TG4MJ Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 Last night I was talking with the SO and got in an arguement reguarding how my job is not only making me miserable, but how it's taking a toll on her as well since the lousy pay and lousy hours have led to quite a few unpleasant moments between us. Out of nowhere she just talks about how embarassing it is to be associated with someone who has a lousy job with lousy pay and implies that I'm cheap and therefore a drag to be around. She then angrily declares she doesn't want me speaking to her anymore and just hangs up on me. She then txts me saying that she hates the negativity and that it's bad for her and implies that her gallbladder hurting is my fault (she needs surgery for this and though she doesn't realize it I hurt real bad inside for not being able to help at the moment) and says that her leaving me will "teach me to be a nicer person." As many of you who met me when I first came aboard LS may know, when rejected, I become something far, far, far from "nice".......... Call it infinite patience, maybe even a courtesy, but for now I'm going to assume that what she said to me was said more out of pain than out of a genuine intention to want to abandon me like, well, pretty much all the others. To even make a point, I went ahead and put in my two weeks notice at the very same job she seems to have a problem with me having and txted her back telling her I did this to appease her, but is completely unappreciative of this (big shocker there huh ?), not even choosing to respond, effectively crushing me as well as reawakening a part of me that I genuinely thought was gone for good (see previous threads of mine for further understanding.) I guess all I can do is just wait and see what happens in two weeks. Best case scenario she just fesses up to throwing a fit cuz of the pain in her gallbladder and I can rescind on my two weeks notice at work. Then again considering my luck the chances of that happening are slim to nil. The last time a girl did this to me I went on a small scale rampage that could have landed me behind bars and for lack of a better terms, I'm not in the MFing mood to go thru that sh** again. Nice to know that reguardless of age and maturity any woman can and apparently *WILL* get you in a twist reguardless of what you do for them. God help us all. Link to post Share on other sites
Duckduckgoose Posted January 25, 2011 Share Posted January 25, 2011 It sounds like she is using your job situation to justify her gallbladder problems? I have gallbladder issues, have had since I was 23... I have never had pain or an attack due to stress. It has always been due to factors I can control; greasy fatty foods, foods that cause digestive upset (in my case milk products), too much spicy foods, Birth Control pills. And I have had plenty of stress since I was 23, but the result was never a gallbladder attack. I did read from several sources that gallbladder could be stress related.. but only one was reliable, the others were trying to sell me a colon cleansing or telling me that Chinese medicine relates gallbladders to anger(?). She might also be guilt tripping you thinking you will pay for her gallbladder surgery and that everything will be better after that? I am getting some guilt-trip and gold digger vibes from what you wrote about her. As for you getting angry when stuff like this happens... it sounds hard but just let it go, let it go. I have been getting counselling for my anger... and especially since I am in the middle of a divorce. You said at times like this you get angry enough that you might end up in jail. STOP! Stop what you are doing, seek anger management... get a baseball bat and go beat the crap out of a dumpster or tree but it doesn't do you any good to go on a rampage. I have an angry neighbor that otherwise seems like an okay guy, and he is probably in jail right now for beating the hell out of someone with a beer bottle. Don't be him please! Link to post Share on other sites
Author TG4MJ Posted January 26, 2011 Author Share Posted January 26, 2011 I don't know too much about this, but she has actual gallstones. Some times she gets a really nasty pain somewhere on her sides or something. When she's hurting she downs Aleve like tic tacs man. Some times she says she misses work because she can't sleep cuz the pain is so bad some times. I've told her that I want to help her out but I don't know, she wants to put it off due to the lousy sick day policy where she works. Like I said, I'm a patient and compassionate man, I know that some times when someone is hurting they tend to be a little more easily agitated so I'm gonna just give her some space and see what she has to say and hopefully it'll be something good. Like I said, she first demanded I never speak to her again then txtd me so I know she's got a shred of regret over telling me not to ever speak to her ever again. For now just gotta wait and see..... Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted January 26, 2011 Share Posted January 26, 2011 In this economy, it's an accomplishment to have a job! You shouldn't have to apologize to anyone for the kind of work you do. Why would you quit your job just to appease her tantrum? Do you have another, better paying job lined up? If she's upset you're making bad money, how is she going to respond to you being jobless? I wouldn't have quit before lining up something else. People are responsible for their own stress, it's really, really unfair and ridiculous of her to blame your work and lack of income for her stress level. Link to post Share on other sites
0hpenelope Posted January 26, 2011 Share Posted January 26, 2011 In this economy, it's an accomplishment to have a job! You shouldn't have to apologize to anyone for the kind of work you do. Why would you quit your job just to appease her tantrum? Do you have another, better paying job lined up? If she's upset you're making bad money, how is she going to respond to you being jobless? I wouldn't have quit before lining up something else. People are responsible for their own stress, it's really, really unfair and ridiculous of her to blame your work and lack of income for her stress level. I agree with this. Link to post Share on other sites
jenifer1972 Posted January 26, 2011 Share Posted January 26, 2011 Her responses sound immature, but we didn't hear what you said.. Link to post Share on other sites
ccfan Posted January 26, 2011 Share Posted January 26, 2011 (edited) Last night I was talking with the SO and got in an arguement reguarding how my job is not only making me miserable, but how it's taking a toll on her as well since the lousy pay and lousy hours have led to quite a few unpleasant moments between us. Out of nowhere she just talks about how embarassing it is to be associated with someone who has a lousy job with lousy pay and implies that I'm cheap and therefore a drag to be around. She then angrily declares she doesn't want me speaking to her anymore and just hangs up on me. She then txts me saying that she hates the negativity and that it's bad for her and implies that her gallbladder hurting is my fault (she needs surgery for this and though she doesn't realize it I hurt real bad inside for not being able to help at the moment) and says that her leaving me will "teach me to be a nicer person." As many of you who met me when I first came aboard LS may know, when rejected, I become something far, far, far from "nice".......... Please do not put up with these kind of comments, seems to me that she wants to lower your self steem for whatever the reason (probably to get control over the relationship as it was in my case) DO NOT put up with this kind of stuff. Like another poster said, in this economy having a job it´s an acomplishment by itself... I can relate as mi ex told me the exact same things your girl is telling you. She didn´t like me being a musician, and wanted me to get a "real" job even though i do financially well and play with a high profile band (appearing in mtv, hits in radios, tv, and stuff like that) she wanted me to quit and get another job... in my case it was really ridiculous as she was a mess with her finances and was always broke, so the "music" money that she despised so much was always her secutiry net. One day I told her that if she wanted to date Donald Trump she was welcomed to , she got the message, I think you should stand your ground and not let her beat down your self steem... Edited January 26, 2011 by ccfan Link to post Share on other sites
Author TG4MJ Posted January 26, 2011 Author Share Posted January 26, 2011 Well yeah it's true what your saying about having a job nowadays, but in all honesty, she did kind of have a point about how my not liking my job is affecting her, I mean no one likes having a miserable SO and I admittedly am not happy at all. It sucks because some times she wants to go out and well, I made the mistake of trading a desk job for a job I thought I'd be making nightly cash with, but I was pretty much suckered. If I was given more hours things would be different, but since I got there it's always the same effing hours, just friday and saturday, 5 to 3. She works all week, and I work weekends, and hours like that, it's just multi level misery I don't want to elaborate on. Well today I'm gonna try a few different places. I worked in customer service for a little over 4 1/2 years, and I know there's a few places like that hiring at the moment, so I'm gonna go ahead and go check out those places today. I wanted to take a break from the phones for a while, but well, I care more about how she's affected than how I am. Scuse me for waxing poetic but that's just how I feel so that's how I'm gonna say it. Best case scenario it'll prove something to her and she'll come back to me. Like I said, it's just a waiting game now. Alot can happen in two weeks, all I can do for now is ready myself for the outcome, whatever it may be.......... Link to post Share on other sites
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