yongyong Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 I don't know if I am just an impatient idiot. everytime I try to set up something with girls, they all act like CEO of major corporation. It seems like I have to set the appointment with them at least a week before according to their schedule. (easier to see government officials) If I show I'd like to see her sooner, I am going to be the 'desperate one' so I met some girls online. when I asked them to hangout by txting, all of them say 'let me check my schedule' (you guys heard this line right?) (If you used this line and are reading this, I say that was totally B.S. a busy person like you, hangingout here????? lol) I am like, come on, you are just average person who works 9-5. you don't have a lot of social life. that's why you are on dating site. why do you act like you are always busy with work and have parties on weekends? I met this girl and we had good conversation and cuddling. That was Tue. so I expected to see her following weekends. it doesn't have to be 5 hour long, movie & dinner date. even grabbing a coffee in the afternoon is ok for me. she said she could meet me next tue (7 days later). I don't understand how she can't spend couple hours for me. she is 28, just average job, lives with parents. sounds like very busy life eh? I feel like I should tell her 'sorry I will be busy on tue' because I don't get it why I should wait for her and meet her according to her schedule. I screwed up many connections becasue all of them said something like 'hey let's hangout hm maybe in couple weeks' and I didn't want to wait for those Average girls (yes if you are like Miranda Kerr, I will wait for several months) Am I just weirdo? Do guys have to work with ladies schedule? If they don't, they are either desperate **** or douchebag? Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 I think it's reasonable to have to plan ahead a week when you are first getting to know someone. You don't know each other that well and neither wants to look to desperate. But, if you are finding that they are busy for up to a fortnight ahead and then very casual about finding a time to meet, then I'd suggest they're not that interested. If a girl is interested in you, she'll find time within a week, assuming that she's not a carer or at a critical time in her life when she has exams coming up, a major project on at work, or some important family event to attend. If you ask to meet and then ask what date they could make, then if they don't give you an open window within a week, suspect lack of interest. If this goes on and you are finding they are only available once every 10 days or something, forget them, they are not interested. Spend your time and effort on someone who is. Link to post Share on other sites
Eddie Edirol Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 (edited) ive never had to wait a week to see a woman that was really interested in me. If I had a successful first date, I let them contact me, and they usually suggest another meetup, usually in a day or two, I just play along. If they talk about meeting up a week later, I assume they will flake, and dont bother contacting them. if they contact me, we can do this, if not, oh well. Assume they are planning on blowing you off when they suggest a date in a week. If they hit you up, youre good. if not, you already predicted it, no harm no foul. Edited February 6, 2011 by Eddie Edirol Link to post Share on other sites
Scottdmw Posted February 8, 2011 Share Posted February 8, 2011 This is really common. I don't fully understand why but the vast majority of women feel like they have to tell you they are busy rather than saying they aren't interested. I think the best thing you can do is just accept that that is the way it is. If a woman offers a meeting or week or more in the future, go ahead and accept it and put it in your calendar, but don't have high hopes. Make sure you are pursuing other options and don't think about her at all until the actual date takes place. Sometimes women will also feel like they need to tell you they are busy in order to seem in demand and hard to get. That is a different thing although it can be hard to tell which is which sometimes. Just watch the actions. If she does end up meeting with you she is interested. That's about the only way you can tell. Scott Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 8, 2011 Share Posted February 8, 2011 The woman who isn't too busy to meet you is your gal. The others are vapors. Let them dissipate into the nether. Keep looking. Rather than be frustrated, revel in the truth they provide you with. Clarity Link to post Share on other sites
Author yongyong Posted February 8, 2011 Author Share Posted February 8, 2011 I don't want to be like 'you are busy for next 7 days? all right see ya' If I give up right there, I am going to be the one who is impatient, negative and desperate. some guys on the forum said, especially at online dating, you should be very very patient. this guy was saying he was contacting this girl for a month before meeting first time. I guess I should be out if I don't like this rule? anyways, I met this girl as a blind date. when I asked her to hangout for 2nd time. she said she doesn't know her schedule (yeah right Mrs CEO) for next 30 days and will let me know. She contacted me she could hangout on this day. I intentionally told her 'I will think about it and let her know' see? I don't like this kind of BS game. but I had to. The woman who isn't too busy to meet you is your gal. The others are vapors. Let them dissipate into the nether. Keep looking. Rather than be frustrated, revel in the truth they provide you with. Clarity Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 8, 2011 Share Posted February 8, 2011 They know how to contact you. If their fog lifts, and you are contacted, accept their kind invitation as you deem appropriate. Otherwise, celebrate their busy-ness by leaving them to it. Trust me, they won't mind. Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted February 8, 2011 Share Posted February 8, 2011 when I asked her to hangout for 2nd time. she said she doesn't know her schedule (yeah right Mrs CEO) for next 30 days and will let me know. She contacted me she could hangout on this day. I intentionally told her 'I will think about it and let her know' see? Neither of you own a smartphone? Link to post Share on other sites
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