My fiancee's recurrent nightmares that I will leave her...

[jmargel]

She's told me before that she has nightmares sometimes that I break up with her. She told me she had one the other day that I left her and took the ring back. Her friends were trying to help her but she said she was in complete depression.

 

I'm always there for her and been by her side. Everyone that knows her has told me that I'm the best thing that's happened to her. And not to brag but I do treat her very well. I learned alot from my past. I mean I had a dream once where she left me, but it hasn't happened but only once.

 

Perhaps she's insecure. I mean there was an issue though earlier in the week where I told her our relationship was going to be affected soon if things didn't change. She used to call her ex, like once a month to see how he was doing, but she told me everytime she did call. She also told me that she's told him that she is happy, etc.. The last time she called was to let him know she got engaged to me and she said they both wished each other well. Well a few weeks later we run into him & his friends at a club. They started mouthin' off to me and made her seem like a tramp. Things were going to get ugly fast. He never came up to us, it was his friends. She then told me, she wasn't calling him anymore. Well, he called her Monday to say 'sorry' and that it wasn't his doing (I told her he was going to do this). He then asked her if 'I was the one she wanted to marry' She told him she never thought about marriage until getting with me, and that there was no chance of them ever seeing each other in person again. But I then asked her how long they talked and she told me 30 mins. I then got very upset. Telling her I can't see how you talked to him for that long telling him the things you said. She then played it off saying 'Oh he just talked about himself as usual', and I then told her why do you even let him do this? He also told her that he didnt want her telling ME that those two talked. I mentioned to her that he is trying to undermine our relationship with him saying the things he is. She said I have nothing to worry about etc.. I then said 'What if the shoe was on the other foot?' She said 'Well, it wouldn't bother me because I trust you. And that if you had a problem talking to your ex then that would be a sign of you possbility having feelings for her'. I then told her that's not the case and its about respect. I then told her that if she continues to let him talk to her like that and try to stick his nose into our relationship, that it is going to have a negative affect on us and the relationship.

 

I am trusting her when she's tells me she's told him these things and that she is truly happy with me. Numerous people have come upto me and said that she talks so highly of me and she's so in love with me.

 

So I think possibly her dreams are because of this. A couple of other times she's mentioned 'You don't trust me', which I do. But I just want to live in peace and not be bothered by him anymore. My ex has contacted me and my contact with her has been very limited. But I don't think my fiance thinks of my ex as a threat since she's married.

 

Any insight to this?

[moimeme]

People dream to process their thoughts. She likely fears losing you, and so dreams about it. This problem with the ex was serious enough for you to consider ending it with her. So talking to him again may have caused her to fear losing you and so dream about it.