bentnotbroken Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 LOL... actually yes I am.... I'm not happy with 100% of everything in my life but who is? its a Work in progress. But generally speaking yes I am happy...because: A) I see clearer than I ever have before. B) I make sure I learn from my trials rather than let it beat me up. C) I'm proud of who I am for my strengths and my weaknesses. Just because I say something that you dont like doesnt mean I'm unhappy I can agree with all of this. I feel the exact same way. Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 A lie is a lie.... EVERYBODY does it... when you can acknowledge that THEN you are being honest No, a lie is NOT a lie. When you tell a gal, "No, your butt doesn't look bit in those jeans," you're telling a lie to NOT make her feel bad about herself. When a person lies ONLY for selfish reasons (so YOU can get what you want at the expense of others), that makes one an a-hole. Odd that you're the only one in this thread who seems unable to discern the difference. Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 He never said monogamy WAS for him did he?If his wife doesn't know (and from the article it is obvious she doesn't), then he told HER he was being monogomous. It ain't rocket science. Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 According to what he's shared, he's a douche Runs rampant, don't it? Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 LOL.. and your posts arent leaning in a direction? I see you guys dont really have much to say aside from "donkey butt" lol...which is telling about the strength of your arguments I think I am the only one who said that. It wasn't an argument(as I see no reason to argue about a interview a person gave), it was my opinion. My posts will always say cheating is wrong. I suspect no one can change your mind about your opinions that there acceptable reasons and I won't change my mind that there are never acceptable reasons. Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 LOL...wow How old are all of you if you dont mind me asking Kristi... I DO believe there are degrees of deception and that is exactly my point. A lie is a lie....this is truth. Some lies are necessary...some arent...some make the recipient feel better and some justify actions.. Howver neither you, nor I are in any sort of a position to make those definitions for others in their lives.. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 And DONT bull**** me. dont tell me you tell the truth about EVERYTHING. Nobody does this and I'm sure his wife may have lied to him just as much as he did. Oh but they say its ok to lie about some things but not others...they say "sex is different"...really? back to that "convenient" argument again huh. A lie is a lie.... EVERYBODY does it... when you can acknowledge that THEN you are being honest Why do you assume that everyone lies as he does? Or as you do? You are SURE that his wife lied to him, as well? The "everyone lies" argument may make you feel better, but it is NOT TRUE that everyone lies to their spouse. It just isn't true. Not even about "do these pants make me look fat". You are defending this man (and yourself) by painting everyone with the same wide brush--assuming that everyone treats their spouse badly in some way. But the truth is---those of us in GOOD relationships DON'T treat our spouses badly. And it is no coincidence, then, that we are in good relationships I wonder what came first--the chicken or the egg? You can defend cheating and lying by saying that the relationship was bad, and the marriage was failing....but when a person believes that EVERYONE lies, and acts accordingly in marriage....is there any chance at all that they will have a good marriage? Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 My posts will always say cheating is wrong. I suspect no one can change your mind about your opinions that there acceptable reasons and I won't change my mind that there are never acceptable reasons. Then we can agree to disagree.... you think hes a donkey's butt and I really have no formulated opinion of him Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 LOL...wow How old are all of you if you dont mind me askingVarying ages. But I have to say this: It often takes some teaching and discipline to teach a child not to lie. Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 (edited) Why do you assume that everyone lies as he does? Or as you do? You are SURE that his wife lied to him, as well? The "everyone lies" argument may make you feel better, but it is NOT TRUE that everyone lies to their spouse. It just isn't true. Not even about "do these pants make me look fat". You are defending this man (and yourself) by painting everyone with the same wide brush--assuming that everyone treats their spouse badly in some way. But the truth is---those of us in GOOD relationships DON'T treat our spouses badly. And it is no coincidence, then, that we are in good relationships I wonder what came first--the chicken or the egg? You can defend cheating and lying by saying that the relationship was bad, and the marriage was failing....but when a person believes that EVERYONE lies, and acts accordingly in marriage....is there any chance at all that they will have a good marriage? ok you win... not everybody lies... .0001% tell the truth all the time LMAO Edited February 7, 2011 by StoneCold Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 ok you win... not everybody lies... .0001% tell the truth all the time I didn't say I tell the truth all the time. I'll readily admit to lying to my kids--either to protect their innocence, or my chocolate stash But it is more than a miniscule percentage that are honest with their spouse. True intimacy requires it, and many of us have it. But you do learn to not ask a question if you don't want to hear the answer Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I didn't say I tell the truth all the time. I'll readily admit to lying to my kids--either to protect their innocence, or my chocolate stash But it is more than a miniscule percentage that are honest with their spouse. True intimacy requires it, and many of us have it. But you do learn to not ask a question if you don't want to hear the answer So more than a miniscule percentage have never EVER lie to their spouse?... EVER? about anything? Do you believe in Unicorns too? lol Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 You really have no opinionn of a man who has 2 lovers? Two lovers, not just one, two. Two very, very longterm lovers and a wife. We are not talking about a man that his wife is simply not enough for him but that his lover of 5 years and his lover of 8 years and his wife are not enough for him. I think I agree with donkey butt. LOL...no... I do not have an opinion....don't have enough to go on to judge him (by my standards of judging others anyway) Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 So more than a miniscule percentage have never EVER lie to their spouse?... EVER? about anything? Do you believe in Unicorns too? lolWe aren't talking about a lie about anything, like the example I gave earlier. But lying about THEIR ENTIRE RELATIONSHIP IS HUGE! How is it that you can't understand that? No, really. I mean it. Are you being purposely obtuse? Link to post Share on other sites
Spark1111 Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 here's my opinion: I'm with the donkey butt brigade. I am glad I am not married to him. This is typically the self-entitled cake eater who justifies his extra-curricular activity with "what she doesn't know, can't hurt her." And that is true for all the women in his life. A real mysoginist! What a prince of a guy. I predict that if he ever discovered his wife did have multiple lovers on the side, he would crumple into a puddle of busted ego. Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Then we can agree to disagree.... you think hes a donkey's butt and I really have no formulated opinion of him I'm good with that. just one question if you don't mind. If you have formed no opinion of him based on the things he said in the interview. Why would you form opinions(if you indeed have?) of the posters here based on what they have said? Just curious. Link to post Share on other sites
LifesontheUp Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 LOL...no... I do not have an opinion....don't have enough to go on to judge him (by my standards of judging others anyway) So I'm wondering what you are doing by posting on this thread. Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I'm good with that. just one question if you don't mind. If you have formed no opinion of him based on the things he said in the interview. Why would you form opinions(if you indeed have?) of the posters here based on what they have said? Just curious.Incongruous, innit? Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 So more than a miniscule percentage have never EVER lie to their spouse?... EVER? about anything? Do you believe in Unicorns too? lol Can you imagine how great it would feel to have one person in the world with whom you could drop the crap and just be completely honest? It feels good Link to post Share on other sites
donnamaybe Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Can you imagine how great it would feel to have one person in the world with whom you could drop the crap and just be completely honest? It feels good Yes, ma'am, it certainly does! Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 THEIR ENTIRE RELATIONSHIP IS HUGE! Prove to me (without going back to that old convenient argument that i shot out of the water about the irony of sex) that he was a bad husband and a bad father...prove this...definitively How is it that you can't understand that? No, really. I mean it. Are you being purposely obtuse? No...its because I'm not being dense. You need to understand the the rest of the world doesn't live according to your definition of acceptable. Case in point... I have a friend that was cheated on by her man....she subsequently got pissed off. You say he is a donkey's butt because he cheated. SHE...you know the one that was cheated on? couldn't give a rats ass that he cheated. What pissed her off is that he wasnt careful and as a result he ended up publily embarrassing her (long story). Otherwise she would have been cool. But shes supposed to be mad for the same reasons you would be mad right? Why? Because you are the "great and wonderful you"? LMAO Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 I'm good with that. just one question if you don't mind. If you have formed no opinion of him based on the things he said in the interview. Why would you form opinions(if you indeed have?) of the posters here based on what they have said? Just curious. To try to understand you... I can say what I think... you can retort and perhaps I'll learn as a result. Hes not able to retort or defend himself....its just an article Link to post Share on other sites
LifesontheUp Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 SHE...you know the one that was cheated on? couldn't give a rats ass that he cheated. What pissed her off is that he wasnt careful and as a result he ended up publily embarrassing her (long story). Otherwise she would have been cool. And perhaps you should do some more reading on here and other forums because there a lot of people that do give a rats ass if their husband/SO cheated on them. Just because your friend didn't, doesn't mean others feel the same. Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 And perhaps you should do some more reading on here and other forums because there a lot of people that do give a rats ass if their husband/SO cheated on them. Just because your friend didn't, doesn't mean others feel the same. AH HA...Lifesonthe Up... just MAY have gotten it. You're right.. and just because others have an issue with it...doesnt mean others dont.... and vice versa...and thats my point.....you dont know..it could be anything This is why I have no opinion... Link to post Share on other sites
StoneCold Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 Is she the one you are considering cheating with? I looked at your past posts and saw you want to learn how to have an affair but are a little worried of the negative repercussions. If she is the one and she is telling you she didn't mind him cheating then I think she is ready for you. Shes my cousin... so ...uhhh... NO Link to post Share on other sites
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