future. Yup, this is probably the reason why he's still in contact with you.
Author alwaysconfusedd Posted December 25, 2010 Author Posted December 25, 2010 Thank you for your input.
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