lexaton Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 So the guy I am/was dating lives 6 hrs away. For the past month all we do is text and he would occasionally have a 10min convo on the phone with me which he always abruptly cuts short because he has to do something. He just got a job promotion so I understand that he is busy with that but being a little more communicative then what he has been doing doesn't seem too obscene. Last month I bit my tounge and pretended like it didn't bug me until friday when I saw he wrote on my girlfriends page, just a comment to her status, nothing big deal but it bugged me how he could comment on her wall but then not text me. If he is so busy why is he on facebook commenting on my friend's page. That was the final straw. I like him so much but at that point it just seemed like he didn't care. I text him and tell him to call me when he gets off work. We start off small talking and then I am telling him about something I was really excited about (someone I met that could really help career networking wise) and he responded "oh your so popular" then I just snapped. Most of my past guys I date for some reason all have a problem with me going out and networking with guys. Anyways, I told him that I feel like we are on two different pages, there is hardly any communication between us and at this point it seems like there is no progression with us because we rarely talk on the phone and there is only so much we can learn about each other through text. (We have been talking for 5 months and are not labeled bf/gf because of the distance) I expressed that I feel like it's pointless to keep talking to each other like we are in a relationship if we are not because feelings will only get stronger and we will never been in the same area to actually pursue a full on relationship. I asked him what he thought and he was kinda just shocked by the conversation all together. He said he thought I was happy with how things were and that he can't be getting serious right now bc of his new job and the distance would cause him a lot of jealousy and then he said that I can see other guys if that was the issue. I don't want to do that, I just want there to be more presence in each other's lives and more communication. Anyways he wasn't really telling me anything and sounded like he had no idea what to say so I was like I am just going to give you some space for a few weeks and then 5 min later he says 'do u want me to call u tomorrow' (he never did, which i expected) so now I am just hoping he has seen my perspective. I am not really sure what to do here. I can either hope that this convo shook him a bit and was a wake up call that things need to be changed or walk away. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lexaton Posted February 7, 2011 Author Share Posted February 7, 2011 bump. please some opinions Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted February 7, 2011 Share Posted February 7, 2011 (We have been talking for 5 months and are not labeled bf/gf because of the distance) Being one to have been in many relationships I find that men tend to not make effort unless there is a reason, if you were his GF I can see how you would be upset about the minimal contact, But you have not established that so he's treating you like "A long distance friend" and prolly doesn't think he need's to put in any more effort with you, which is why he would be surprised by the conversation. If you're not in a full on relationship I would consider what he's doing pretty normal. Link to post Share on other sites
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