I'm so sad I need someone to talk to :'(

[Jenny317]

[font=times new roman][/font][color=blue][/color]www.freewebs.com/bitchie2004/ i had a boyfriend and his name is Joseph, and the first time we went out, he cheated on me with this girl named emily, so i broke up with him. And then he said sorry, and then we went back out again, and he cheated on me again with a girl named Felisha, and he broke up with me. If he cheated on me twice then why do I still love him? Can somebody please help me?

[average guy]

I acn't explain why you are still in love with him, only you can figure that out, but you do need to stop seeing him. take some time away from him and gather your thoughts. you need to build up your self-image and self-esteem before you continue with him as I have afeeling he is treating you without the respect you deserve, but you need to be able to demand that respect if you want to get it from him. in the best world, he will confess the error of this ways and change his behaviour and learn to respect you. if not, i would say walk away and find someon who loves you for who you are and treats you right.

 

Best of luck

 

Cheers,

 

A.G.

[bittersweet]

I'm in kind of the same situation. a few weeks ago, I found out my b/f was cheating for 3 months. I fogave him... 2 weeks after that he did it again, with the same girl. At that point I made it clear that I wasn't staying around for it. He and I had numerous conversations last week and he decided to cut things off with the other girl. Now, she is saying she is pregnant with his baby!

 

The advice I have for you is to tell you that you both really need to get down to the bottom of things you need to talk about these things

 

1. Is he still "in" love with you?

2. What made him cheat? (this is where he will put some of the blame on you)

3. Tell him he has a chioce. He's not obligated to be with you and you do not deserve to be cheated on.

4. Tell him what you want as far as the relationship goes. Maybe he doesn't want the same things right now.

5. Remind him that its just as easy for you to cheat if you decided to. Remind him you wouldn't because that's not why you are with him.

6. Ask him if he wants space right now. You might be hurt by his answer but you can't stay in this situation if he's not going to be faithful.

7. Don't make him think that you'll be there forever. Remind him that you have certain needs that could be found somewhere else if he's not willing to commit.

 

It's really hard when a b/f cheats more than once. I started feeling like the fool. When my b/f and I talked about these things, I was more undersanding of what he really wanted. He wants to be with me forever but it has been 6 years and we haven't even gotten engaged. I don't know how serious you two are or how long you've been with him but if its not serious- get out now!!!

 

I'm sitting home waiting for my b/f to let me know what the deal is. I told him he needs to find out the truth about this girl's pregnancy b/c abviously, no matter how much we may want to be together, it would be impossible if this girl is pregnant.

 

keep me posted !

[Arabess]

This guy isn't 'love' material, he's a player. One of the responsibilites of dating is not to let someone else play you and make you miserable. It's not about love....it's about pride and having respect for yourself.

 

I wouldn't speak to him again regardless of what I thought my feelings were for him.

[priscilla]

Jenny, you have to distance yourself from this guy and gradually you won't feel so strongly for him. If you did stay with him he would keep cheating. And, he broke up with you. It is over. Would you want to get back together with him so that he could cheat again? That is the way he is and you deserve much better than that. Try and focus your energies on other things like hobbies, friends, family. This way you are not thinking about him so much.

[longlegzs80]

For someone who cheats, he obviously does not love you or care about you what so ever. Sorry to be so blunt, but if you keep accepting his behavior he will keep doing it to you.

 

What you need is some confidence in yourself that you are better and you deserve better and doing need the stress of someone who cheats on you. But that is your choice. You can have a better life for yourself and have a boyfriend that truely cares about you. But you need to throw and I mean throw this losser to the curb. You deserve alot better.

 

P.S. Sorry for the bluntness.

[eye]

The guy your in love with doesnt deserve you sweetie guys like him doesnt deserve the love your willing to give, dont feed his ego, I saw your pic and your an attractive chick, concentrate on yourself and by all means let him drool. btw I love your poems:

 

Roses Are Dead, So are we

Roses are dead

Violets are too

I'm still in love

But not with you

You thought you hurt me

And made my cry

But I was in love withh another guy

Simply because you have no glass

So all you can do

Is kiss my ass

You sit around and talk your sh*t

So **** you and yo lil' ass d*ck

You tell yo homies

You played me like a b*tch

And i'll tell my girls

You have a lil' d*ck

You said you loved me

But it wasn't true

But now I am here crying

All because of you

[bethbeatrice]

I have a phrase for you....

 

"You can never trust a traitor."

 

Once a cheater, always a cheater. One question, are you sure that you are in love with him? One date is not alot to base love on. You sound like a very sweet person, I am sure that there is a much better man out there for you. Good luck.

[reformedcheater]

Once a cheater, always a cheater

 

i dont agree with this statement. it takes lots of soul searching and honest scruitiny but i believe that with time and lots of mistakes, you CAN change. this may not be true for everyone, but in my case i have found that i cant be faithful to someone once i have gotten into the cycle of cheating in that particular relationship, but if i dont get into that cycle in the first place, i can remain faithful.

 

it took a personal tragedy for me to actually change, i had stopped cheating, but the resentments and mentality were still there so the potential to cheat was also still there, when i took some time to reassess who i was after my loss, i came out the other side a more reliable partner.

 

in your case jenny, i wouldnt waste your energy. you still love him as you havent given yourself time to get over him. everything takes time.

[midwestconfusion]

Might I suggest that you request an open relationship? Date each other in an uncommitted manner as to be able to see other people freely but make sure that you are using protection when you engage in intercourse, oral or otherwise. Open your eyes to other prospects and perhaps once he learns that you aren't sitting at home waiting by the phone for his call because you love him so much, he might change his behavior. Right now he knows he can go out and play games because he's got you to be his "constant". You'll always be there for him once he's done conquering Mt. Crystal or Mt. Brittany.

 

You deserve to date. Sounds like you're young enough. Heck, summer is just around the corner. Imagine how much fun it would be to be able to hang out with the girls on the beach at a bonfire, see a cute guy on the other side and be able to strike up a conversation that might lead to a dinner the following weekend. If you are young...as long as you want to see this guy that you're "in love with", do so (you can love more than one person you know...the heart can be that strong) but make sure you tell your b/f that you want to carry on with an open relationship....that you want to see/date him but also have the option to see/date other people if the opportunity presents itself.

 

See what he says. Worth a shot.