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It ended today...


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Stop telling this joker that you can't be friends because it is too painful. All that is telling him is that you are still on the hook. They always come back. Right now his wife is probably vacillating between bat**** crazy and I love you. The times you hear from him is when she is calling him a son of bitch and he needs an escape. This cycle with him and his wife is likely to go on for years.

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Thanks everyone for your replies!

 

Can anyone recommend a company to use? I'm in Australia & didn't even know there were companies out there that did that sort of thing.

 

The only thing I know about her is her name! I have no idea where they live (they just moved).

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loveletters

Try http://www.intellius.com - put in their name & search for them in the state they live in. If you're unsure it is the correct person, it usually gives who they are 'related to' - husband, children..etc. I've used this numerous times to get a background check and other info on my xMM & it helped me make a decision on leaving him, as much as it still hurts... Good luck!

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Silly_Girl

Hinder - are you or have you been responding?

 

It just seems odd to contact the wife now if you weren't interested in doing so before. Rather than her putting some reins on him you can go to the police re harassment.

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Try www.intellius.com - put in their name & search for them in the state they live in. If you're unsure it is the correct person, it usually gives who they are 'related to' - husband, children..etc. I've used this numerous times to get a background check and other info on my xMM & it helped me make a decision on leaving him, as much as it still hurts... Good luck!

 

Sorry to say that this and most other reverse directories and the like, don't work in Australia where Hinder is.

 

Unfortunately there's less publicly available information here than in the USA.

 

You could start by googling her name to see if she comes up associated with her employer or any other organisation. You can physically check the electoral roll but this will only work if she has advised them of her new address. Many people only get around to this if there's an election pending.

 

If they purchased their home then you can check your State's Lands Titles records to find their new property address. The cost for the search is usually quite cheap. Where I am it's less than Aus$7.

 

Also try the on line white pages as they might not have a silent number.

 

Once these are exhausted you might need to hire a PI, but there's no guarantee as they will start off with the simple searches I've outlined above.

 

I managed to find the details of the BW of the other MM (that my fWH's OW was having an A with) and also the new address of the other MM and the OW using the above.

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Hinder - are you or have you been responding?

 

It just seems odd to contact the wife now if you weren't interested in doing so before. Rather than her putting some reins on him you can go to the police re harassment.

 

I guess you mean the harassment of Hinder by the MM?

 

This would probably work but it would be best if Hinder first spells out to him that she considers it to be harassment and will make a report of it if he continues his harassment of her.

 

If she doesn't do this the Police may not take her seriously as she has previously welcomed his contact with her.

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