nightonthesun Posted January 13, 2011 Share Posted January 13, 2011 Hi all, I'm new to these forums and will try to make this as short as possible. I have been with my boyfriend for about four months now. He is a very nice guy and makes me very happy. He is still friends with a girl who he met his freshman year of college. They spent a lot of time together and he wanted to be more than friends, even though she had a boyfriend. He waited about a year until her and her bf broke up, and told her he liked her. According to him, she just "blew him off" when he tried to tell her how he felt. A few months later, she got back together with her boyfriend. A year after that, he began dating me, and she all of a sudden began to come around him more often when she found out he had a new girlfriend. When I first met her, she was extremely flirty with him and kept talking about all the fun times they used to have together, making me feel very uncomfortable. When I confronted my boyfriend about this he explained that it was just a crush, he was over it, and even if she wanted to date him, he didn't want to mess up what he has with me. I can't help but feel like he liked her more than he's putting on. Regardless, I am nervous because my boyfriend is going out to the bars with his friends (her included) to celebrate his 21st birthday. I cannot go, as I'm just 19. I'm afraid they'll all get very drunk and she will try to make a move on him, especially because I won't be around. I want to discuss my concerns to my bf but I'm not sure how to go about it. Am I just being insecure? or should I be concerned? Link to post Share on other sites
Goodstuff Posted January 13, 2011 Share Posted January 13, 2011 A Woman's true emotions come up when she gets jealous. His friend is all of a sudden interested because he is with you. He may still like her on some level. Now it comes down to how much u trust him and what character he has. If hes a man of character he will brush off her advances and u have nothing to worry about. If he does screw up then go find someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
Billy_Boy Posted January 13, 2011 Share Posted January 13, 2011 There wasnt enough in your post to make me think he was untrustworthy, but then I dont know you or him at all, are there any bits of evidence you have figured out that make you suspicious? I have female friends I see here and there including my ex gf, and my current gf doesnt try to stop me from seeing them because she trusts me and knows I wouldnt do anything that would hurt us. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nightonthesun Posted January 13, 2011 Author Share Posted January 13, 2011 No, he really hasn't done anything that I can point to and say that he's interested in her. Part of me thinks she put him in the friend zone early on, because she's had three years to be with him and they never became anything more than friends. And he is the guy she goes to so she can complain about her current boyfriend. I guess I just assumed that he loved her and he'd jump at the chance to be with her, because his crush went on for so long, but again, I have no evidence to prove this, other than the fact that they do have online conversations from time to time. When I first was feeling uneasy about their friendship, I asked him and he explained what I explained in the post. I feel like asking him again might show that I don't trust him, should I ask about it anyway or would that start a huge and unecessary fight? Link to post Share on other sites
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