For those of looking for love.

[Disillusioned]

I don't need to look anyways. The fact still stands that my Realdoll has given me more love than any woman is capable of giving.

[Yer_Blues]

I don't need to look anyways. The fact still stands that my Realdoll has given me more love than any woman is capable of giving.

Objects are not capable of emotion. They cannot love or hate you O_o

[january2010]

I read about how there are two ways to wash dishes. You can wash dishes to have clean dishes, or you can wash dishes to wash dishes.

 

A thought-provoking post, Yer_Blues. However, if we just 'do' and 'be' without goals, doesn't that leave us drifting aimlessly to be blown about as the world sees fit? Not sure that's a good state to be in.

[Yer_Blues]

A thought-provoking post, Yer_Blues. However, if we just 'do' and 'be' without goals, doesn't that leave us drifting aimlessly to be blown about as the world sees fit? Not sure that's a good state to be in.

You don't have to be without goals. What you need is to not let your goals interfere with you living in the current moment. The current moment can be leading you towards the completion of a goal.

 

Think of an American NFL team. Most of the best players are all as dedicated as possible to winning a Superbowl. However, those who play football just to win a Superbowl will not be entirely in control of their happiness. There are so many other factors beyond control (the performance of other players, coaching, weather, reffing). They must struggle to always focus only on their INDIVIDUAL play, EACH PLAY. Every single second they are playing in that game, they need to be aware only of what is occurring on the field.

 

A player without this concentration is too easily shaken by the adversity of the game. A Quarterback simply playing to win the Superbowl or playing for personal acclaim is going to be overcome with frustration at the temporary thwarting of his desires when he throws an interception. A great QB needs to be able to go out the next time he has the ball with as much focus on the dynamics of the game as ever. He needs to simply be playing the game for the love of the game.

 

The best athletes love their sport.

 

Let me simply quote the author I read to clarify what he meant, as everything I post is simply how I am interpreting and using his ideas.

 

"If while washing dishes, we think only of the cup of tea that awaits us, thus hurrying to get the dishes out of the way as if they were a nuisance, then we are not "washing the dishes to wash the dishes." What's more, we are not alive during the time we are washing the dishes. In fact we are completely incapable of realizing the miracle of life while standing at the sink. If we can't wash the dishes, the chances are we won't be able to drink our tea either. While drinking the cup of tea, we will only be thinking of other things, barely aware of the cup in our hands. Thus we are sucked away into the future -and we are incapable of actually living one minute of life."

- Thich Nhat Hanh, The Miracle of Mindfulness

Edited December 28, 2010 by Yer_Blues

[january2010]

"If while washing dishes, we think only of the cup of tea that awaits us, thus hurrying to get the dishes out of the way as if they were a nuisance, then we are not "washing the dishes to wash the dishes." What's more, we are not alive during the time we are washing the dishes. In fact we are completely incapable of realizing the miracle of life while standing at the sink. If we can't wash the dishes, the chances are we won't be able to drink our tea either. While drinking the cup of tea, we will only be thinking of other things, barely aware of the cup in our hands. Thus we are sucked away into the future -and we are incapable of actually living one minute of life."

 

Why are we "washing the dishes to wash the dishes?"

 

And what do you think the author means by "we are not alive during the time we are washing the dishes?" We are standing there; our physiological processes are working and we are using them to wash the dishes.

 

Surely we cannot always "realize the miracle of life" in everything that we do? There must be mundane activities that just "are" and require no more analysis than that - it's okay to not see them as miracles of life.

 

I feel that if we are not moving towards a future, we are standing still and stagnating. That also counts as not living life, in my opinion.

[Yer_Blues]

Why are we "washing the dishes to wash the dishes?"

 

And what do you think the author means by "we are not alive during the time we are washing the dishes?" We are standing there; our physiological processes are working and we are using them to wash the dishes.

 

Surely we cannot always "realize the miracle of life" in everything that we do? There must be mundane activities that just "are" and require no more analysis than that - it's okay to not see them as miracles of life.

 

I feel that if we are not moving towards a future, we are standing still and stagnating. That also counts as not living life, in my opinion.

Why are you doing anything? You are nothing, you are born, you are alive, you die. Using goals and desires as a way to avoid the "mundane" nature of the present moment is simply distracting yourself from the fact that you aren't happy being yourself. The happiest of people don't need to be doing something incredibly stimulating to feel alive. They don't need to distract the mind from the reality of the senses and the present moment.

 

I worried about including the miracle of life line, because there is not nearly enough context for you to understand what he is referencing. The dude's Buddhist, they seem to see everything as being connected in one aggregate.

 

"He began to talk about what we would be doing in the future. Whenever we thought about a project that seemed attractive or inspiring, Jim became so immersed in it that the literally forgot about what he was doing in the present. He popped a section of tangerine in his mouth and, before he had begun chewing it, had another slice ready to pop into his mouth again. He was hardly aware he was eating a tangerine. All I had to say was, "You ought to eat the tangerine section you've already taken." Jim was startled into realizing what he was doing. It was as if he hadn't been eating the tangerine at all. If he had been eating anything, he was "eating" his future plans.

 

A tangerine has sections. If you can eat just one section, you can probably eat the entire tangerine. But if you can't eat a single section, you cannot eat the tangerine. Jim understood. He slowly put his hand down and focused on the presence of the slice already in his mouth. He chewed it thoughtfully before reaching down and taking another section. Later, when Jim went to prison for activities against the war, I was worried about whether he could endure the four walls of prison and sent him a very short letter: "Do you remember the tangerine we shared when we were together? Your being there is like the tangerine. Eat it and be one with it. Tomorrow it will be no more."

Edited December 28, 2010 by Yer_Blues

[january2010]

We are not nothing. By being alive we are something. By doing something, our lives have purpose. With goals and desires, we have something to strive for. It gives our lives meaning.

 

Accepting that sometimes things are mundane and that we need our goals and desires to distract us is part of who we are. If we cannot accept this, then we cannot find happiness because we are subconsciously fighting the future that's relentlessly knocking at our door.

 

We are not one single point in time and space; we are a path, a journey with a beginning, a middle and an end. What is the point of the present moment if it is not to get us from the previous moment to the next? Time marches on.

 

If we are not being stimulated, how can we perceive the reality of our senses? If we are not being stimulated, how can we feel alive?

 

Regarding the miracle of life line, why not include the context to aid understanding?

 

I do like the tangerine exerpt and by the way, I enjoy washing dishes.

 

It's a shame that I'm not able to PM, this is very thought-provoking for me, and I feel that we may be hijacking this thread.

Edited December 28, 2010 by january2010

[Yer_Blues]

We are not nothing. By being alive we are something. By doing something, our lives have purpose. With goals and desires, we have something to strive for. It gives our lives meaning.

 

Accepting that sometimes things are mundane and that we need our goals and desires to distract us is part of who we are. If we cannot accept this, then we cannot find happiness because we are subconsciously fighting the future that's relentlessly knocking at our door.

 

We are not one single point in time and space; we are a path, a journey with a beginning, a middle and an end. What is the point of the present moment if it is not to get us from the previous moment to the next? Time marches on.

 

If we are not being stimulated, how can we perceive the reality of our senses? If we are not being stimulated, how can we feel alive?

 

Regarding the miracle of life line, why not include the context to aid understanding?

 

I do like the tangerine exerpt and by the way, I enjoy washing dishes.

 

It's a shame that I'm not able to PM, this is very thought-provoking for me, and I feel that we may be hijacking this thread.

I did not mean we are nothing now, we are nothing BEFORE we are born. That sentence was kind of like a timeline, but I see how you could interpret it differently.

 

I disagree that by doing something or achieving goals, we have purpose. It is simply the illusion of purpose. Our existence could be looked at as simply memories. Our brain stores all our experiences and our judgement of them, but in the end, when our brain dies, all of it is flushed away like wiping clean a slate or destroying a newly finished piece of art. No matter what we may think we have "accomplished", or no matter how we spend our time here, it does not give it meaning. Everything significant to us, all of our conclusions, everything we learn will disappear. All we have is the present moment. There IS nothing else. There is only reality.

 

We do not need to distract ourselves from reality to feel alive. Our senses are always being stimulated, we just begin to forget because we are caught up in the confusion of our mind trying to establish meaning or figure things out or accomplishing something. The idea of this whole concept is to begin to pay attention to what life ACTUALLY IS and to become happy with that. To make conditions where you will be happy if you were not living life but some different set of circumstances is life-denying and nihilistic.

 

I can hardly even begin to start achieving mindfulness, because if you really engage it and try it, you will find it to be almost impossible at first. To engage in activities without your mind distracting you from actually experiencing them is more difficult than it sounds. You need to always be aware of what you are doing, what you are perceiving, what you are thinking, and what you are feeling.

[TaraMaiden]

Why are we "washing the dishes to wash the dishes?"

Actually, it would be easier to answer that, if we turn the question around. Why aren't we?

 

And what do you think the author means by "we are not alive during the time we are washing the dishes?" We are standing there; our physiological processes are working and we are using them to wash the dishes.

The problem with standing there and washing dishes, is that in actual fact, - - we are not standing there washing dishes.

Permit me if I may, to elaborate.

While we stand and wash dishes (and in fact, probably during any mundane, non-skilled task, like vacuuming, or simply walking to the shops) our mind is racing, and doing, thinking and planning any greater, different separate number of things... we're busy thinking about work, someone else, a discussion, a comment, a date, an event, an incident.... in fact, we're doing everything BUT washing dishes, vacuuming or simply walking to the shops.

Our mind is rarely, if ever, completely focussed on the task in hand.

Have you ever driven to a destination and realised you don't completely remember getting there?

That's because your mind was literally, elsewhere. The phrase "I'm sorry, I was miles away!" is one I hear very often....

 

The exercise in question is one designed to get you to focus completely on the Present.

It's one designed to prevent your mind wandering, chattering incessantly, meandering here and there, in an altogether uncontrolled manner.

And if you think you have your mind, under control, then follow the exercise intended:

Wash dishes, to wash dishes.

Do the washing up without any additional commentary, or distraction.

Run the water, add the soap, immerse the dishes.... all without thinking "I am running the water, I am adding the soap, I am immersing the dishes...."

Do everything focussing entirely on the job you are doing, without any extraneous thinking...

 

This is what Thich Nhat Hahn means by 'being alive' while you are washing the dishes.

There is no better place, than here. There is no better time than now.

When you do this exercise, you are entirely self-focussed.

How can any sadness, frustration, irritation, resentment, anger or heartbreak invade a space that is so controlled? Controlled, by you, moreover?

While you are Mindful and in the moment, you have everything you need, right there.

 

Surely we cannot always "realize the miracle of life" in everything that we do? There must be mundane activities that just "are" and require no more analysis than that - it's okay to not see them as miracles of life.

Why not?

The very fact that you are breathing, and alive, is a miracle.

You are an absolutely perfect specimen of a miracle in motion.

Sure, you don't have to remind yourself every living instant, but you should develop awareness....Mundane is not mundane, when you consider the different mechanisms in place all working together to carry out the mundane.

The nerve impulses, the tendons, ligaments, muscles and joints, all moving together, the eyes making sure everything is as it should be....

Did you know that walking is simply the repeated process of falling over?

You push yourself out of the centre of balance, and you automatically save yourself from impacting the sidewalk and breaking your nose, by mechanically bringing the other leg to the front.

How long did that take? Milliseconds. Don't you think that's remarkable?

And the body can adjust its own resistance to pain, and increase the pain threshold,as a damage limitation exercise.

You'll smartly pull your hand off a radiator, when you didn't realise it was on, but if you pick up a full cup of coffee by the rim, and realise it's hotter, your body will increase your pain resistance until you can quickly find a surface on which to safely put it.

Isn't that extraordinary??

 

Be Mindful of how incredible you are, and strive to concentrate on the moment in hand.

It's an extraordinarily beneficial healing method.

 

 

 

I feel that if we are not moving towards a future, we are standing still and stagnating. That also counts as not living life, in my opinion.

 

There is Chronological time, and psychological time.

Chronological time is that which enables trains, buses and planes to run to schedule. it tells you when birthdays are, anniversaries and medical appointments. it tells you when Spring begins and Summer ends...

It is a necessary element of existing in a world which is tied to time.

Psychological time is Now, and at no other time. the previous second is irretrievable, and spent. the future moment does not exist, because the instant you reach it - it's Now.

 

Standing still is not the objective.

Understanding that the present instant is the only one in which we can effectively function - is.

You have no other moment in which to be powerful.

Might as well use it to its fullest advantage.....

Edited December 28, 2010 by TaraMaiden

[Yer_Blues]

I think this quote really touches upon what is being discussed:

 

"If you cannot find joy in peace in these very

moments of sitting, then the future itself will

only flow by as a river flows by, you will not be

able to hold it back, you will be incapable of

living the future when it has become the present."

 

Also, he does not seem to look at the ultimate goal as CONTROLLING the mind. It's a synchronization of the body, the mind, and the minds conception of the mind. One is not chasing the other when one is mindful and at peace.

[LifeIsGreat]

Wow, great info here!! I think anyone who truly wants to grasp these concepts will have to do some reading of their own. Not sure a message board will get you there, but it's a good start.

 

Looking for love? I think it's OK to look, but not need. I prefer to have a great love, but I don't need it since I'm OK with myself.

 

I can't really 'manifest' a new car without at some point going to a dealer and buying it. It won't magically show up in my garage. At some point action is required to do anything in life. But life also has a way of providing clues as to what we should be doing, and where we should be going.

[Yer_Blues]

Wow, great info here!! I think anyone who truly wants to grasp these concepts will have to do some reading of their own. Not sure a message board will get you there, but it's a good start.

 

Looking for love? I think it's OK to look, but not need. I prefer to have a great love, but I don't need it since I'm OK with myself.

 

I can't really 'manifest' a new car without at some point going to a dealer and buying it. It won't magically show up in my garage. At some point action is required to do anything in life. But life also has a way of providing clues as to what we should be doing, and where we should be going.

Yeah I never expected a thread in this section of the board to send me into a reading quest/reevaluation of my methods.

 

I think you really make a good point about some action being required. You definitely will not magically get into a relationship no matter how happy/positive/confident/satisfied you are unless you do the things you need to do to get into a relationship. Inaction and desperation are two extremes, and the logical, level headed option lies between. I don't believe in magic, and I probably don't agree with many of the beliefs held by the people who present these ideas about mindfulness. However, the methods are clearly effective if you look into them. They have all sorts of beneficial rewards for those who dedicate themselves. If you think about how automatic behavior forms, it makes sense that over time we would begin to check out of our reality and not engage fully in the moment. When things like negative emotions or thought patterns become automatic, it is REALLY entrapping. This method is almost like trying to take the automatic back out. By engaging so heavily in the little things, forcing constant attention to things the brain seems to discount/find mundane, perhaps it is possible to root out automatic negative thoughts as well. I don't see why there should have to be a disconnect between mindfulness and the findings of psychology, if investigated properly.

 

What this thread really addresses, I think, is a method for self improvement. Being comfortable with yourself, or confident, or however you want to phrase it, is an important component of attraction. However, to discount the physical component and the compatibility components would be silly/oversimplifying.

 

You could be the happiest, most self aware person in the world and still have a really difficult time finding partners if you are lacking in other areas, like style or physical attractiveness. People need self improvement in ALL areas.

 

Still though, this thread has been extremely helpful to me. I personally would like to thank shyan for the ideas he presented and Tara for spending so much time helping introduce me to such a complicated but rewarding stockpile of new concepts and ideas.

Edited December 28, 2010 by Yer_Blues

[shayan]

OMG,

 

Yer Blue your growth is amazing I'm very proud of you, Tara Maiden has had a big impact on you.

 

This is what inspired me to write the original post,

 

A year ago november I broke up with my first real love when I had first turned 21. There was love and infatuation, and obsession. I mean jesus all I thought about was that girl she had become so important to me that she was more important than me. Having been on LS for a while now this kind of story seems very common on both sides of the coin for both men and women. Before this relationship I was a shy and timid boy and all the girls I had met approached me. In fact, this girl came up sat next to me for two weeks and I ignored her and talked to the other girl. Then finally I started talking to her it turned out we went to highschool and middle school together and live maybe a mile away from eachother then I fell in love how clische right? I always thought I was above her better than her I would de tag her in photos cause I didn't think she was attractive enough to be associated on facebook with me. Well did things change a few years later started dating and she blew me away, and then she dumped my ass cold into the ground. Cold, a few days before my birthday.

 

Because I was shy and timid after the break up as well, I found it hard to find new dates. Once again the next girl I dated found me and started talking to me. Though I ended this relationship about 4 months ago. Once, again I was left single shy and timid and unable to find love. Then I talked to my sister about this who I have never seen not in a relationship for more than like 2 weeks in her life and she about to get married finally thank god And she told me stop being a frigging pussy and go talk to girls.

 

and guess what for the next couple of months that's exactly what I did. I talked to girls in class, on busses, on trains, at restauraunts, at weddings, at bar mitzvahs, anywhere, I pushed my self way out of my comfort zone. I realized that the more I spoke the better I got. In fact, I'm so glad I did this because now when the right girls roll around I'm not a gun shy deer in the headlights, and I've been on numerous dates since but still have not found the right one. So if you guys think this is about sitting on your asses waiting for a girl to come to your apartment and ask you out then, no that was not my message.

 

(everything I say here goes for girls as well)

 

You have to leave your house, you have to get out of your comfort zone, experience new things, grow. But you can't do these things with the sole intention of finding love because it just doesn't work like that. When you're talking to a girl right if you're thinking about 'will she be the next one, does she like me, omg I hope we fall in love, etc, etc." You're not thinking about the girl, in fact your not even paying attention to the present moment you're just focusing on what you want. But believe this is the most unattractive way to be in the world. Because you give of a desperate and unfulfilled vibe. A girl doesn't want someone who needs an emotional blanket, she wants someone who is genuinely interested in her same for guys. We don't want a chick to use us as an emotional tampon or cructh, we want them to be genuinely interested.

 

So now you're are going to ask well then what the hell do I do?

 

Do I go after the girls (or men), or do I let them come to me.

 

Neither you meet them half way,

 

you do your thing, build yourself, your confidence, your self love, your self image, your life. Learn to be happy just the way you are even though you are not with someone at the moment. Then go out into the world with no expectations just go out to meet people and spread ideas and love or whatever it is you want to convey, and be open to the idea of finding someone you'll like. That's it when you go in with no expectations just being yourself you can't lose. You don't have to lie or exxagerate, you don't have to deal with the ever stinging pain of rejection (although there will still be rejection for most I promise, not everyone is going to like you get use to that idea). Just be yourself and I promise the people who are in alignment with you the ones you do click with will be around and will notice your light.

 

Cause I'm telling you when you don't give a damn and just want to live out your purpose, a light turns on within you. Why do you think people are so attractive to those meaner guys. It's not because they are mean (most women btw learn that these guys should be avoided by there mid twenties from what I hear and I don't suggest people take the ******* approach it's a bad way in my opinion); it is because they don't care to impress the girl or pamper her they treat her like anyone else and that is damn attractive.

You don't have to be an asshoe to embody this qaulity just confident and knowing of your own value, you realize we are all eqaul therefore there is no reason I should ever think any guy or girl is better than me.

 

But you can't turn on this light to attract girls (or guys) because this is an artificial flourescent light which expires in a couple months and you'll ending looking like the guys on jersey shore, you have to do it for yourself and it will last like the sun.

 

So my friends I tell you if you want love stop trying so hard, build yourself let it come and then go and meet it. You can't do it sitting in your apartment unless you're on a dating website (in which case good for you), and you can't do it with desperation and expectation

 

balance, balance, simple, simple, simple these are the lessons I have learned.

 

That is all.

 

as a side note

 

I was depressed for nearly 6 months after my first girl dumped me, I don't think I can ever shed a tear for another girl again cause I know the value of my life and that little details fade.

 

See the bigger picture.

 

Good luck and lighten up, don't try so hard, you may be suprised.

[TaraMaiden]

I think this quote really touches upon what is being discussed:

 

"If you cannot find joy in peace in these very

moments of sitting, then the future itself will

only flow by as a river flows by, you will not be

able to hold it back, you will be incapable of

living the future when it has become the present."

 

Also, he does not seem to look at the ultimate goal as CONTROLLING the mind. It's a synchronization of the body, the mind, and the minds conception of the mind. One is not chasing the other when one is mindful and at peace.

The Mind, in Buddhism (If I may stray that way) is occasionally likened to a Monkey.

if you go to a zoo, the monkeys are never still. They're always doing something, either together, or on their own. They're never sitting. Just running around, jumping, acrobatics, swinging, leaping....chasing....

 

the only time monkeys are still, is when they're either sleeping, or eating.

 

Our minds do the same. They're always doing something, either interacting with someone else, or on their own. They're never serene. Just running around, jumping, acrobatics, swinging, leaping....chasing....

Our minds run away with us. Or from us.

 

We can't sleep all day.

So, instead of sleeping, we can 'feed' the monkey.

It still remains alert, watchful, ready to move, but it is calm and quiet, and focussed on its 'food'.

 

It's food, is whatever you choose to focus on, single-pointedly.

it could be the rhythmic sensation of your breath, or you could merely recite a word, over and over.

(It's called a 'Mantra' but please, it doesn't have to be religiously-connected!)

You could simply recite 'focus', or 'stillness'.... And the moment your monkey mind begins to leap around, bringing other factors in and trying to resume its frenetic activity, just breathe deeply, and say your Mantra. Bring it back to a still, aleet state.

 

One cannot continuously be "In Control" of the Mind. This would be a constant effort and objective, and cannot be done. Your Mind is a functioning tool, made for the purpose of cogitation.

But we can address its wildness, and channel the process to an extent that we can direct our thought processes and make our Minds more constructively engaged.

 

"If you cannot find joy in peace in these very

moments of sitting, then the future itself will

only flow by as a river flows by, you will not be

able to hold it back, you will be incapable of

living the future when it has become the present."

 

Makes sense, doesn't it?

[shayan]

I'm not editing any of my posts so I apoligize in advance I just want my thoughts to flow without interruption.

 

And I don't mean to buddhism or any of the theorys down because of what I just said. I just mean to say there is a very practical scientific component of me which I will never let go because I love it so I don't completely just go with buddhist beliefs.

 

I like to think I'm a realistic optimist or real optimist.

 

Good luck guys.

 

In fact this was a perfect example of what I'm talking about. When I wrote this post I knew it would skyrocket I just knew, no doubts I just knew. If I had never wrote this post well then... But once I wrote the post I let go I didn't go and find people to force them to respond. People like disillusioned came to critic, and Tara maiden to support, Yer blues to learn and change his life, in fact we all learned didn't we.

 

I wrote the post and allowed for you guys to meet it, I sent out my thoughts and they met yours and boy have they created an interesting post.

Edited December 29, 2010 by shayan

[TaraMaiden]

OMG,

 

Yer Blue your growth is amazing I'm very proud of you, Tara Maiden has had a big impact on you.

 

No, no, no.

The credit is not mine.

I'm merely repeating what I have found to be absolutely true for me.

If it has resonated with anyone, it's because that person was ready and open to those concepts.

Everyone on this board is free to read what I have put.

Not everybody will either accept or ingest what I have put.

To many, it will not seem the truth, or appropriate, but the words are the same, read by everyone....

Some will look upon my posts with interest, others with cynicism and even disdain.

That's fine.

It's their choice, and it's where they're at.

 

......

I was depressed for nearly 6 months after my first girl dumped me, I don't think I can ever shed a tear for another girl again cause I know the value of my life and that little details fade.

 

See the bigger picture.

 

Good luck and lighten up, don't try so hard, you may be suprised.

Releasing is a big part of doing this.

Letting Go.

 

Little word.

Huge Action...

 

Buddhism and science are easy bedfellows, by the way. HH the Dalai lama is an accomplished scientist. And a very good book, The Quantum and the Lotus, is written by a Buddhist Monk - and a Buddhist Scientist. The two worlds meet and are conjoined....

 

But admittedly - I am no scientist!

 

Hugs, Shayan.

[TaraMaiden]

You could say our individual thoughts are where Science - your input - and Buddhism - mine - Meet!!

[shayan]

I send you my love Tara maiden thanks for helping to make this post awesome.

[TaraMaiden]

Well, you started it, I just added stuff.....

 

I hope the link is of interest.

 

[january2010]

Yer_Blues, TaraMaiden, you've given me a lot to think about.

[TaraMaiden]

Damn.

And here's me trying to give you a lot to NOT think about - !!

 

:laugh:

[january2010]

Ach, well

[Disillusioned]

Objects are not capable of emotion. They cannot love or hate you O_o

 

Of course they can! My Realdoll loves me (or at least she's incapable of rejecting me or pushing me away when I really need a hug), but there's a pair of pliers in my garage that does hate me... I know it does because it always tries to escape or hurt me when I use it.

[cord_jessica]

It like lottery. You need to join as many sites as possible. You need increase your chances of meeting that special someone.

 

You can try signing up all the free dating websites on this website. http://clickhere-perfectmatch.com

[shayan]

not so much a lottery more like a patient knowing.