Am So 5crewed Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 Keeping in mind my gf has not been very truthful in the past and has kissed other guys, (I know, I know) and that I have caught her in lies, etc. She has said she loves me, but was drunk, it was a mistake, and lots of other excuses.....(anyway, that's another story). She has said she is going to stop drinking and behave, etc. She has begged for a last chance. Personally I feel that she has used it up already, but anyway. So, does a last chance just mean "lets just wait 'till I screw up again" or do you think that leopards can change their spots? Or do they just get spottier? Frankly I have had enough and am ready to walk out, but I did say she could have one more chance. Though I have lost the love, dont trust her and basically feel like an idiot. I feel as though I am just waiting for her to ask again for one last chance, which obviously isn't going to happen. But can people change like that? Or are the personality flaws there to stay? Link to post Share on other sites
Space Ritual Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 Though I have lost the love, dont trust her and basically feel like an idiot. Right there is your answer...it will not get any better Link to post Share on other sites
Author Am So 5crewed Posted January 4, 2011 Author Share Posted January 4, 2011 (edited) Isn't that the truth. One of the problems I have is that I actually caught her. I had to do a bit of snooping I admit, but I wouldn't of if I wasn't really suspicious. I just think that now she is going to be extra secretive and of course it will be harder to know if she has used the last chance or not. But can people change? Will she learn from her mistakes or is the thrill of cheating too much? I guess she has low self esteem and craves the attention. I am a reasonably good b/f and remember when we first got together I was thinking that one of the reasons she liked me is because I made her feel good about herself, I was attentive and also trustworthy. But, I am now wondering if she is used to my compliments and affection and needs to find another source. Of course there is a certain amount or paranoia floating around in my mind and I must admit my self esteem has taken a bit of a battering. I honestly dont know if people can change or if the personality traits are there to stay. I remember reading somewhere "Women hope men will change after marriage but they don't; men hope women won't change but they do". Is this true or just another saying? Edited January 4, 2011 by Am So 5crewed missquote Link to post Share on other sites
shayan Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 ha if you want to give her a chance then do it, give her a chance and try to feel it with her again. But from the tone of your message I think it's time to move on brotha! Cheating is the one thing I don't tolerate and it sounds like you can do better. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 dont trust her and basically feel like an idiot That is exactly how she sees you as well. She thinks she can get away with whatever she likes. If you feel she has used up all her "chances" (she's lucky to get a second, let alone third or fourth or however many you've given her!) then get rid of her right now. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted January 4, 2011 Share Posted January 4, 2011 Exactly how many chances have you given her? If it's multiple times, she's no serious about you. You are her safety net. Someone that's gonna be there for her and be a constant in her life. You deserve better. Link to post Share on other sites
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