exoduse22 Posted January 9, 2011 Share Posted January 9, 2011 (edited) I am 16 and I had this event yesterday and wasted another chance for friendships because of my body language. I usually keep looking around because it is so awkward to get eye contact with the person on the other side of the round table. It really gave me off that I was really feeling nervous and uneasy. I decided to stare on the thing on the center, but if I started at it for a long period of time it'll also give me off. It was during lunch by the way. Another part after lunch is when we were doing some activities and when the facilitators went somewhere for a period of time, some of the people would start talking to their close by friends, but the bad thing is that my friends are on the other groups which make me not have anyone really to talk to so I usually just either try to blend in the environment which my body language sometimes do not allow me to do. This really affected my performance that time and I realized some things I said did not make sense anymore which gave me off again that I was not feeling relaxed about the whole thing. I also do not know how to keep the conversation going without asking too much questions. I know overloading someone with questions is not the best thing to do D:. What should I do to speak better English and make more sense on what I am saying? The whole thing was like a chain reaction one thing after another. It has been my problem all my life and I really want to change it. Please help and thanks!! Edited January 9, 2011 by exoduse22 Link to post Share on other sites
JohnM Posted January 10, 2011 Share Posted January 10, 2011 Just take it easy. You are worried about your body language too much. Its a natural thing, if you don't think about it you'll probably look more open and start mirroring the position of the person you talk with. In terms of speaking, just give yourself an extra second or two to think about the sentence or train of thought you wish to convey. Its better to formulate your sentence and point with a pause than to convey it incorrectly by rushing your speaking. Link to post Share on other sites
Author exoduse22 Posted January 10, 2011 Author Share Posted January 10, 2011 Just take it easy. You are worried about your body language too much. Its a natural thing, if you don't think about it you'll probably look more open and start mirroring the position of the person you talk with. In terms of speaking, just give yourself an extra second or two to think about the sentence or train of thought you wish to convey. Its better to formulate your sentence and point with a pause than to convey it incorrectly by rushing your speaking. Yeah. My problem is that sometimes I really can't think of anything and there are times where they lose interest/patience to wait. It takes less than 5 seconds for a person to realize you can't answer. Link to post Share on other sites
JohnM Posted January 10, 2011 Share Posted January 10, 2011 Don't worry about silence, it takes two people to converse. If there is a point where you don't have anything to say then see if they pick up the thread. Both people need to participate in ther conversation. If they can't wait for 5 seconds for a response then they are not worth talking to. Link to post Share on other sites
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