Denillad Posted January 15, 2011 Share Posted January 15, 2011 My ex and i were together for 4 1/2 year and we broke up after a nasty fight in dec of 2008. We remained in contact but never discussed the break up getting back together but we had sex a few times. I always thought we would get back together though i really didnt push it. About nine months later, he started to come around more n realized how much i still was in love with him but i said he was with someone else n he doesnt know what the future holds for us but not now. I became depressed and tried so hard to get through to him with no avail. He would come arpund to have sex n i allowed it cause it was my only connection with him. He would get jealous when started to see other people, he made me feel like i was wrong when at that was living with his gf. Ive struggled with this till now. I began dating n old friend from high school but i still thought about my ex every day. My new bf read some sexting communication between my ex n I. It tore him apart n now i need to make some changes in my life. He wants me to change my number, move to his state n never talk to my ex again. I think thats the best thing but i havent been able to get the thoughs of my ex out of my head and im afraid i'll never get over the loss of that relationship. I will meet with ex tomorrow to ask all the questions on my mind with hopes of getting some closure. I want to ask things like, does feel he made the best choice, would he have done anything differently, what does he feel now for me, is he in love, etc. Any thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
sirweasles Posted January 15, 2011 Share Posted January 15, 2011 I have alot of thoughts on that one however im going to keep most to myself. let me start with this guy is a dirtbag he has been using you and cheating on others with you. There is no excuse for how he is treating you I would walk away now no need talking to him any longer. believe me when i tell you if you were to get him back he would have a mistress on the side and eventually he would leave you again get out of this poisones relationship now. just my advice take it or leave it but the guy is goin to end up hurting you more than he already has. Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted January 15, 2011 Share Posted January 15, 2011 I think you only have one question your ex needs to answer...... which side of the fence does he want to be on? Right now hes riding it, and its tearing you apart. Let him choose, and you make him stick to it. If he wants you, then the girlfriend is out and he needs to make an honest try at putting the relationship back together. If hes out...... NO MORE PLAY DATES! Its hard to give up any connection and we all tend to cling to scraps as long as we can, but in the end, you have to really look and see if that is what is best for you, hes using that situation to his advantage right now and thats not fair to you or your boyfriend. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Denillad Posted January 16, 2011 Author Share Posted January 16, 2011 Thank you guys for the advice, I had the talk with him n he says he is happy were he is and he is fine with all his choices. He said it and I will move on from this. He said maybe we will meet again but I told no, this is goodbye forever. Thank you for your words. Link to post Share on other sites
You Go Girl Posted January 17, 2011 Share Posted January 17, 2011 now i need to make some changes in my life. He wants me to change my number, move to his state n never talk to my ex again. I think thats the best thing Yes, you are right, you do need to make some changes in your life. But I advise against moving to a new state to a new man, who could be, by the little I have read about him, a new type of controlling man. Must say it to you dear--ever think about being a strong person? Or are you going to let the men in your life dictate what happens in your life? You can be a puppet for many men to play with. There are so many that would like one just like you. Does what you're told, even moves to new states because is told to do so. Who owns you? You or the current man in your life? Who makes you decisions about what to do with your life? You, or the current man in your life? Do you have dreams or aspirations all about you, just about you, not about the current man in your life? Is your self-worth based solely on having a man in your life? Answer that one truthfully...you don't have to answer me, just answer to YOU. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Denillad Posted January 19, 2011 Author Share Posted January 19, 2011 @ you go girl - my bf has really tried to be supportive and yes he as been somewhat controlling but I do need to get over my ex. Link to post Share on other sites
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