robf1971 Posted May 25, 2011 Share Posted May 25, 2011 Your so right Rob, she is damaged goods, she will be divorced damaged goods very soon! I can't believe i re-homed my dog for her! I can't believe i sold my M3 for her! Seriously, give it a little while and get yourself an M5, a new one's coming out meaning the old one's gonna get cheap .... Once the divorce is finalised of course. Link to post Share on other sites
debtman Posted May 25, 2011 Share Posted May 25, 2011 Yep, this was after telling me that her and her new man are in it for the long haul and we need to make things amicable for the children, The sick thing is she really chased this guy! she forced his hans, she keeps telling me how much she loves him, all by voicemail. I don't respond to any of it Good job, don't respond, she doesn't deserve it. My stbx told me all the same stuff about OM and how "perfect" things were. That didn't last long. Now she's apologizing to me about our marriage, but she still hasn't apologized for the way she treated me for the first 4 months she was with him or for taking half my kids lives away or for the financial stress she's put me in...must not be that desperate yet...or that guilty. Don't give her a second thought. Focus on yourself, your kids, stay on track. You're doing great so far! Keep it up! Good luck and keep posting! Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted May 25, 2011 Author Share Posted May 25, 2011 Good job, don't respond, she doesn't deserve it. My stbx told me all the same stuff about OM and how "perfect" things were. That didn't last long. Now she's apologizing to me about our marriage, but she still hasn't apologized for the way she treated me for the first 4 months she was with him or for taking half my kids lives away or for the financial stress she's put me in...must not be that desperate yet...or that guilty. Don't give her a second thought. Focus on yourself, your kids, stay on track. You're doing great so far! Keep it up! Good luck and keep posting! Thanks Debtman, once again great advice. I'm still so angry with her, she just lied to my face for weeks or possibly months Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted May 25, 2011 Author Share Posted May 25, 2011 Also i forgot to mention that she sent me a message asking me to get the two grand back of the OM, which she has borrowed him. Don't think she will be seeing much of that 2k Link to post Share on other sites
Mauschen Posted May 25, 2011 Share Posted May 25, 2011 Hi Russell, I wasn't able to read your entire thread, but I hope you're documenting all of what she is doing. Keep her voicemails,texts, etc. Not sure where you live, but most courts don't like the kids being exposed to a boyfriend while the parents are still married. If you want custody of the kids, read Child Custody A to Z by Guy White. I would cut her off completely unless a she has a question about the kids.That is what I did with my ex, and it is much easier than trying to "be friends" with him. Plus, if you are willing to reconcile at some point, not giving her any support right now will help with that because she will then have to rely on OM for everything she needs. OM will probably disappoint her or he will loose interest once he has to live real life with her and 2 kids that are not his own. And when he breaks her heart, she will probably start to rethink what she's done to you and to her family. Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted May 25, 2011 Author Share Posted May 25, 2011 Hi Russell, I wasn't able to read your entire thread, but I hope you're documenting all of what she is doing. Keep her voicemails,texts, etc. Not sure where you live, but most courts don't like the kids being exposed to a boyfriend while the parents are still married. If you want custody of the kids, read Child Custody A to Z by Guy White. I would cut her off completely unless a she has a question about the kids.That is what I did with my ex, and it is much easier than trying to "be friends" with him. Plus, if you are willing to reconcile at some point, not giving her any support right now will help with that because she will then have to rely on OM for everything she needs. OM will probably disappoint her or he will loose interest once he has to live real life with her and 2 kids that are not his own. And when he breaks her heart, she will probably start to rethink what she's done to you and to her family. Thanks for your responce, It's going to end ugly, hopefully i have risen above it all Link to post Share on other sites
robf1971 Posted May 25, 2011 Share Posted May 25, 2011 Also i forgot to mention that she sent me a message asking me to get the two grand back of the OM, which she has borrowed him. Don't think she will be seeing much of that 2k You gotta love the entitlement of some people... Let her get it back off the man she is "in love" with.. Link to post Share on other sites
Mauschen Posted May 25, 2011 Share Posted May 25, 2011 (edited) No problem Russell, It will likely end ugly as did my marriage. I'm fighting for child support and custody modification now. I was too weak to do it in the past, but I have documented everything. With regards to custody, you MUST rely on your own documentation from babysitters, schools, mutual acquaintances, doctors, etc. Your solicitor/lawyer will not be able to do this for you. If your kids go to daycare, ask the daycare if your wife picks them up on time. Get a detective to watch her - maybe she goes out during her parenting time rather than spending time with the kids. Take your kids to a therapist so the therapist can hear them (at least the older one) talk about how her mom cares (or doesn't) care for her. All of this documentation will make or break your case for custody. You need 3rd parties to side with you. All the while, make sure you don't act out emotionally toward your wife and always do what is in the best interests of your girls. Teach them things, take them to fun places, take them to the doctor, buy their clothing, know what size clothes and shoes they wear, who their doctors are, and the names of their teachers. Talk to their doctors about possible neglect and talk with their teachers often about their progress. Not sure about where you live, but here in the states, it is seen as a big deal if a wife/husband spends money on and boyfriend/girlfriend during the marriage. Edited May 25, 2011 by Mauschen spelling Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted May 25, 2011 Author Share Posted May 25, 2011 You gotta love the entitlement of some people... Let her get it back off the man she is "in love" with.. Yep, i think he used smoke and mirrors as she is still in love with him, there is no way she will ever see that money again! Link to post Share on other sites
robf1971 Posted May 25, 2011 Share Posted May 25, 2011 Yep, i think he used smoke and mirrors as she is still in love with him, there is no way she will ever see that money again! Anyway, not your problem, let em both detonate together. Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted May 25, 2011 Author Share Posted May 25, 2011 Anyway, not your problem, let em both detonate together. Exactly, the crazy thing is his daughter and mine are best friends, you may see me soon on the Jermey Kyle show! Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted May 26, 2011 Author Share Posted May 26, 2011 There i was fast asleep in bed 12.10am the phone rings it's the OM wife, she was very drunk and was trying to make sense of it all, he told his wife he doesn't love my wife and his just with her because of her money.( My money!) my life has been turned into a cheap soap opera, i'm living in Chav hell. My stbxw left a voicemail asking if i was having the girls this weekend, o don't know why she keeps asking as it's part of a legal agreement? In fact in the last 12 days all she has recieved from is 2 texts messages both reading pick up fri 6.30pm drop off Sun 6.30pm, i will not give her anything else Link to post Share on other sites
What_Next Posted May 26, 2011 Share Posted May 26, 2011 Ah damn I feel so awful for you. I really do wish I could lend a hand in some way. Is there any way you can get away from all this for a few days? Just you and the kids? Try and hang in there, I cannot imagine what you must be going through. Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted May 26, 2011 Author Share Posted May 26, 2011 Ah damn I feel so awful for you. I really do wish I could lend a hand in some way. Is there any way you can get away from all this for a few days? Just you and the kids? Try and hang in there, I cannot imagine what you must be going through. Thanks, I wish i had some spare cash but i used it all to fix up the house and now i'm going to be paying a huge legal bill! Link to post Share on other sites
Mauschen Posted May 26, 2011 Share Posted May 26, 2011 Cheaters lie - the OM is prob lying to his wife and to your wife too. He tells each of them what they want to hear. In time, things will die down. Just get all of the legal issues resolved now while your wife is (possibly) still feeling guilty about what she has done. And, no, you do not have to call or text her all the time. Once for each issue/question is enough. Link to post Share on other sites
robf1971 Posted May 26, 2011 Share Posted May 26, 2011 There i was fast asleep in bed 12.10am the phone rings it's the OM wife, she was very drunk and was trying to make sense of it all, he told his wife he doesn't love my wife and his just with her because of her money.( My money!) my life has been turned into a cheap soap opera, i'm living in Chav hell. My stbxw left a voicemail asking if i was having the girls this weekend, o don't know why she keeps asking as it's part of a legal agreement? In fact in the last 12 days all she has recieved from is 2 texts messages both reading pick up fri 6.30pm drop off Sun 6.30pm, i will not give her anything else Just sit back and watch the show.. as long as you are protected Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted June 2, 2011 Author Share Posted June 2, 2011 OK,my wife seems very happy with her new man! I'm sure by now she must have received the divorce papers, but i have not heard a thing from her? I have not contacted her for the best part of 3 weeks, it feels weird and sad as this time last year i thought we where perfectly happy. I guess i best get on a get myself a life! Link to post Share on other sites
What_Next Posted June 2, 2011 Share Posted June 2, 2011 The reality is you have no idea what she is up to. She might be miserable, she might be planning revenge, she might be stoned off her gord. NEITHER case matters to you any more. She is someone else's problem now. You are right, you need to pick yourself up, dust off and start living the rest of your life. Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted June 2, 2011 Author Share Posted June 2, 2011 The reality is you have no idea what she is up to. She might be miserable, she might be planning revenge, she might be stoned off her gord. NEITHER case matters to you any more. She is someone else's problem now. You are right, you need to pick yourself up, dust off and start living the rest of your life. Good luck to you. Yes you are right! It's not my problem anymore! my self confidence is at a all time low! Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted June 7, 2011 Author Share Posted June 7, 2011 I had to go and pick my daughter up last night as my stbxw car has broken down. We spoke for the first time in 3 weeks, she won't sign the divorce papers, i asked her why and she said it's just to final. I dropped my daughter at school this morning and spoke to her teacher my daughter is struggling with high frequency words and never comes in with a jumper or right type of clothes. I know i don't stand a chance in hell but i don't care i going for sole custody, either way it will force her to get of drugs and be the mother she needs to be Link to post Share on other sites
robf1971 Posted June 7, 2011 Share Posted June 7, 2011 said it's just to final. I know i don't stand a chance in hell Remember document , document, document. You might end up with 50/50 Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted June 7, 2011 Author Share Posted June 7, 2011 Remember document , document, document. You might end up with 50/50 I have the teachers at her school on my side.. Link to post Share on other sites
2.50 a gallon Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 It has been a few days, any up dates? Gallon Link to post Share on other sites
Author russell1968 Posted June 11, 2011 Author Share Posted June 11, 2011 Hi Gang, What a week! It started last Sunday night when i was driving my girls back to her house i got a text that read "Don't even bother dropping the kids back i'm not there" She then wrote me a thank you for the divorce papers, i called her and told her she needs to have the kids, she told me i coudn't just terminate our marriage like that! I said yes i can, she said she didn;t want a divorce! I said i don't want to speak and hung up! The next day i got a text-her car had broken down and could i have my eldest daughter as she can;t get her to school in the morning, i said sure! I went to her house to pick up Daughter, i went in , it's the first time we spoke in Weeks, i said i was moving, she seemed shocked! Also looking a bit worse for wear! She also told me the OM WIFE had sent her a text saying that i was fit, which seemed to wind her up! Tuesday pm She cant get her car towed and was relying on a friend to pick up my daughters, she then dropped my eldest round i offered her a glass of wine, she drank half a bottle, she then said she was going to break up with OM, she ran off left the girls with me,came back '4.00am She was clearly in a bad way! next thing the police are at the door, saying they had followed her from the OM house, she denies it to the police, she get;s in bed with daughter, she ets up and goes out again. She then had a complete breakdown and ended upm staying at my house for day and a half as she was suicidal! I went to see the OM and told him that he needs to stop seeing her as she is about to lose everything, This has been the worst week of my life Link to post Share on other sites
robf1971 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 Hi Gang, What a week! It started last Sunday night when i was driving my girls back to her house i got a text that read "Don't even bother dropping the kids back i'm not there" She then wrote me a thank you for the divorce papers, i called her and told her she needs to have the kids, she told me i coudn't just terminate our marriage like that! I said yes i can, she said she didn;t want a divorce! I said i don't want to speak and hung up! The next day i got a text-her car had broken down and could i have my eldest daughter as she can;t get her to school in the morning, i said sure! I went to her house to pick up Daughter, i went in , it's the first time we spoke in Weeks, i said i was moving, she seemed shocked! Also looking a bit worse for wear! She also told me the OM WIFE had sent her a text saying that i was fit, which seemed to wind her up! Tuesday pm She cant get her car towed and was relying on a friend to pick up my daughters, she then dropped my eldest round i offered her a glass of wine, she drank half a bottle, she then said she was going to break up with OM, she ran off left the girls with me,came back '4.00am She was clearly in a bad way! next thing the police are at the door, saying they had followed her from the OM house, she denies it to the police, she get;s in bed with daughter, she ets up and goes out again. She then had a complete breakdown and ended upm staying at my house for day and a half as she was suicidal! I went to see the OM and told him that he needs to stop seeing her as she is about to lose everything, This has been the worst week of my life Stop rescuing this silly woman, she's a grown adult, keep the divorce going. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts