noirprincesse Posted March 21, 2004 Posted March 21, 2004 My boyfriend and I have been dating for nine (9) months. He is twenty one (21) and I am twenty three (23). We spend lots of time together. He is always complimenting me about the way I look and the way I carry myself. He satisfies me in bed most of the time. We cuddle in bed alot. He is sweet. He is intelligent, funny etc. However, I am encountering problems with him. He has a job but he is always broke beacuse he has a bank loan, so he somewhat depends on me for minor things. At times he does not know when to be serious. He tell's me white lies, that he does not think I am aware of (eg. sleeping over at my place for a week, when he goes home i don't see him for a while, I ask him if he gets fussed out from his mom for sleeping over he says no but yet he rushes home early the next morning.) When I want to be romantic and try to kiss him 80% of the time out of 100 he turns his face away. He does want to perform oral sex on me. After the nine months of dating he still does not trust me, so he tells me. The things that I have mentioned above are bothering me. Guys I just have a feeling that something is not right in our relationship. I want to get married before the age of 28 and have kids. I want a relationship that is promising. What should I do keep hime or leave him, is he worth my time?
hurtingandconfused Posted March 22, 2004 Posted March 22, 2004 What should I do keep hime or leave him, is he worth my time? You are asking us if he's worth your time? Talk to him, where's the communication? If you feel that things between both of yous could be worked out...why not try? I want to get married before the age of 28 and have kids. Most of the time, plans don't go the way you originally plan them. Therefore you must adjust to them. (I have learned that the hard way) I believe that you cannot date when you want to be married...it kinda just happens for the right reasons.
capitald Posted March 22, 2004 Posted March 22, 2004 hurting and confused is right on the money! Where is the communication? I think that its very hard to find a person you click with so I would think very hard before saying goodbye. Remember he is 21, thats unfortunately still a baby in our society. You are so young as well. You NEED to give him some time to grow up! The whole marriage things sounds like you feel you need to lock him down to something so you don't lose him and that is NOT what marriage should be based on. He pleases you most of the time, thats fine, nobodies perfect, the more you expect perfection, the less happiness you will find. Also, 8 months is nothing, I think that its a good idea to date for 2-3 years before you get married, so you have plenty of time, slow down and breathe. I'll tell you, you have to confront him on the casual lying though, that alone will rip the relationship into pieces. Theres where you start because he has to respect you enough to tell you the truth. Otherwise you are doing fine.
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