robin Posted August 11, 2000 Share Posted August 11, 2000 what do you think if a couple disagree on being friends with an ex? one has to lose if the other can't deal with it or just doesnt' agree with it. should they split up or try to work it out? i was in this situation a long time ago and don't want to be again as i am dating someone who is friends with his ex girlfriend. that is o.k. for some people but i believe ex's have no place in a current relationship and it is time to cut the apron strings. am i wrong? i don't ask them not to be friends with them anymore, i simply state how i feel about it and walk away, if they agree not to see that person any more then it is their decision as it is mine to leave the situation, right? so then why later on am i made to feel guilty or referred to as jealous? i leave my ex boyfriends behind if i get in a new relationship with someone who don't like it, if they arent' bothered then i am not bothered. if we both agree then it is good, if we don't i leave. am i wrong? i would just like an opinion on this, thank you Link to post Share on other sites
Help Me Posted August 11, 2000 Share Posted August 11, 2000 Just know that people are what make life interesting. I am friends with most of my exes. I must have seen something in them in the first place to want to go out with them. I, on the other hand, do understand where you are coming from. It is hard not to wonder if the ex will cut in on your action. I do look at it though from a different light than you. I do admire the fact that you put your money where your mouth is though. I can't fault you on expecting your s/o's to do the same. I just thought that I would shar my opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 11, 2000 Share Posted August 11, 2000 You're not right or wrong...that's just how you feel. I think in most cases, it is not practical or respectful to bring an ex into a new relationship as a friend. It is awkward and uncomfortable in the new relationship. Sometimes though, it just works out nicely but not often. You can make whatever demands you want of a new friend. You can tell him if he doesn't sever all ties with his ex, it is over. It's up to him. Fair request...fair response. There are some people who would not give up their friends for any romantic interests. Their are others that drop them automatically because they want to devote all their energy to the new relationship. Whatever works for you. It's really a matter of opinion as to whether it's right or wrong to ask a new partner to leave off the ex. But for the most part, I think it's probably reasonable. But there are a few exceptions to this. Just have to play it by ear. Link to post Share on other sites
Julia Posted August 11, 2000 Share Posted August 11, 2000 Well when I started seeing my ex, he had just broken up with his ex 2 weeks before...... This ex called even more than i did, and got in the way of the rship.......i was fine with it at first, but i got pissed off when she only left us alone for 1 month out of the 4 we were together..... The thing is he caught up with her twice, even knowing that she still wanted him back...... His other ex, kept in contact with him as well, and he started catching up with her also...... I think this ruined are rship, cause he made excuses for it.....and he agrees that if his ex didnt come between us, we would still be together, its just that i got so insecure about his contact with the exs But I can tell u this, the week since we broke up and the two weeks before when we were having our break, the doubting and all that hurt went away......so its so good not having that on ur mind, all that worry, made me crazy! All i can say, is watch out! If they phone more than u do, u know they want him back! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts